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Misperception
♀️
[25401335]
[2013-01-28 21:23:19 +0000 UTC]
(United States)
# Statistics
Favourites: 768; Deviations: 38; Watchers: 13
Watching: 62; Pageviews: 4360; Comments Made: 385; Friends: 62
# About me
Wow. It's literally been years since I updated this. Like, five. Uhh, still in California, still wish I never had to grow up, still love Kingdom Hearts.I also like poetry, and have written a bit, though I'm a total amateur.
Feel free to send me a note, or even just comment. I don't bite! Usually.
# Comments
Comments: 70
Wait, your last comment on here is from JANUARY! Suddenly i feel very honored to have gotten a fav from you for my poem Full Colour Impressions . I am totally thrilled you liked it. You say you like poetry, so may I be so bold as to suggest another of mine?
Rain
I hope you like it too. In fact, feel free to come check out more of my poetry anytime.
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Happy Birthday Sierra!!! I hope you have a really awesome one
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Well this is suuuuper late but thank you so much!!!♥♥ I know I've been rather MIA, but I hope you've been doing well!
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Welcome^^ I'm doing fine
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To be honest they haven't been super easy lately, but I'm pulling through anyway. That's just how life is sometimes.
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Thanks for favouriting Rainbow Forest 2, not sure why but everyone seems to really like that one, so thank you.
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Super late on this but no problem! You're a fantastic artist, that's why everyone loves it, haha.♥
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Late on this, but no prob'.
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Right. I "decided to kill you," yet you refuse to tell me what I've done wrong. Your manipulative tendencies won't work on me. I'm not so naive.
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Manipulative? Said the person whom I did nothing but help, whom abandoned me, whom lashed out at me while I am in the lowest point of my life while claiming to care about me but instead only made things worse, then pretended her faults were MY fault, as if I were her. How dare you even insinuate I was anything short of amazing, kind, compassionate, and spectacular.
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Don't act all heroic, we helped each OTHER, back before you became vicious and cruel. I never "lashed out at you" until today, when you accused me of being Ashley's agent and some other vague stuff that you won't explain, and when you continuously lied. You may have been kind and compassionate back then, but you aren't anymore, and at the end of the day, that's no one's fault but your own. Your reactions to others are one of the few things you can control in life, so you have no one to blame but yourself.
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thank you for the watch !
www.facebook.com/Lamuserienet/
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Thank you so much for the watch
if you want, followme also on
www.youtube.com/watch?v=0xBF1h…
and www.facebook.com/Cristiano-Rei…
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You're welcome! I subscribed to your Youtube!
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Thank you so much for the watch! I really appreciate it and I'm glad you like my artwork
If you'd like, feel free to check out my YouTube , Twitch , Twitter , or Facebook .
If you want more content and tutorials, consider visiting my Patreon page
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No problem at all! Sorry it took me so long to respond, ahaha. Your artwork is awesome! And I subscribed to your Youtube!
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No worries! And thank you x3
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Oh wow! One more precious llama in my team! Thank you!
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Thank you for the watch!!! I really appreciate it!
I have to say, your writing is phenomenal, I love the flow of your work
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No problem, and thank you so much!! Both for your kind words and for all the faves. I'm truly glad that you enjoy my writing.♥
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Wow, your poetry/writing is so beautiful and a breath of fresh air (so genuine and personal)! I haven't had such an enjoyable read in a long time, just truly and utterly remarkable. You have such an incredible future as a writer!
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This comment seriously made my day. Thank you SO MUCH for your kind words and I am honestly honored that you feel that way! I'll definitely keep writing and I am really, really glad you enjoy reading my poems.♥
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Thank you so much for favouriting a bunch of my art.
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No problem! Thank YOU for sharing it. You have a beautiful and unique style.♥
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Aww, thank you so much.
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Hi, I wanted to thank you for faving "before God, unashamed" and if I may ask, what was it that you liked about this poem?
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It reminded me of something that I've been forgetting, even avoiding, and it made me feel a bit better... and a bit worse. I want to come back to it sometime in the far future.
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I understand that conflict. Many of my spiritual poems and songs lately represent that conflict between those choices that lead to shame and how the blood of Jesus is able to cleanse my conscience and by abiding in Him, I can actually choose instead to live a life of holiness and stand before God unashamed. Shame is suffocating and I've been units choke hold time and again, but there is such freedom in confessing my sins and abiding in Jesus and being able to be the righteousness of God in Him. It's challenging and convicting, but full of peace and freedom and joy.
