CosmicKitten89 In reply to EdieMammon [2023-11-03 08:44:07 +0000 UTC]

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CosmicKitten89 In reply to EdieMammon [2022-10-30 02:24:31 +0000 UTC]

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CosmicKitten89 In reply to EdieMammon [2019-12-10 01:48:40 +0000 UTC]

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EdieMammon In reply to CosmicKitten89 [2019-12-10 19:15:49 +0000 UTC]

I've missed you too 🧡 it seems as though both of us have been busy making cool shit lately

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CosmicKitten89 In reply to EdieMammon [2019-12-10 23:00:23 +0000 UTC]

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CosmicKitten89 In reply to Topsyturvy10 [2018-06-15 09:36:48 +0000 UTC]

It's not that I don't care about you. In fact every now and then I worry about you too... not that I think you're crazy or anything, it's just scary things I've heard happening in the news, but hopefully you're sheltered well from all of that.
Insane? Funny you should say that; I'm beginning to wonder that myself. As you can tell, I haven't been on this website for a while. I got out of the habit of checking notifications because I was busy with school, but then school ended and I was so out of the habit that I developed anxiety at the mere thought of going on this website. I've been that way about Facebook for a while, especially since my father died this January. My friend from Mexico was supposed to be in town this April but I couldn't be bothered to check Facebook to see if and when and where to meet him. As far as with what I've been diagnosed, I have autism and ADHD and as of recent years I'm developing severe social anxiety, but I hear no voices and so long as I don't socialize too much I do not suffer mood swings. I've been sleeping better lately too. I guess you could say I have a personality disorder. I can be alone for long periods of time and not even miss being around people. That can't be good for one's mental health. And part of being autistic is obsessing over weird stuff, much of which I wish I weren't so obsessed with because it distracts me from studying and writing more stories. Speaking of which I was working on the next update a few weeks ago... and some trolls were spamming some old stories, including Born to be King a while ago. Yes I get it; my older chapters were cringe. I wasn't medicated, so I was much sloppier about researching stuff. As for the Nazi joke in that one chapter, well you live in the U.K. and I know what's going on over there, but there was a time prior to the coming of Orange Hitler when you could make Nazi jokes without people thinking you were literally a Nazi. But maybe that's just their way of telling me they want an update?

As for my other account (Poopydada), well... yeah, the character of Poopydada is a gender-confused piano who identifies as a toilet, and an avant-garde postmodern artist whose day job is making memes, fake news and propaganda for the solid gold Grand Poopbah of the U.S., who has vowed to build a giant dam in the cistern between here and Mexico to keep the honey wagons carrying Latrinos and other third gender portaloos out... so yeah, I'm with you there if you think it takes a special kind of kook to come up with something like that 💩🎹🎶🎼🎻

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Topsyturvy10 In reply to CosmicKitten89 [2018-07-31 11:37:29 +0000 UTC]

Sorry this reply took so long.. I haven't been on DA myself and I'm also not sure if I'm any good at phrasing things to you.. I at least know it'll be better than when I first found you on Fanfiction.net. It must've been years since then..
Anyway! I'm sorry to hear about your father, and I hope that your mind doesn't linger on it too long. You're an amazing person and I can understand how a tragedy like that would affect you. Please take as much time as you need to cope- with EVERYTHING that happens- and.. I hope that things get better for you. I've also been diagnosed with ADHD and Autism (though that might be obvious), and one of the teaching assistants for kids with special needs thinks I have anxiety. I've also had depression in the past year or so, I think it would be. I'm better for the most part now, but.. If you need to vent, I'm here. Take all the time you need to get your stories written, but make sure you're taking care of yourself. I know sometimes it's hard, but it needs to be done.
Stay strong, yea? I'm here for you if you ever need me.

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CosmicKitten89 In reply to EdieMammon [2017-10-29 18:57:54 +0000 UTC]

Thank you!  But I'm not celebrating until my aunt gets back from Temecula.  I wanted to go with to see uncle and cousins but apparently it was more of a business trip than a family visit.
Next month I'll start pestering her about getting your package sent; at the very least I'll send you a card.  I should make it hand drawn and colored instead of a postcard this time.
I'm making a Halloween costume; some kind of toilet mummy from the Indus valley ruins in Pakistan where the world's first flushing shitters were born!

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EdieMammon In reply to CosmicKitten89 [2017-10-29 21:05:48 +0000 UTC]

But you are at your regular address, I hope?
That sounds awesome, but don't forget your enbalming fluid scented urinal cake fascinator. Beware the Blanco brand though; they're so abrasive on fine bone china thrones.
This year I'm wearing a costume too - I've ordered a wire headband with cat ears. They're really simple and classy. I'll be wearing them while handing out candy.

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CosmicKitten89 In reply to EdieMammon [2017-10-30 00:53:53 +0000 UTC]

Yes I'm still here.  That's just where my aunt's brother lives.  I visited them the past two Christmases... or was one of those times a Thanksgiving?  
I'm pretty sure that would be an anachronism but then again nobody really knows whether or not they had urinal cakes back then.  The entire civilization vanished either due to a pre-atomic age nuclear holocaust or got flushed down a drain to the other side of the earth which just so happens to be Easter Island which also happens to have used a very similar looking script.  Also they really did go on egg hunts on Easter Island.  Full of shit am I?  Well I did use Poopydada's rough draft of that book pee wants to write on the history of the world's shitters but I fact checked and will have you know it's only HALF full of shit.  It will surprise you to know what isn't...

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EdieMammon In reply to CosmicKitten89 [2017-10-30 23:06:40 +0000 UTC]

Urinal cakes or not, the ancient Egyptians were nothing if not connoisseurs of fragrance. They actually did tie scented wax cakes to their heads before going to dinner parties. They ate honey to combat halitosis. And worshipped cats. You'd fit right in there. Crazy uncles were not only ubiquitous, they reigned supreme for thousands of years! With their sistermommies by their kyphosis-ridden sides, of course. And when they died they went on space cruises in their fancy boats. No wonder the Easter Island statues are so... stone-faced.

