DAKGER [2019-07-22 20:45:32 +0000 UTC]

Yay! Happy birthday! Wuff wuff!!

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MrSigardTheGreatest [2018-10-01 21:36:15 +0000 UTC]

-This is a buckey.

-Dear god.

-There's more-

-No.

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MrSigardTheGreatest [2018-10-01 14:31:12 +0000 UTC]

Move, cyclops, move! Agh! Who the f-AHHH-! Medic...
... And when the patient woke up, his skeleton was missing and the doctor was never heard from again! Hahahah! Anyways, that's how I lost my medical license... Archimedes, no! It's filthy in there, ugh... Hah, berds. Now, most hearts wouldn't be able to withstand this voltage but I'm fairly certain yours-*splat*
What was noise?
The sound of progress, my friend. Hmm... perfect.
Kill me.
Later. Where was I? Here we go... heh, hahah. Hmmehehahah, HAHAHAH!
Hah... hah...
Oh, that looks good.
Should I be awake for this?
Uhh, well, no but as long as you are, could you hold your ribcage open a bit? I can't... seem to...
AGH!
...Oh, don't be such a baby. Ribs grow back! ...no they don't...
*healing noises*
What happens now?
Now? Heh. Let's go practice medicine.~
*miraculous/tragic angel chorus*
Medic!
Oh yeah! *bonk*
Doctor! Are you sure this will work!?
Hahah! I have no idea! *uber noises*
YAHHHHH!!! AHAHAHAH, I AM BULLETPROOF!
*hahahah, vat a bloodbaz and glorious pile of corpses*

That looks good, very nice there.
Yeah, thanks doc! Ho, man, you would not BELIEVE how much this hurts!
*muffled dove coos*
Archimedes?

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MrSigardTheGreatest [2018-10-01 14:02:24 +0000 UTC]

Intruder alert! A RED Spy is in base!
A red spy is in the base!? We need protect the briefcase!
Yo, little help here?
Stand back, son. 1, 1, 1, uhm... 1! No...
Come on, come on!
INCOMING, EEYAHHHHH!!!
Hey! It's still here!
All right then.
Gentlemen... I see the briefcase is still safe?
Yeah it is! Safe and sound.
Tell me, did anyone happen to kill a red spy on the way here? No...? Then we still have a problem. (And a knife)
Ohohoh, big problem. I've killed plenty of spies before! They're dime-a-dozen backstabbing scumbags, like you. Ow! No offense.
If you managed to kill them, I assure you they were not like me. And nothing, nothing, like the man loose inside this building.
What are you, president of his fan club? Heh!
No, that would be your mother!
What the-?
Indeed, and now he's here to f*ck us! So listen closely, boy, or pornography starring your mother will be the second worst thing that happens to you today.
Gimme that!
The spy has already breached our defenses.
*sap and bang*
You see what he's done to our colleagues!
*cut and stab*
And worst of all, he could be any one of us!
*crack and shimmer*
It could be you, it could be me! It could even be-*bang*
Woah woah woah!?
What? It was obvious. He was the red spy all along! Watch, he'll turn red any second now. See, red! No wait, that's blood.
So we still got problem.
Big problem. Alright, who's ready to find this red spy?
Right behind you.
*dead*

Ah, ma petite chou-fleur.~

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MrSigardTheGreatest [2018-10-01 13:40:49 +0000 UTC]

"I fear no man, but that... thing... it scares me."
"No, no, I ain't talking about that freak, alright?... She's not here, is he? How do I get this f*cking thing off!?"
"One shudders to imagine what kind of inhuman thoughts lie behind that mask. What dreams of chronic and sustained cruelty...?"
AAAUGH!!!
I'M BURNING!
HELP...!
*do you believe in magic~*

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MrSigardTheGreatest [2018-10-01 13:29:34 +0000 UTC]

Hey buddy look, I'm an engineer. That means I solve problems. Not problems like... what is beauty, because that would fall within the purview of your conundrums of philosophy.
I solve practical problems. For example: how am I gonna stop some mean mother hubbard from tearing me a structurally superfluous be-hind? The answer is, use a gun. And if that don't work... use more gun.
Take for instance this heavy caliber tripod mounted lil' ol' number designed by me.
*gun*
Built by me.
*more gun*
And you best hope... not pointed at you.

