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Description
I'll write a proper description when I manage to collect myself a bit more.
This is a tribute doodle page for my cat that passed away on the end of November this year.

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There's a lot I want to say in regards to Frankie. But I guess going with when I found her would be a good start.

I found her randomly during a scooter ride around my neighborhood on a week day, it was exactly 1st December of 2021. Originally I was just going to pet her as I passed by but when I saw the state she was in I couldn't in good conscience leave her be by herself because she would've died other wise. She was likely abandoned by someone of her own mom seeming that she was the runt of the litter. I can back home with her in my arms frantic as to what should I do for this poor blind kitten that was in awful condition, she was only the size of my palm back then, around 4 weeks old.

It had been a solid few years since I've taken care of or even fostered kittens, so I was pretty flustered as what to do next. After cleaning her up as best as I could, I tried to feed her but it seemed as if she would rather sleep under the sun. But she did eventually got hungry enough, I had to spoon feed her though which I didn't mind at all. I was just glad that she started to eat. The first few days were super nerve wreaking because I didn't know if she was going to make it. Honestly I didn't get much sleep during those times, because I really didn't want her to die on me. I promised her that if she made it these past few days and got better that I'd give her the best life I could.

After going to the vet, giving her meds and lots of yummy food she did progressively get better. A lot more active too, she'd play and would have zoomies throughout the day, she'd even wake me at the ass crack of dawn or in the middle of the night just because she was hungry. She would always sleep with me because I was a warm source for her, I never really minded though because I really loved the company. She made her fair share of messes throughout her life, since she had trouble going to the bathroom, being blind and all she would have a lot of bathroom accidents on me. It was really tiring to have to clean up, but I didn't really mind since she was my baby. She could've gotten away with murder and I wouldn't bat an eye. I'd probably just sigh and scold her a bit before going about as normal.

She was such a messy eater, when she was a kitten she'd place half of her body into her food bowl so she could devour every bit of food. She got too big for her food bowl eventually but the messiness didn't really change. I didn't really mind though, I think looking after her made me a cleaner person in general and I didn't put off cleaning my room like I use to. But because of how much of a mess she was after every meal I'd have to give her a bath often, but in turn it made her very use to them, so she didn't make a huge fuss when I needed to give her one.

She was spoiled rotten, because that's what I wanted for her. Always so clingy and didn't understand what personal space was, even when I needed to use the bathroom she'd insist on following me inside. Don't get me wrong it was super weird but I always appreciated her accompanying me when I had a really bad stomach ache. She loved sleeping on my pillow, even when she got too big for it to the point she'd push my head away when she slept on it. But it never bothered me, I liked waking up to her fluffy fur in my face.

Frankie liked to wake me up a lot, if I didn't wake up from her loud meowing she'd move on to licking y face and if that didn't work she'd start digging into my pillow until I woke up. She's probably the reason why I wake up around 5 am because that's when she would have her meals. Even when I'm hyperfocused on work, she'd remind me to take breaks because she either wanted to be fed or wanted attention.

I got her so many toys in her life time, so many that she has ripped to shreds because of how active she was. Had to throw out her first cat tree due to how damaged it ended up being from her clawing at it. Who knew the runt of a litter would turn out to be so mischievous, but I'm glad she was so playful. Even before she passed away she was playful as ever.

Frankie came into my life when I just dropped out of uni, I didn't know what I really wanted to do with my life... okay I did, but I didn't have the motivation to live for myself. But she did, she was my reason to live and everything I did I did for her. I'm in a much better place now thanks to her, I've changed for the better. I thought we'd spent more time together, I though she'd stay with me until I moved out. But I guess fate had different plans.

Next thing I know I found her dead in between the vases with foam around her mouth and her body had gone cold. It was in the morning, after calling her a few times and not seeing her run or hearing her meow I got worried. I wondered if she had gotten out by accident again, so I went out around my neighborhood looking for her with my gf since she came over that day. After a solid half an hour of searching I didn't think the worse was yet to come. It didn't feel real holding her cold body in my arms, her fur was still as soft as ever, running my fingers through them and her ears and paws I thought she was going to jump right up and meow at me because she was hungry. But the more I held on to her the more in sunk in that she was in fact dead. That my baby was gone.

Everything didn't feel real, my world was caving down around me and I didn't know what to do. She was fine the day before, I don't want to think that someone had poisoned my baby, the people in my neighborhood love cats. She never bothered anyone, because she was blind she didn't really know how to get out and any possible exit was blocked off after that one time she managed to slipped away from the yard. I'm distraught just feeling ever so lost. When my dad got home we buried her body near the road side, because we didn't have space in the yard. That was probably one of the hardest things I had to do, it felt like I was burying a part of myself when I placed her body in the ground, wrapped in blankets she'd used as a kitten.