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CosmicKitten89 In reply to EdieMammon [2017-11-03 05:55:43 +0000 UTC]

Well they only got a half ass burial, hence why everybody thinks they are just heads.  The Indus valley shitters on the other hand were, along with their shitlords, mummified by the sheer heat and aridity that came with the sudden, probably not anthropogenic climate change.  Whatever killed them happened so suddenly they didn't even have time to wrap their dead up in cotton toilet paper, and they were the ones that invented it too.  The Egyptians with their Egyptian Cotton wrapped mummies, that's just shameless cultural appropriation.  Speaking of which it's not enough now for the SJWs to police college students' Halloween costumes; now they're recommending that white parents not let their white kids be Moana or Pocahontas for Halloween.  But it's still perfectly fine for black kids to dress up as the Scandinavian Disney princesses.  As a matter of fact, I saw this one story about an Australian Aborigine girl who got picked on for dressing up as Elsa.  Disney took pity on her and treated her to tickets to see Frozen on ice; would they have done so if it was a white girl dressed as Mulan or Jasmine?  Perhaps the kids who were picking on her were just echoing their SJW parents who wouldn't let them be any race other than their own for Halloween, and didn't understand that there was a double standard.  How do you explain white privilege to a five year old?  
Anyway I fucked up the toilet seat halter and couldn't be bothered to fix it.   Lately I've been getting back into the habit of sleeping every night and studying that donut hole math every day until I'm done with it.  Yes, the kind of math that has no practical value in the real world because heaven forbid... the mathematics of money for example; it's like if physics had an ever-changing, wildly fluctuating Planck constant that varied with respect to at best poorly understood and at worst completely unknown variables and I would have to update my knowledge by measuring those values every time I needed to use them so there's no use committing anything to long-term memory.  Newtonian and Einsteinian physics would not be theories; they would merely be schools of thought.  Basically voodoo mathematics.  I'm sure there's a use for donut hole theory though... So by sleeping, I can know better how a donut works, but that means a lot less time to introduce you to the dictatorial throne-of-the-week... and I haven't even started the next chapter of that story which I updated ages ago so is sleep sucking the life out of me?

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EdieMammon In reply to CosmicKitten89 [2017-11-07 22:33:15 +0000 UTC]

While I certainly don't condone it it's actually quite interesting to see just how unfeasible this offended-by-everything - culture is. Ah, to be so sheltered as to be completely unaware of the rest of the world outside campus and Starbucks. The world that doesn't give a crap about made up pronouns or identities. Where they would actually have to make an effort and live with all the little nasty shocks daily life is all about that don't come with trigger warnings. By the way, would you be surprised if those "Gone viral" social justice phenomena were pure publicity stunts? Halloween night, we had both zombie Mario and Luigi on our door. Two Caucasians perpetuating the image of Italians as mindless eaters right there! But did we take the slightest offence on behalf of a minority that's non-existent in our part of the world? No, we handed them each a candy cane and sent them on their merry way.
I'm crazy busy these days which is why it takes a while for me to reply, but I have read your new chapter and will review it tonight

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CosmicKitten89 In reply to EdieMammon [2017-11-11 21:49:26 +0000 UTC]

Yeah, it's too easy to bait SJWs, they don't know better than to feed the troll and don't seem to realize that the alt-right are a monster that they created.  If they would actually try to have a civilized discussion with white supremacists maybe they would come around?  Of course it sounds crazy to think they would change their views just by discussing them, but if you think about it, what are the odds that a neo-Nazi has ever been able to discuss their views without being shut down?  Most of these people are poor and ill-educated and have little to no power to oppress anyone; if anything, they should be pitied, not demonized.  Social justice brats are cut from the same cloth as scibrats, except that they're not even smart enough to pretend to be smart and scibrats tend not to be involved with the SJW crap, although there is some overlap; case in point: Fagdracula.  He would have been a great meme had he won that scibrat pageant in 2015 or 2016 but sadly he's cozied up in his safe space at Stanford, an Ivy-caliber university in the same state as I live in, a state which to be honest I wouldn't be sad to see nuked off the planet provided everybody were evacuated first.  From what I knew of him on Facebook he was a crybully and a typical champagne liberal Democrat.  And of course he's gay; that's the only victim status that a cis white male can claim and they need some sort of victim status in order to get so much attention from the Laundro-cough-liberal media.  The scibrat pageants might pick a disproportionate number of women but they don't seem to go for affirmative action racewise.  This would make them seem more egalitarian but I suspect that they employ the right wing form of affirmative action which is legacy admission and nepotism, seeing that a shameless flaunting of wealth and connections only improves a student's odds of winning.  This is not meritocracy.  Meritocracy is ignoring the polished turds and not overlooking the diamonds in the rough, while at the same time not settling for an expedient turd in the rough and holding a polished diamond equal to a rough one.  I haven't checked the scibrats in a while though so perhaps they're doing racial affirmative action nowadays.  I read a paper by this black lady professor who got a PhD from Princeton in mathematics who got infamous for calling for white men to give up their posts as professors in mathematics to minority women, and it was, I'm sorry to say, not even demonstratory of a middle-school understanding of mathematics.  It wasn't taken seriously at all, like she was just trolling the math community.  No amount of daddy's money would get that paper an award or even an honorable mention at a scibrat pageant.  She apparently threatened to sue for racial discrimination if she didn't get her way at every turn. Just completely bottom-of-the-barrel, even by the reduced standards of affirmative action.  

I wish I could be so busy, but alas most of the time that I am "studying" I am just fucking around waiting until I feel like studying again, which can take days, so I can drive myself back into a study-rut until I am interrupted by something that requires me to start all over again.  And yes, that includes a lot of time world-building the world of toilets and helicopters and laundry machines and other such characters, especially coming up with their names.  I could spend hours researching for coming up with a good funny name.  Kim Ttong-du the Korean pig toilet anyone?  I even wrote down a list of the thrones and fountains of Canadian and Québecois political office along with Pépémémé's derogatory nicknames for them.  And also mentally storyboarding the next few chapters of my fanfic, as I did in the tub today at 2-3 in the morning.
 I should make another YouTube channel, this time an educational one, as a way of making a small income while at the same time engaging my interests in science and math, thus holding me accountable by some extrinsic factor to enforce my studies, and promoting my scientific ideas in the event that I never get to go to a proper university, a system that should crumble anyway seeing how the shenanigans I just mentioned reduces the value of an education to that of toilet paper.  I'd call myself the Starving Physicist and discuss mostly science, little bit of politics and very little if any on scibrats which I actually find kind of triggering and should steer clear of for the sake of my mental health.  I will first need a new computer however, seeing how ill-suited this tablet is for editing and recording videos and what borderline unusable piece of planned-obsolescence crap my current laptop is, and the one organization I met with that could pay for me to have such things for my education refused to assist me unless I signed up for a class that is NOT online, which for the sake of my mental health I refuse to do unless it's an advanced physics or math class.  And it's been hard enough getting the services I need just to sign up for that.  I tried doing it mostly on my own but even asides from the paperwork, a subject I am mentally retarded in, I need transportation and somebody to do the talking for me lest I say something that makes them call the cops on me to drive me back to the loony bin...