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MrSigardTheGreatest [2018-10-01 04:11:23 +0000 UTC]

"If fighting is sure to result in victory then you must fight"! Sun Tzu said that, and I'd say he knows a little more about fighting than you do, pal, because he invented it! And then he perfected it so that no living man could best him in the rank of honor!
*war screaming*
Then he used his fight money to buy two of every animal in the world, then herded them onto a boat, and beat the crap out of every single one of them!
*explosions gallore*
And from that day forwards everytime there's a bunch of animals together in one place it's called a zoo!

Unless it's a farm.

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MrSigardTheGreatest [2018-10-01 03:56:07 +0000 UTC]

I am heavy weapons guy. And this... is my weapon. She weights one hundred fifty kilograms and fires $200 custom tooled cartridges at 10 thousand rounds per minute. It cost 400 thousand dollar to fire this weapon... for twelve seconds.
*russian laughter*
Oh my god, who touched Sascha? Alright... WHO TOUCHED MY GUN!?
Some people think they can outsmart me. Maybe... *sniff* maybe... I'm yet to meet one who can outsmart bullet.
CRY SOME MORE, AHAHAHAH!!!!

Heh, cry some more...

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MrSigardTheGreatest [2018-10-01 03:19:51 +0000 UTC]

Boom, headshot.
Sniping's a good job, mate. Challenging work, outta-doors... I guarantee you won't go hungry, cus at the end of the day, long as there's two people left on the planet, someone is gonna want someone dead.
Yeah right but... no, not a crazed gunman, dad, I'm an assasin... Well the difference being one is a job and the other's mental sickness!
I'll be honest with ya: my parents do not care for it.
I think this mate saw me... y-yeah, yes he did!
Feelings? You know wut's a lotto' feelings? Blokes who bluedgeon their wives to death with a golf trophy. Professionals have standards: be polite, be efficient, have a plan to kill everyone you meet.

Dad... dad put-eh... put mom on the phone...

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Azerty72200 [2018-07-26 00:43:25 +0000 UTC]

100 watchers objective : 31 left.

Did see the demon. Checked the gallery. Totally approved.

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DAKGER [2018-07-23 03:56:53 +0000 UTC]

Yay! Happy birthday!

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RaynaOfTheDead [2018-02-02 19:29:15 +0000 UTC]

I clicked on your profile cus I love your profile pic and I have to say you have a beautiful gallery!

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MrSigardTheGreatest [2018-01-14 00:59:12 +0000 UTC]

DO YOU KNO DA WEY?

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Arpiniko [2017-11-28 13:06:47 +0000 UTC]

thank you for the fave!! ^W^

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RosewoodWonder [2017-10-22 03:41:12 +0000 UTC]

Thanks for the fav ^^

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Reremonkey517 [2017-10-15 22:45:33 +0000 UTC]

WHERE are your WATCHERS?! ;^;

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RespicePostTe [2017-10-10 20:26:22 +0000 UTC]

Thanks for the watch!

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TheBlackHorned [2017-09-12 14:26:40 +0000 UTC]

Much appreciated for the favourite! 

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Haachisan [2017-09-09 10:12:50 +0000 UTC]

thanks for the fav  

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RockieTheWolf25 [2017-09-02 22:30:28 +0000 UTC]

thanks for the fave

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Reremonkey517 [2017-09-02 01:04:09 +0000 UTC]

madamemg , thanks for the watch. I honestly don't know how I wasn't watching you! I literally just found out! 

im sorry    

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Reremonkey517 [2017-09-02 00:48:43 +0000 UTC]

<3

 

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Giraffe-Bazooka [2017-09-02 00:25:17 +0000 UTC]

Thanking you for the watch fellow human

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Reremonkey517 [2017-09-01 22:46:12 +0000 UTC]

I just wanna ask, do you have DA on mobile or on a computer??   

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TakaTheSquirrel [2017-09-01 21:08:28 +0000 UTC]

Oh My Goodness!  I have deviantart connected to my phone notifications and it went off with new ones for 5 whole minutes!   Thank you so so very much for all of the favs!  I'm so happy you like my art!    

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RosewoodWonder [2017-09-01 02:19:38 +0000 UTC]

Thanks for all the faves and the watch ^^

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