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You're right about all of that, and it really is challenging. I think the hardest thing for me is when I give people certain expectations and then I decide to change them. I don't want people to think I'm flaky, wishy-washy, or untrustworthy in who I am, nor do I want to appear fake. However, it can be difficult once you give out a certain image and then go "Oh, just kidding, I'm actually not into that." I kind of just want a new start where I can go and be a Christian outwardly without people questioning me. I also don't want to give God a bad name by saying I'm a Christian but also doing things that could be considered sinful. So yeah, it really is a struggle, and sin is so very tempting. It lures you in every time and seems so wonderfully enticing at first, before you're so deep in that you finally realize that it's gross and you just want out.
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I grew up Catholic so after I came to Jesus, first became a Christian, and began reading the Bible, not just a verse here or there like they read in Catholic mass, but entire books, I came across the book of Romans and I came to chapter 7 (I'm going to start in verse 5 and quote it through the end of the chapter). It was all entirely new to me, but I remember in particular the first time I read these words:
For when we were in the flesh, the sinful passions which were aroused by the law were at work in our members to bear fruit to death. But now we have been delivered from the law, having died to what we were held by, so that we should serve in the newness of the Spirit and not in the oldness of the letter. (those particular two verses were so over my head the first time I read this chapter that at the time, I couldn't even comprehend them so I just read right over them, but when I got into the next verses I began to agree that what Paul described was exactly my problem). What shall we say then? is the law sin? Certainly not! On the contrary, I would not have known sin except through the law. For I would not have known covetousness unless the law had said "You shall not covet." But sin, taking opportunity by the commandment, produced in me all manner of evil desire. For apart from the law sin was dead. I was alive once without the law, but when the commandment came, sin revived and I died. For sin, taking occasion by the commandment deceived me, and by it killed me. (Being raised as a Catholic and attending Catholic school from Kindergarten to fifth grade, I was very familiar with the ten commandments and so I knew of the law, and knew that God was just and holy and knew His law to be the same.) Therefore the law is holy, and the commandment holy and just and good. Has then what is good become death to me? Certainly not! But sin, that it might appear sin, was producing death in me through what is good, so that sin through the commandment might become exceedingly sinful. For we know that the law is spiritual, but I am carnal, sold under sin. For what I am doing, I do not understand. For what I will to do, that I do not practice; but what I hate, that I do. (I completely related to this.) If, then, I do what I will not to do, I agree with the law that it is good. But now, it is no longer I who do it, but sin that dwells in me. (I think there's a time when you sin because you want to, but then there also comes a time when you want to stop sinning and keep God's law and when you try you find you just can't. When I was a Catholic, I remember how I used to hit my brother and sister as a form of vigilante 'discipline' and I would confess this over and over in the confessional and so the priest would tell me to say so many Our Father's and so many Hail Mary's and I'd dutifully do so, but then even though I wanted to be a better sister, I found myself going back out and hitting my siblings again and at first I hit them because I felt they deserved to be punished, but when I wanted to stop hitting them I found I couldn't and was devastated and saw the futility of saying Our Father's and Hail Mary's because it never solved the key issue which is that sin dwelled within me. I was being controlled by my flesh and even if I tried to keep the law I couldn't.) For I know that in me, that is, in my flesh, nothing good dwells; for to will is present with me, but HOW to perform what is good I do not find. (I really believe your struggle isn't just that you want to keep people's expectations. Because you know that people have all sinned and fallen short of the glory of God so they have no right at all to expect of you that you stop sinning completely or to judge you for sins they've themselves committed, as Jesus said to the Jews who brought to Him the woman who they caught in the very act of adultery, "you who are without sin, cast the first stone." Each of their consciences convicted them and they dropped their stones and went away. None of them condemned her for her sins when they honestly looked at their own sins. And Jesus said those words that bring comfort as well as command "neither do I condemn you, go and sin no more." God's law and these very words set the expectation that you refer to. Back before I knew God, I thought of Him as a judge with standards so high it was impossible for me to even dream of keeping them. But the law cannot give us what we need to keep it. Instead, it shows us what miserable failures we all are. And this is the dilemma Paul here writes of.) For the good I will to do, I do not do; but the evil I will not to do, that I practice. Now if I do what I will not to do, it is no longer I who do it, but sin that dwells in me. But I see another law in my members, warring against the law of my mind, and bringing me into captivity to the law of sin which is in my members. O wretched man that I am! Who will deliver me from this body of death? (I actually remember thinking here, "YES, WHO? WHO??") thank God -through Jesus Christ our Lord!