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EdieMammon In reply to CosmicKitten89 [2017-11-15 04:01:49 +0000 UTC]

Did you get the poster? I'm working on the English translation of the book, and just finished the first chapter. (26 pages). Only 90. 000 words left to translate! And a slew of Woolseyisms to create! But it snowed today, so at least I have that going for me, which is nice.

I thought about what you said the other day. I think every generation this past century has been creating a self-fulfilling prophecy. The postwar generarion told their kids, the baby boomers: "Keep your noses clean and work hard". And what happened? First the Vietnam war, then hippies, then the sexual revolution, then AIDS and finally, serial killers. The Baby Boomers told their kids, Generation X, to ease up and don't take themselves too seriously. And what happened? Yuppies, and the great crash of '87. So they told their kids, our generation, to work hard and keep our noses clean. So we study hard. New educational models mushroom like athlete's foot in a locker room, and the unprecedented development of new media, the internet, television, cell phones etc., becomes important tools, but woe betide the round peg that won't fit down the square hole, as they are immediately labeled autistic, hyperactive, oppositional defiant, et cetera. We're constantly told how unique we are, but in the same breath that nothing is more important than fitting in. No generation has ever been more educated, nor lower paid, because by the time it became our turn, our dear leaders had long since squandered our birthright on expensive wars and 70 year olds who refuse to retire. What will happen, I wonder? Is the backlash already over us, taking form of an extremely politically correct culture in lieu of addressing the real issues at hand?

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CosmicKitten89 In reply to EdieMammon [2017-11-15 12:28:53 +0000 UTC]

Yes I got it yesterday.  I'll tack it up as soon as I think up a tack... or some tape... everything on my wall is nailed there with big nasty nails that would tear a giant hole in the smooth delicate paper.  I put it where I can't spill food on it like I do all over my bed.
I thought the Baby Boomers were mostly the parents of our generation?  Or was that just the younger Boomers like my parents who didn't have kids until their 30s?  They were old enough to remember the assassination of JFK (The Bitch who is an earlier Boomer claims to have been in the very place at the very time he was assassinated) but too young to have been drafted in Vietnam or protest that war in college (but I think my mom was involved in civil rights marches or something like that?)  My mom could've been a yuppie but apparently they were only hiring minorities at the time she had gotten out of college.  Not that that's an excuse for all the fucking around she must have done not to have gotten hired in a day and age when even soft social science degrees were worth something.  
I think part of the problem is that much of our generation is overeducated.  As in they shouldn't have gotten in to whatever college they went to in the first place but because their parents had to have their way the colleges became watered down and now it's only scibrats (ours is unfortunately the scibrat generation) and other well-connected that can get a decent job.  What's more, the gap in education between the formally educated and the NEETs like me is slim if not already closed and widening in the other direction.  Maybe I'm out of touch or delusional, but I feel like I can think more clearly outside of the fog of war that comes with engaging with work, formal education, even social media, let alone socializing in real life.  In fact, I think it's what keeps me from autistic screeching and going Trigglypuff on a constant basis (admittedly, at least I invented my own topic to get triggered about).  As for political power, the SJW generation so far is only employed in the capacity of writing shitty online articles about why X is problematic and one can only hope that they're just trolling because they're desperate and grasping at straws for something to write about for the sake of keeping their job. Why we should ban white males from voting (I see a lot of MGTOWs and the like griping about why women shouldn't be allowed to vote but as far as I've seen only shitposts, not paid publications)... Why I refuse to read books written by white males (Even the most sexist of reverse SJWs probably read Ayn Rand?)... Again, they are granting degrees to and hiring the wrong people.  I would never need to grasp for straws if I were employed as some kind of writer; I am never without ideas for something worthwhile to write about.  Just name X and I will write a full TP roll's length of sentient shitter-centered shitpost about it, and it will have perfect spelling and grammar and I won't even need to use autocorrect.  On the other hand, if we assume that they're serious when they suggest legislating their reverse bigotry, then imagine what kind of politicians they would make?  Maybe their rhetoric is just so extreme because they are frustrated with their political impotence, but will it cool off by the time the gerontocracy has died off and the torch is passed to them?  Or will they repeat history and overthrow the Constitution and especially the First Amendment to create a new communist state?  No way will a civil war/revolution work; today's commie LARPers can't even pick the right target (your enemy is the CORPORATIONS not the KKK proletariats with the tiki torches!) and the other side is more skilled with both guns and meme warfare.  For that matter the up and coming generation, borne by late Gen-Xers and older millennials who were teen babymamas is reportedly more conservative but they're not the Bible-thumping gay-hating warmongering conservatives of yesteryear, nor are they for the most part the fringe neo-Nazi fascists that the SJWs think they are.  
They're just... sane, often concerned with real issues, and they're embracing trolling and political incorrectness in backlash to their big siblings' militant PC-ness.  Perhaps the Y generation is a late bloomer and will come into their own at the same time as the Z generation.  But the Zs' will probably be favored due to ageism and the Ys' decade, decade and a half long NEEThood not looking good on a resume.  I wonder what will be generation Z's self-fulfilling prophecy.  They grew up with the Common Core (the math seem seems confusing and unintuitive to autistics, and I thought the homework I got was a pain in the ass) and millennials calling them racist and sexist over the mildest non-provocations but not batting an eye at the violence that happens every day in their own neighborhood from groups like BLM, Antifa, ISIS, is that everybody?  And once they get into college they get some radical professor shoving blatant propaganda down their throats.  They didn't have all our 90s kid bullshit, they were playing with internet tablets since they were toddlers (unless they'vé got horrible Bitch parents) and have never known a world without internet as we have, and it's all the more obvious what propaganda the idiot box and subsidiaries are and have always been.  I wonder if they will turn insane at some point, if and how they will mess up... will they be the generation that memes nuclear war into existence?