I wasn't ready to bury my child, but her time was up and I didn't really have a say in it.

The house feels so quite and empty without her loud meows, or her scratching at my door because she wants to come inside. I miss having her climb my chair and onto my shoulder even when her claws hurt a lot. I'd let her scratch me all over, make a mess in my room, wake me up at whatever time she wanted to, do all of that again just so I could say good bye one last time. Just one more time.

I've been going to sleep often in hopes that I'd dream about her, but I keep having dreams where I kill myself or hurt myself to the brink of death. I just want to see her one last time even if it's in my dreams. I just want to say goodbye to my little scrunkly.

She passed away right before her birthday, the timing couldn't be more worse, but oh well. My main reason to live is gone now, buried in the ground at the side of the road, alone in the gravel. I'm planning on planting sunflowers on top of her grave in hopes that she feels less lonely. The thought of her body rotting in the earth haunts me deeply to that point that I want to join her so that she doesn't feel as lonely. But I know that's not what I should be doing, I still have my cat Tesla to look after and her soon to be kittens.

I'm not sure how long I can hold on until that though, hopefully my upcoming visit to the doctor's can help with that. Because I am holding on by a thread. I am not okay, I miss my baby cat so much, my noisy little carpet that loved her belly scratches, that didn't understand personal space, that would lick people's legs because she wanted their attention. Having you in my life was the best thing that could ever happen to me, I'm so sad that you're not here anymore but I'll try to live on and tell people about you. Because just because you're dead doesn't mean you should be forgotten.

People often mistake Frankie as a male, even though she's a female cat. Frankie is short for Frankenstein. Since she looked as fucked up as Frankenstein when I found her haha.

It's been more then two weeks since she's been gone, and it doesn't feel real. I don't know how I'll move on from this, but hopefully with the kittens coming soon I'll find my will to live again. And instead of crying because Frankie is gone, I'll cry because she was here. That despite all the odds being against her she lived her life to the fullest, that she was a wonderful cat that made me appreciate life.

I miss her so much it hurts, even now I struggle to write this with all the tears blurring my vision but that's alright. It just means that I love her so much still.

I hope she's having fun up there, where ever she is. I hope the angels are putting up with her shenanigans like I did, but I'm sure they're having fun and she's having fun too.

Description
I'll write a proper description when I manage to collect myself a bit more.
This is a tribute doodle page for my cat that passed away on the end of November this year.

______________________________________

There's a lot I want to say in regards to Frankie. But I guess going with when I found her would be a good start.

I found her randomly during a scooter ride around my neighborhood on a week day, it was exactly 1st December of 2021. Originally I was just going to pet her as I passed by but when I saw the state she was in I couldn't in good conscience leave her be by herself because she would've died other wise. She was likely abandoned by someone of her own mom seeming that she was the runt of the litter. I can back home with her in my arms frantic as to what should I do for this poor blind kitten that was in awful condition, she was only the size of my palm back then, around 4 weeks old.

It had been a solid few years since I've taken care of or even fostered kittens, so I was pretty flustered as what to do next. After cleaning her up as best as I could, I tried to feed her but it seemed as if she would rather sleep under the sun. But she did eventually got hungry enough, I had to spoon feed her though which I didn't mind at all. I was just glad that she started to eat. The first few days were super nerve wreaking because I didn't know if she was going to make it. Honestly I didn't get much sleep during those times, because I really didn't want her to die on me. I promised her that if she made it these past few days and got better that I'd give her the best life I could.

After going to the vet, giving her meds and lots of yummy food she did progressively get better. A lot more active too, she'd play and would have zoomies throughout the day, she'd even wake me at the ass crack of dawn or in the middle of the night just because she was hungry. She would always sleep with me because I was a warm source for her, I never really minded though because I really loved the company. She made her fair share of messes throughout her life, since she had trouble going to the bathroom, being blind and all she would have a lot of bathroom accidents on me. It was really tiring to have to clean up, but I didn't really mind since she was my baby. She could've gotten away with murder and I wouldn't bat an eye. I'd probably just sigh and scold her a bit before going about as normal.

She was such a messy eater, when she was a kitten she'd place half of her body into her food bowl so she could devour every bit of food. She got too big for her food bowl eventually but the messiness didn't really change. I didn't really mind though, I think looking after her made me a cleaner person in general and I didn't put off cleaning my room like I use to. But because of how much of a mess she was after every meal I'd have to give her a bath often, but in turn it made her very use to them, so she didn't make a huge fuss when I needed to give her one.