Fittingly when you realize this, it is the beginning of a whole new chapter that starts out "There is therefore now no condemnation to those who are in Christ Jesus, who do not walk accourding to the flesh, but according to the Spirit. For the law of the Spirit of life in Christ Jesus has made me free from the law of sin and death. For what the law could not do in that it was weak through the flesh, God did by sending His own Son in the likeness of sinful flesh, on account of sin: He condemned sin in the flesh, that the righteous requirement of the law might be fulfilled in us who do not walk according to the flesh but according to the Spirit." -Romans 8:1-5.
You can be free of the things you mention. We have this part of us known as "the flesh" aka "our sinful nature," "the body of death." We inherited it through Adam. It has been controlling humans since the day Adam fell. We see it at work in Cain, in Esau, in Saul, in David when he fell with Bathsheba. We see it at work in the Pharisees a lot, especially when they were seeking to push Jesus off a cliff and handed Him over to Pilate because of envy, which envy itself is contrary to love. In the flesh, in the human nature apart from God, nothing good dwells. But God's solution is that He sends something good to dwell in you and that is His holy Spirit. Romans 8 goes on to say in verses 9-15 "But you are not in the flesh, but in the Spirit if indeed the Spirit of God dwells in you. Now if anyone does not have the Spirit of Christ, he is not His. (and remember, all, and I mean all, you have to do to receive God's Spirit if you haven't already is ask. Jesus even talked about this by saying that "if you being evil give good gifts to your children, how much more will God give the Spirit to those who ask Him?") And if Christ is in you, the body is dead because of sin, but the Spirit is life because of righteousness. But if the Spirit of Him who raised Jesus from the dead dwells in you, He who raised Christ from the dead will also give life to your mortal bodies through His Spirit who dwells in you. Therefore, brethren, we are debtors -not to the flesh, to live according to the flesh. For if you live according to the flesh, you will die, but if by the Spirit you put to death the deeds of the body, you will live. For as many as are led by the Spirit of God, these are the sons of God. For you did not receive the spirit of bondage again to fear, but you received the Spirit of adoption by whom we cry out 'Abba, Father.' (And this is a revelation His Spirit gives you, that God has chosen to adopt you to Himself through Jesus Christ and become your actual Father. That's the ironic thing, I said "our Fathers" more times than I can count, yet in my heart, I knew God as judge, not as Father. One of my favorite sayings of Jesus is "For the Father Himself loves you because You have loved Me and believe I came forth from God." Do you believe Jesus came forth from God? If so... the Father Himself loves you, and you can be assured of that! The new start you long for is found in just coming to Jesus, and believing that when "He died for your sins, He also crucified your flesh, your old nature on that cross" and walking in the reality of that by faith. Walk in the newness of the life of the Spirit. It is by walking in this way that you mortify the deeds of your flesh. I would suggest reading Romans 5 through 8 and asking the Holy Spirit to open these verses to you. And don't worry about giving God a bad name. Jesus has given you His own name and His own authority and His very Spirit to live a righteous and holy life. And if you do sin, you have an advocate with the Father, Jesus Christ Himself! It says in Romans 8:34 "Who is he who condemns? It is Christ who died, and furthermore is also risen, who is even at the right hand of God, who also makes intercession for us." Even if you do sin as a Christian, and even if people condemn you for it, remember "who are they, who are they to condemn me?" Just like the woman caught in adultery, none of the men who would condemn you are without sin, and neither does Jesus condemn you! And He's made a way for you to "go and sin no more" not in your own strength, because we see how we cannot perform the righteousness we desire to do by the strength we posses apart from God, but in the strength of God's own indwelling, Holy Spirit!
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Happy birthday! May it be a day of perfect weather and joyful bliss! One you'll enjoy to often offer reminisce.
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Thank you! I'm going to have to be honest; my last birthday was actually my absolute worst. However, I plan for this upcoming one to be much better! And it's really sweet of you to notice and to wish me a happy birthday.
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I'm back! I looked briefly at your profile and things don't seem to be going too well... I'm not certain I understand everything that's happening, but I hope to reconnect with you soon.
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Thank you for looking at "IDENTITY" and for your comment. I read some of your work, and, thank you for courage in offering it.
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You're welcome. And... thank you for that compliment. I'll admit, it was a little bit difficult at first, putting my work on here, but if someone can relate and feel better understood by it, feel like they're not alone, then it's absolutely worth it. I'm actually in admiration of YOUR courage; what you posted, I don't know if I ever could, whether it was a personal experience or not.
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It was personal, and, like you, it is here so that maybe someone else might know they are not alone.
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I'm... very sorry to hear that it was. But thank you, for being brave and strong enough to share it.
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Thank you so much for the watch Misperception, it means a great deal to me and is a big help.
Thanks for the llama aswell, I'll be sure to food and groom it.
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