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CosmicKitten89 In reply to Topsyturvy10 [2017-03-04 00:07:27 +0000 UTC]

Define crazy? I am certainly not psychologically normal, that's for sure...

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Topsyturvy10 In reply to CosmicKitten89 [2017-03-05 11:09:37 +0000 UTC]

That answers my question, so Thanks! I was just curious

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CosmicKitten89 In reply to EdieMammon [2017-01-03 00:53:00 +0000 UTC]

Oh, you mean Dies Natalis Solis Irascibili? That was the theme for Roy's not-Christmas sweater this...I mean, last year. He gives people a reason to wear sunglasses at night, totally Roy's spirit animal. Angry old Nergal (that's the name of the underworld's solar tutelary, according to the real-world literature anyway Why TF am I reading this and not the stuff I'm supposed to be... ) spent the "night" staring down Antarctica, riding it round and round like one of those roundabout merry-go-rounds. If that doesn't chill him out...
Oh, my card? That's so sweet of you, to frame the cards and stuff people send you. I would love to see my card in a frame. You may color my crappy doodles and/or add commentary if you like. On the other hand, if I get around to making that cards against... humanity which packs a bigger punch coming from... pianity... and PEEanity! Well there's an awful lot of those to put in a frame and you'll want to keep them away from the wrong people anyway... But you may color those too if they have pictures. Or add your own pictures. Or make up your own rules like Herr Poopydada and piss Peepee Pictures, which I still have no idea how to play... speaking of puss, did you thank puss for the scrap of bear-shit-wiper pee sent you? Let me know if pee... pisses you off, pun totally intended, since that's all pee seems to want to talk about is toilet paper commercials and how they ain't like they once were, like how much better the Mr. Whipple commercials were back in the day, and those were before my time so in order to follow his rant i had to take my business to YouTube, my generation's go-to for dated pop culture references as well as trendy new ones. And a few that as a #90s Child I am just old enough to remember like Bart Simpson's "You better not lay a finger on my Butterfinger!" Anyway, the basic shtick with this Whipple guy is that he polices the naughty customers who can't stop squeezing the bags of toilet paper like it's an overweight moon diamond. You notice how older commercials have longer conversations compared to today's ads, made slicker and snappier, the language kept terse and at a first grade level? The state-of-the-art psychological research done in the decades since have revealed that that's how to hold the atention span of impulse shoppers, and cutting-edge studies in economics and calculus prove that pandering to that demographic gives you the maximum profit for the minimum effort. Any minute beyond, say, what would play enough of that pop song to trigger YouTube's copyright detector is what we call diminishing returns. To be technically precise, that means it might make you MORE money, but not as much more as the revenue it takes... Oh dear did I just write a whole roll about... I'm beginning to sound like Herr PoopyILoveCheesyUrinalBandsLikeNumberOneDirectionDada now aren't I? Back to, um, the bear tissue? Even when I was little, it wasn't bears but it wasn't people being told not to use unpurchased bathroom tissue as a stress ball either; I think it was... elves? Or am I confusing it with Keebler... or the Smurfs... or Rice Krispies... or maybe it was a cartoon Mr. Whipple or am I confusing that with the cartoon Cinnamon Toast Crunch guy they had way before the "Can No-Shit-Sherlock over here figure out why kids love the taste of Cinnamon Toast Crunch?" brand that never seems to go out of style, much like the poor Trix rabbit, being told that only goat children can eat that colorful chow that the ape baby bastards won't let him try. I know how he feels. "Silly pleb, credentialed higher education in quantum cryptography (to name something off the top of my head) is for scibrats!"

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EdieMammon In reply to CosmicKitten89 [2017-01-03 07:25:36 +0000 UTC]

In that vein I opted not to buy cereal on my Monday trip to the grocery store and instead bought a bag of whole grain Skorpa. For a health food it is rather tasty and if you crush them in a bowl and pour milk on them you can eat them like any of those servants of Diabeetus. Also I got this adorable little box of Lindor chocolates for my Darling. It's strange isn't it? I'll allow Dr. New England to painfully drain my armpits of lymph fluid and prescribe his dastardly concoctions, which is what you Darlings call antibiotics, every time I have strep throat. But candy on a regular day? Never ever. You Darlings on the other hand will gladly live with Phlebitis without allowing the good mad scientist doctor to perform an Iggyotomy on it. You think you can heal yourself of this plague, don't you? Well, the last time I checked, none of you T&N's had gone to Dr. Horrorshow's Medical School. Where else would Herr Onkel get that cat flap installed in his skull? His head friends would have starved to death if not for Dr. Horrorshow. No one calls Wolfie a Krautkopf any more, they just back away slowly. In our world, Darling dear, that's an improvement.
I love each and every one of your accomplishment, just like I love you, unconditionally and always. Just like Dr. Horrorshow said after losing his virginity at the age of thirty two: "A milestone is a milestone". And having once been met with a "Kill it before it lays eggs!" by his new students, he was probably right.
Oh my Badness, that blasted Thai soup. It's not often you smell it through the covers. Disgusting. That's the only thing toilet paper can't fix!