She was spoiled rotten, because that's what I wanted for her. Always so clingy and didn't understand what personal space was, even when I needed to use the bathroom she'd insist on following me inside. Don't get me wrong it was super weird but I always appreciated her accompanying me when I had a really bad stomach ache. She loved sleeping on my pillow, even when she got too big for it to the point she'd push my head away when she slept on it. But it never bothered me, I liked waking up to her fluffy fur in my face.

Frankie liked to wake me up a lot, if I didn't wake up from her loud meowing she'd move on to licking y face and if that didn't work she'd start digging into my pillow until I woke up. She's probably the reason why I wake up around 5 am because that's when she would have her meals. Even when I'm hyperfocused on work, she'd remind me to take breaks because she either wanted to be fed or wanted attention.

I got her so many toys in her life time, so many that she has ripped to shreds because of how active she was. Had to throw out her first cat tree due to how damaged it ended up being from her clawing at it. Who knew the runt of a litter would turn out to be so mischievous, but I'm glad she was so playful. Even before she passed away she was playful as ever.

Frankie came into my life when I just dropped out of uni, I didn't know what I really wanted to do with my life... okay I did, but I didn't have the motivation to live for myself. But she did, she was my reason to live and everything I did I did for her. I'm in a much better place now thanks to her, I've changed for the better. I thought we'd spent more time together, I though she'd stay with me until I moved out. But I guess fate had different plans.

Next thing I know I found her dead in between the vases with foam around her mouth and her body had gone cold. It was in the morning, after calling her a few times and not seeing her run or hearing her meow I got worried. I wondered if she had gotten out by accident again, so I went out around my neighborhood looking for her with my gf since she came over that day. After a solid half an hour of searching I didn't think the worse was yet to come. It didn't feel real holding her cold body in my arms, her fur was still as soft as ever, running my fingers through them and her ears and paws I thought she was going to jump right up and meow at me because she was hungry. But the more I held on to her the more in sunk in that she was in fact dead. That my baby was gone.

Everything didn't feel real, my world was caving down around me and I didn't know what to do. She was fine the day before, I don't want to think that someone had poisoned my baby, the people in my neighborhood love cats. She never bothered anyone, because she was blind she didn't really know how to get out and any possible exit was blocked off after that one time she managed to slipped away from the yard. I'm distraught just feeling ever so lost. When my dad got home we buried her body near the road side, because we didn't have space in the yard. That was probably one of the hardest things I had to do, it felt like I was burying a part of myself when I placed her body in the ground, wrapped in blankets she'd used as a kitten.

I wasn't ready to bury my child, but her time was up and I didn't really have a say in it.

The house feels so quite and empty without her loud meows, or her scratching at my door because she wants to come inside. I miss having her climb my chair and onto my shoulder even when her claws hurt a lot. I'd let her scratch me all over, make a mess in my room, wake me up at whatever time she wanted to, do all of that again just so I could say good bye one last time. Just one more time.

I've been going to sleep often in hopes that I'd dream about her, but I keep having dreams where I kill myself or hurt myself to the brink of death. I just want to see her one last time even if it's in my dreams. I just want to say goodbye to my little scrunkly.

She passed away right before her birthday, the timing couldn't be more worse, but oh well. My main reason to live is gone now, buried in the ground at the side of the road, alone in the gravel. I'm planning on planting sunflowers on top of her grave in hopes that she feels less lonely. The thought of her body rotting in the earth haunts me deeply to that point that I want to join her so that she doesn't feel as lonely. But I know that's not what I should be doing, I still have my cat Tesla to look after and her soon to be kittens.

I'm not sure how long I can hold on until that though, hopefully my upcoming visit to the doctor's can help with that. Because I am holding on by a thread. I am not okay, I miss my baby cat so much, my noisy little carpet that loved her belly scratches, that didn't understand personal space, that would lick people's legs because she wanted their attention. Having you in my life was the best thing that could ever happen to me, I'm so sad that you're not here anymore but I'll try to live on and tell people about you. Because just because you're dead doesn't mean you should be forgotten.

People often mistake Frankie as a male, even though she's a female cat. Frankie is short for Frankenstein. Since she looked as fucked up as Frankenstein when I found her haha.

It's been more then two weeks since she's been gone, and it doesn't feel real. I don't know how I'll move on from this, but hopefully with the kittens coming soon I'll find my will to live again. And instead of crying because Frankie is gone, I'll cry because she was here. That despite all the odds being against her she lived her life to the fullest, that she was a wonderful cat that made me appreciate life.

I miss her so much it hurts, even now I struggle to write this with all the tears blurring my vision but that's alright. It just means that I love her so much still.

I hope she's having fun up there, where ever she is. I hope the angels are putting up with her shenanigans like I did, but I'm sure they're having fun and she's having fun too.