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CosmicKitten89 In reply to EdieMammon [2017-01-03 12:20:11 +0000 UTC]

But you like peas, yes Admin-sama? Your Darling thought that if they were going to make her Thai curry meal mostly vegetable filler (WHICH WAS NOT ACCORDING TO THE MENU DESCRIPTION!) they could at least make it exotic vegetables and not the contents of a school cafeteria tray. Do peas even grow in Thailand? But my uncle's a vegetarian so of course he would like that place. This is why I prefer the more Middle-Eastern side of the curry family. Like biryani, so richly spiced and meaty and saffron-ricey...
Your Darling still thinks you should install fungus DNA if your lymph nodes do such weird things. Your Darling's lymph nodes have never even let her know that they exist. Is it normal for people to have to drain them when they get a cold or sore throat, and I'm just freakishly immune-hardy? It's the snot, I swear. But really, if you had genes that could produce their own penicillin whenever you needed it, and ciclosporin whenever your immune system wants to kill you over a flu shot or make you sneeze when you sniff a poinsettia... on second thought, it sounds like Dr. New England is a zombie fungus himself, based on the levels of antibiotics prescribed that kill all the meek little germs and leave only the mean dick bacteria that brag about pileus size and then fuck each other in the cytoplasm barnacle-style with it to share that cool new gene one of them picked up that does... "Psst, this gene makes you immune to that antibiotic, pass it on..." When Dr. New England is done with you you are going to be flooded with spores! And what does that make Dr. Horrorshow? By eggs did they mean spores as well? He lost it to Larry's MILF crush didn't he? He's qualified to infect you with other creatures' genes isn't he? We could always trial with Moon diamond gene. Defective tyrosinase won't kill you. It probably won't even fry at your chilly human body temperature. Well in any case his horror show better have muppets. And I'm pretty sure it was a cat door for EACH of Wolfie's head friends. Did Herr No-Depth-Perception bring home any new friends by any chance? The B-plots with Herr Poopydada are starting to... stink. When was the last time he saw Plumber Mario? No, I don't mean the video game where you drop colorful Toilet Duck tablets in a septic tank full of colored poo. Some of it's green like somebody ate too many Christmas sweets with green food coloring. And some of it is red from hot Cheetos I guess. Some of it is yellow like they ate something so fatty it gave them diarrhea... that's the only video game he plays. Not into Super Doctor Bros. or anything like that. You know, the one where you shoot pills at turtles with chickenpox?

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EdieMammon In reply to CosmicKitten89 [2017-01-03 15:14:34 +0000 UTC]

You can't assume to know someone's species based on them having a name that was hard to take to the playground. After all, what's in a name? If the doctor says you're crazy, does that fancy monogrammed lab coat give him the right to assume a safe distance and throw those time release capsules at you? Give the right aside, how about MAKING him right? Regardless, staph bacteria that bloom into infections with fever can lead to swollen lymph nodes in the armpits and occasionally the groin area as well. Antibiotics help, but they can become quite painful and need to be drained manually, preferably by a doctor or nurse in a sterile environment. A doctor will in cases of fever order a culture of the purulent matter to determine the nature of the bacteria and preclude other conditions. Most of the time these cultures come back negative, but why deny the good doctor the pleasure of squooshing armpit mayo from an infected sore and poke it with Q-tips?
I love peas and always include them in my seven layer salads. The bottom layer is Romaine and Salanova lettuce, the second is corn niblets, third finely chopped cucumber, then red onions, then the peas and finally fresh organic tomatoes.
Herr No Depth Perception doesn't approve of Salanova lettuce as it is so genetically modified it's a second away from attacking you with electric tentacles. Covered in gunk. Unfortunately because of the strict advertisement rules, it's impossible to know what kinds of health benefits, if any conducive properties, it has. But it sure is tasty! Today we're having spaghetti and meat sauce and five layer salad. I'm out of onions and peas, you see. Have you ever felt the effects of the theobromine supposedly found in peas? All they do for me is making lasagna easier to pass. It, uh, creates these air pockets. Ahem. It goes a long way to explain Herr Poopydada and mine relationship, strained as it is with my mistaking him for a luxurious Japanese toilet and all.

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CosmicKitten89 In reply to EdieMammon [2017-01-05 19:20:32 +0000 UTC]

Ugh, fruit salad, tuna salad, egg salad, potato salad, pasta salad, that shitty salad with fruit cocktail marshmallows walnuts and Cool Whip that the Bitch made every freaking Eastersgivingsmas... half of those are even things I would normally like were they not ruined by saladification. Here in Almost-Mexico we have seven-layer dip which is basically a bunch of taco ingredients thrown together in dip form. Sometimes as many as twelve layers. I like it so long as they go easy on the guacamole. Oh and talk about food crimes, my aunt puts Mexican seasoning in her spaghetti. I swear we are polar opposites not only in personality but right down to food preferences... about the only thing we have in common is that we are cat freaks, but despite one of her favorite cats of all time being a moon diamond, Lindor reminds her of the pubes of some perverted ginger she ran into as a kid. Ugh, I think I put way too much salt in this pasta with the interesting shapes I bought yesterday.
I didn't know there was theobromine in peas. If that's the case, that would explain the shared affinity you have for both that and chocolate. I don't crave chocolate quite to the point that I would eat it if it tasted or had the texture of peas. Well I don't mind snow peas, they seem much more authentic for some reason, as does baby corn and carrots sliced a certain way. I don't want it looking like it came out of a bag of frozen Green Giant (did I ever mention that my sister was and maybe still is scared to death of him as a teen?) Pistachios have this addictive quality to them so I wonder if they don't contain theobromine or some similar chemical. As for the air pockets, I believe those are formed by the digestion of raffinose. It is the baking soda to your bacterial enzymes' vinegar, if you will. That makes me mad, stupid bacteria eating up all MY calories...

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EdieMammon In reply to CosmicKitten89 [2017-01-05 23:39:32 +0000 UTC]

Operation under the belief that any noodle-based dish is compatible with Mexican cuisine is slam-dunk evidence of a switch to the dark side and of course buys that person hard labor and profuse corporal corrective measures by means of La Chancla. Made from dry Fettucchine.
Ooh; I must have confused theobromine with phenylethylamine, one of the three neurochemicals responsible for the "crush"-feeling. Ya know, my last steady partner kind of ruined me for other people, so that feeling triggers nausea as well, the same kind of nausea you get from blitzkrieging a half pound Milka bar and more than anything want an Alka-Seltzer. I doubt it's a coincidence.
My mother oversalts the pasta water too. She says pasta water should be as salty as the sea. By that she apparently means that by the time you've eaten half your helping you should be able to piss out your kidneys. A not too heaping teaspoon per liter (four cups) of water works fine. Anyone not satisfied can sprinkle some of this stuff on it. (It's MSG-free umami in a can.)

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CosmicKitten89 In reply to EdieMammon [2017-01-06 04:10:59 +0000 UTC]

Phenylethylamine is also produced by Lactobacillus brevis. You know, the friendly kind of germs, which your body must be deficient in. Hence the weakened immune system, frequent antibiotics which weaken the immune system so you need more antibiotics and also your fondness for chocolate, legumes, and don't you like tart dairy and wine? Speaking of tart dairy I wonder if Pinkberry or Yogurtland for that matter doesn't have a proprietary patent on some strain of bacteria that produces EXTRA feel-good chemicals... has your immune system always been this weak? Was it particularly debilitating after your partner left you? I wonder if your immune system doesn't misidentify your gut flora as bad bacteria for producing the chemical that makes you nauseous and thusly commit friendly fire. It's produced from phenylalanine from which tyrosine is also produced, which is why the latter is not considered an essential amino acid. I'm going to try tyrosine supplements to offset my dopamine depletion. I may also be serotonin deficient and in fact addicted to the serotonin/melatonin high of sleep deprivation, and it doesn't help that my meat (tryptophan) intake is somewhat limited by my lack of cooking skills, but apparently l-tryptophan supplements are outlawed in the US.
Well I didn't drain it that well, since the colander seems to have mysteriously disappeared, but most of the water was boiled off anyway. I played with dumping salt in it to stop it from boiling over. I should have rinsed it... the sauce is called rosé, it's like an Alfredo mixed with a tomato sauce. The pasta is this really neat and twisty kind (hence the enhanced salt retention) called campanelli and I also bought orecchiete, both of which I cooked and perhaps undersalted yesterday. Salt is good before say a long trip since it acts as an anti-diuretic. Aspartame, on the other hand, I swear must be a diuretic more potent than caffeine. I had full bladder ready to piss literally every two minutes last time I had a big aspartame drink. Similar sized sugar drinks don't pass quite as quickly, but I'm not sure if that isn't because sugar like salt retains water to some degree.

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EdieMammon In reply to CosmicKitten89 [2017-01-07 00:47:26 +0000 UTC]

Before the breakup I was in excellent health. I had had one head cold three years before that, and after, nothing. But since that, and the cancer, nothing's been the same as it was. I'm not saying that a broken heart 💔 caused this, but it didn't exactly help. The pain was so overwhelming it drowned out everything else, even the cancer pain, until a perfectly operable fibroid turned into a complete nightmare. It's a physical thing and can't be blamed on one incident or person. But the most complicated relationship in existence is that between body and soul. It's remarkable how fast the one is affected by the other's misery. Love makes you stupid, after all. Part of me is stuck in the bargaining stage; "I can't believe I allowed myself to fall in love!" Platonic love is no less powerful, my Darling. In fact it might be even stronger than traditional love with the rings and penises, as there is no physical outlet. The passion is still there.
Today I made a batch of pee soup (you heard me...) to flush out any remaining Christmas treats from Herr Duodenum. It's a lot of low carb vegetables boiled in beef broth and tomatoes. Not as effective as a bottle of diet coke, but it's worth a shot, and might even supply the body with some minerals. Only problem is you feel hungrier after eating it than before. I'm one of those freaks who gladly eats plain yogurt (it's also great alongside any Indian dish) and red wine is one of the few alcoholic drinks I enjoy. Maybe I crave peas and tomatoes for the same reason others crave chocolate and meat. My body might be deficient in some chemicals and minerals. We'll find out soon enough - next Monday I'm getting my blood tested. You need some tryptophan, huh? I'd oven roast a chicken for you. I'm not much of a gravy person, so instead during the last ten minutes of roasting time, I take the chicken out of the oven and put boiled rice in the pan, allowing it to soak up the tasty, yummy yummy juices and become crispy on top during the final phase. It's beyond delectamalicious. But what kind of drink to serve you alongside?

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CosmicKitten89 In reply to EdieMammon [2017-01-07 03:31:55 +0000 UTC]

Well I'm addicted to Blue Edition Red Bulls. I also liked the kiwi Summer Edition.
You wouldn't happen to know if you have something called Proteus syndrome? Or Cowden's syndrome or some other hamartomas disorder? Because that is linked to overgrowth of bones that may cause high arches and the hereditary unevenness you mentioned, and also endometrial cancer and a bunch of other things. Among other cancers, but the gene expression is of a mosaic pattern so it may only affect certain parts. It also sounds like you had extra high levels of prolactin and maybe estrogen when they put you on antipsychotics which is how they cause metabolic disorder and in your case cancer. You should take probiotics. My aunt caught the flu yesterday and has been in bed all day, hardly able to move. Her friends have been in and out, and one of them got me this Mexican dish that's like a seven layer pie. Nope, not sick yet. But then I never get the flu. Not counting the stomach flu but that's probably a norovirus, which is different. And it was after eating pizza that hadn't, for once, been left out for a day or two. I swear, it's gotta be the boogers. Even when I lived with the Bitch and was miserable every day, sickness was a rare thing. Well I got a cold every year which I don't get anymore.
Wel I'm planted on this couch and my phone and headphones are in my filthy room, and since that's my preferred device for watching cartoons and other random shit (I'm not bothered by small screens or to a point shitty picture quality and this tablet is sometimes iffy about playing videos and more convenient for other things) so I actually got some of my thoughts down on a couple of pages on the Memo app. Nothing that I can publish soon though. One page is mostly about a radio show called Dr. D. MentEdd, Esq.'s Demented Dimension of Dementia. A Wolfie B., age 7 (modulo 11hex) from (As pronounced by radio co-host/ventriloquists' dummy Dr. Ditto D. Doppelganger, D.D.S.) Wiener, Ostrich submitted another one of those ridiculous Herr NDP ballads; probably got Lady Heinz using that voice transformer to speak-sang it. Would you like to make a request? Sponsored by WhippleSoftTM the toilet tissue for bears that DON'T shit in the woods! (But maybe they use it as a butt plug to seal their rectum shut for when they go into torpor for the winter? That particular brand is known to do that to... um... People like Herr PoopyDaDa.) On the other page, well, it's mostly where Ludwig, having found an audience, proceeds to explain his... angst in the only way he knows how: using melodrama, purple prose, sesquipedalian metaphors... um, he coins the word "omphalosyzygy" during this speech.

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EdieMammon In reply to CosmicKitten89 [2017-01-07 09:51:18 +0000 UTC]

Mhm, Dr. Sucked To Be Him On The Playground eats some medical waste every time his head friends are in town in the hopes of getting too ill to take them out on a field trip. This crappy world your body and mine occupy is like their Amusement Park of Fear™, only with non-carcinogenic candy floss. Aww, to see those big crazy eyes light up with joy, most of it not even chemically induced.
Darling, in a month's time I'll be leaving on a holiday, but one of the body, not the mind. To find out about all those things and why I feel that insects have just as much right to live as humans. I can't squash bugs. I even turn around when Mr. Tooms feeds on them. The poor things. They think their exoskeletons are invincible until they're set upon by the merciless jaws of a death-breathed domestic feline. Grisly. And gross.
Your immune system has had no choice but to get used to all kinds of foul butt germs. Eat or die. Much like mine would if I'd had the chance. I never ate other kids' leftover lunches or pizza that's been left out for days. Not because I was at all squeamish about it, but the opportunity never presented itself. I did sneak into the teacher's lounge every now and then during classes when I excused myself to the bathroom. And the preschool cafeteria. They let their guard down, they lost an apple or a bun. People who have never known hunger, actual hunger as in not knowing when they're going to eat next, will never understand the shame. Our unwanted mother and father respectively, withheld sufficient food as a tool of power. There's not a person in the world who wouldn't break. It's the most humiliating form of abuse imaginable. It's so typical of such "parents" to stab their kids in the back and then ask them why they're bleeding. Mom asks why I don't trust her with things. The sheer amount of willpower it takes to not remind her of the time I was about to tell her about my cancer. I texted her over facebook to ask if she was home as I had something important to tell her. True to her cowardice she asked me to just lay it on her over IM. A mother's love indeed. But if you're gonna pity someone, pity her. Imagine being so narcissistic you're actually physically incapable of admitting your own mistakes and being so toxic your pettiness and cruelty affects others like a freaking mind control gas.
Since you made the kind offer, I'd like to hear "I'm Dreaming of A White Labcoat" and "His Name is Heinrich And he Dances in the Padded Cell". Tell your aunt to get well soon 😊.

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CosmicKitten89 In reply to EdieMammon [2017-01-11 09:36:51 +0000 UTC]

"You can tell a lot about a deity by where he keeps his belly button. You know he's actually got five belly buttons? For example, if the Trojans are moving into the Greek camp, then that indicates..." in the context it's not clear at all whether by Trojans the speaker is talking about asteroids or horses. Or both. But that story is going to be Wicked-Cultured-TV-Geek heaven and I can't wait to write it... but you know what they say... when one decides to grow millipede legs they can't wait to try each and every one of their new appendages out, but conventional wisdom says ONE STEP AT A TIME. This is wrong; if a millipede only used one foot every time it took a step, it would never get anywhere. No, it's a matter of figuring out the optimal gait. That is, the overall pattern of which legs are to be moved simultaneously, in an undulating motion... good look figuring that out, two legs is tough enough!
I woke up with a case of the coughing snot infection last Saturday. No fever, no bed-boundedness, if that's influenza then it's an awful lot like the common cold, at least the way I catch it. And it's almost gone already. It still took me a while to reply because I'm just so... I don't know, it's not like I'm overwhelmed with anything right now. And my story, yes that one from forever ago, I've foregone how many nights of sleep to study other, harder-to-study interests only to chase some psychotic hint of inspiration down a Wikipedia k-hole, almost against my will, studying things that are vaguely relevant to that story instead? And yet I can't even write it? The guilt over lost study nights, hence ordering tyrosine to make what's left of my prescription last? (I finished over half a month's in a week. I think I have a problem... or just require a larger dose, mine is less than half of what some are prescribed but I fear that if I get enough to take that kind of dose every day I'll kill myself... if only I didn't raise the tolerance from having to take so much just to numb the pain of being in a piece of shit school for retards!!!!!😠😢😵😭😣💣💢🔥🔥🔥LET IT BURN, AND LET THE FOSSILS THAT WOULD UPHOLD SUCH AN ANTEDILUVIAN CESSPIT BE THE FUEL TO ITS FIRE!🔥🔥🔥

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EdieMammon In reply to CosmicKitten89 [2017-01-11 22:46:40 +0000 UTC]

Centipedes are fundamentally creepy. Imagine what would billow forth if said animated strip of nopery were to get one of its legs stuck and tore it off as it mindlessly kept on walking. It wouldn't even be guts, it would be like condensated steam and molten fat pouring out of a torn chicken skin. They are the natural enemy of Dr. New England, by the way. No amount of Shout will ever get those squirts of centipede goo out of his boots. Anyway, the peruvian giant yellowleg centipede is ironically the most nurturing of mothers in the insect world. She coils her body around her eggs, washes them regularly and when they hatch, watches over her babies for up to three months. Disgusting. I don't know why we look to outer space when all the weirdos of nature are already here.

Tyrosine appears to be safe to take in certain quantities over time, but too high doses may result in the very same symptoms you take it for. Maybe it's time you got a check up from a doctor. You know how body, mind and soul are connected? If one if afflicted, the others are affected. A doctor can help determine the source of the dysfunction. I took advice and I have eaten a lot of probiotic foods lately. Now I have enough energy for the IKEA trip tomorrow.

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CosmicKitten89 In reply to EdieMammon [2017-01-11 23:52:09 +0000 UTC]

In that case I wonder why my bodily health is not more debilitated. My aunt keeps on telling me I need counseling but I don't see what good that will do. A professional shoulder to cry on? Does about as much good as bloodletting does a hemophiliac. I want to be MORE productive, not less productive, and the one saving grace of ADHD is that I am easily distracted from the tragedies that plague my existence, while on the other hand ripping the bandaid off is not only painful but starts up the bleeding again for a wound that never clotted, never formed scar tissue, that will gladly exsanguinate its host if not kept bandaged up at all times. If weltschmerz were cancer, your Darling would have long ago been another casualty of corporate scibrattery. But one might as well suggest that the sick canary in a coal mine go visit a doctor's clinic in the coal mine, as though it were the canary that is sick and not the environment that is to blame. The canary will never get any better until you get it out of the coal mine, and that's no easy feat when the entire world is one big coal mine as it will be so long as fossil fuels are in charge! It doesn't help that her aunt is hardly sympathetic, let alone empathetic to her plight. Cognitive biases are to her what head friends are to Dr. Wolfie and it's infuriating. At least head friends can put up a decent argument, and if one of them derails the discussion another one usually puts it back on track.

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EdieMammon In reply to CosmicKitten89 [2017-01-12 00:07:51 +0000 UTC]

Yes; changing only the scenery and not the situation never helps anything. I believe fervently in removing Darlings from toxic environments and finding a forum, an offline one, where they can apply themselves. Perhaps you need some more time to find it. But keep in mind that physicals aren't meant to fix you. Just gauge your current situation. The Admin Council are actually riding my back pretty seriously about this. If we are to remove you from the coal mine, what would your industrial revolution look like?

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CosmicKitten89 In reply to EdieMammon [2017-01-12 02:29:46 +0000 UTC]

Alas, there is no such forum. None that is immediately accessible to one of your Darling's limitations in any case. The sad thing is that it is easily accessible to, ahem, normies, that is, those that lack your Darling's gifts as much as they are gifted with freedom from her particular limitations. Without the gifts however... well, let's just say that no amount of enrichment will scrape together a critical mass of uranium from the entire lot of them. Your Darling on the other hand has had to enrich herself, but she has no idea if she is yet a critical mass. She aims for more than a critical mass - she aims for supercriticality; to do more than merely power the system, but blast it away altogether. But if she tries to detonate too soon, she will surely fizzle. And she will never even start a chain reaction if nobody feeds her any damn neutrons, she's not a plutonium plutocrat that can detonate itself. Which is why plutonium tends to fizzle.

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EdieMammon In reply to CosmicKitten89 [2017-01-12 03:14:01 +0000 UTC]

I never meant to trivialize your problems, Darling. It's just that I live in an apartment complex for hikikomori. The loneliest of the only one lonely. They are not particularly bright, and they suffer under their predicament in ways most people can't imagine. There's a reason the landlord has proposed installing garbage disposals in the bathtub drains. It's gonna sound weird, but you have the privilege of not being catered to. No great minds have ever been on the honor roll, so sooner or later that brain of yours is gonna find out how to get you out of this rut. Very rarely do the disadvantages of an intelligent person outweigh their advantages. I have tinnitus in one ear and in the other, voices that NEVER stop. No medication in the world has ever lessened any of them. My secret is to coexist with them despite the injustice of the both of them to occupy a space that's rightfully mine and mine alone. But do I detonate from the insomnia and anxiety attacks? No, I have a personal goal to finish my book. By Easter this year it will be finished and by fall it will be available from local bookstores and my website. Writing and applying my one true talent is so satisfying. Don't ever let the voices get the better of you, because the friendlier they sound, the more dangerous they are. They pat you on the back with one hand and light your fuse with the other.

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CosmicKitten89 In reply to EdieMammon [2017-01-12 04:45:08 +0000 UTC]

At least you can pick a goal and not be swayed from it. A little while ago, when I had the dubious privilege of being catered to myself, I had the opportunity to publish a book handed to me on a silver platter. An art book, where my main job was to draw pictures. Everybody thinks that THAT is my one true talent. If it is, then that is truly pitiful because there are people all over this website whose talent vastly exceeds mine. If not talent, then certainly efficiency and or work ethic. It was the ONLY talent that anybody bothered to nurture of mine growing up, and now I resent it. Even the Bitch who told me I was probably too stupid to be a physicist conceded that I was talented at drawing pictures and never not let me do that. My dad even tried to talk me into going to a college that has nothing but fucking art classes. It's the one thing that is acceptable for an autistic hikikomori retard to be accomplished at. And that is why I must strangle it. I do not mean to insult the art profession, in fact I have plenty of respect for the work of artists. But I must be emphatic in insisting that it is not an appropriate career choice for me, and barely an appropriate hobby. I never, even as a child, pictured myself as an artist. I once tried to make a multi panel comic but I was put off by the thought of repetition, of having to make repetitive panels repetitively in such a repetitive manner. Despite all that, an art career would for me be the path of least resistance, which is ironic given the starving artist stereotype. But heaven forbid I make things so easy on myself...
I envy how cut and dry, how tangible your goal is. My goal is... well, I can't even identify it. I'm basically aimless. Desperate to succeed at something that makes the scibrats look stupid as a political statement is the best I can put it and I'm not sure if that's even quite it. I feel threatened and constrained by the thought of setting a concrete goal I guess. The entire educational system, as far as it concerns me, is a humongous clusterfuck that is not built to be solvable, so I can't even think about it without going BsoD. I don't even apply for or look at scholarships for the same reason. This is the crux of my problems, that I must avoid planning things out and being responsible in order to even be emotionally stable enough to plan things out and be responsible. Last September I ran out of pills too early and suffered a load of stress from some bitch teacher who ultimately purged me from her roster, employing disingenuous tactics to ensure that she wouldn't look like she did it because of her prejudice and/or fear of students with my type of disability, and the same week I ended up losing my wallet, which I think may be attributable to stress impairing my normal everyday functioning, like for example recognizing that my purse was too light and correctly attributing why.
I just know that when a suitable and achievable goal is presented before me I will know it, and before that can happen I need more information. LOTS more information...

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EdieMammon In reply to CosmicKitten89 [2017-01-12 17:12:02 +0000 UTC]

Well, you probably know by now what makes decision making easy for me. Although glurge alone is not enough to base a life on, we've already been through what a horrible childhood does to a person. They tend to go one of two ways. Either it breeds determination or a perpetuation of dysfunction. You seem to think that I sort under the former category, and you, the latter. But it's just not that simple. This might sound hypocritical, considering the very previous statement, but the only reason anyone would remain adrift and continuing the vicious cycle is if they're extraordinarily narcissistic and/or oblivious. You've proven on so many occasions that you are neither. You have no idea how many times I brushed off my book as a pipe dream. But then I was given the dubious privilege of nursing myself back from the brink. And I did it. Real life has no concept of "happily ever after". One of those days, you know. But a lot of previously insurmountable things suddenly became a lot more reasonable. People who haven't been faced with their own mortality may want to start with what they've got. Look, just because someone run the gauntlet at some point in their life doesn't make them qualified to fix anyone else. But allow me to make a suggestion. You have a selection of open documents lying around, don't you? What if you picked one and wrote ten words? Just ten.

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