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| R10tPol1ce
R10tPol1ce
βοΈ
[18657818]
[2011-08-15 00:16:48 +0000 UTC]
"in a world where horses can talk"
(United States)
# Statistics
Favourites: 51; Deviations: 13; Watchers: 9
Watching: 9; Pageviews: 6451; Comments Made: 807; Friends: 9
# Interests
Favorite movies: Armageddon, The Lion King, The MatrixFavorite TV shows: South Park, Futurama, The Colbert Report, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic
Favorite bands / musical artists: Rammstein, Eminem, Marilyn Manson, Rob Zombie
Favorite books: Halo: The Fall of Reach, Halo: First Strike, Halo: Ghosts of Onyx, any of the Harry Potter books
Favorite writers: Eric Nylund, Mark Twain, Ernest Hemingway
Favorite games: Half-Life, Starcraft, Halo, Call of Duty, The Elder Scrolls, Fallout, Mass Effect
Favorite gaming platform: Xbox 360 and PC
Tools of the Trade: My windows 7 laptop and my iphone.
Other Interests: Going to small towns and pretending I'm a city slicker, and going to big cities and pretending I'm a farm boy
# Comments
Comments: 48
Thank you, whoever you are!
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You're welcome
God bless you
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Why don't you reply to my note? You don't like me? :C
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What the fuck did you just fucking say about my cooking, you little bitch? I'll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Culinary Institute of America, and I've been involved in numerous iron chef challenges, and I have over 300 confirmed recipes for CrΓ©me fraiche. I am trained in Habachi and I'm the top cook at my local Japanese Steak House. I will feed you with culinary skills the likes of which have never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with serving cold fries to me over at McDonalds? Think again, chef. As we cook, I am contacting my secret network of bakers across the US and your ingredient sources are being traced right now. So you better prepare for the repossesing, maggot. The repossesing that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your kitchen. You're fucking smoked, kid. I can cook anything, anytime and dice you in over 700 ways, and that's just with my spatula. Not only am I extensively trained in ragΓΉ alla bolognese, but I have access to the entire spices of the United States Starbucks Corps. And I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable dish of the continent, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your extra "spicy" dal makhini was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would've held your fucking spoon. But you couldn't, you didn't, and now you're wasting the chickpea, you goddamn idiot. I will frost cupcakes all over you, and you will drown in it. You're fucking smoked, kiddo.
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[link]
it looks like shes about to eat the link
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Oh yeah, sure that's what you were doing. That's why you oh so gleefully asked "Were there any versions where more than just an *attempted* tentacle-rape of Lilpip took place?"
If you don't want to get called out for acting like a desperate, perverted creep then keep your tentacle-rape fantasies to yourself and stop trying to get Kkat to write clop-fic for you.
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There were no Goddesses! There couldnβt be for what I was seeing to be allowed to exist.
The⦠thing that shuffled down the hall before me had clearly once been meant to be a pony. There was enough pony left in its face to tell that horrifying truth. There was no way to describe the vile, sickening body of the thing -- the best my brain could manage was the idea that a pony had started to melt, losing all her fur and keeping only sporatic tuffs of her mane and tail, only for the flesh beneath to stop melting (arbitrarily and not all at once) and then begin to bloat and metastasize. Its eyes, sunken and huge and red, stared into mine. Its tongue had swollen and stretched, bursting out of its muzzle and splitting into tendrils as they hung down from the wreckage that had once been its mouth. The tentacles writhed individually, as if in great pain.
I was petrified by the sight, rooted to the floor with no ability or will to move. I wanted to run screaming as that split tongue undulated and whipped out, stretching the length of the hall, each wrapping wetly around one of my hooves. I fell, dragged forward towards the squirming flesh-blob, my gaze locked onto its eyes. I tried again to scream, but somehow it had stolen my voice.
The tongues lifted me over the mass of writhing, furless tissue. As another tongue-tentacle pushed out of its muzzle, the tentacles twisted me over, my eyes turned to the ceiling, and my paralysis broke. I thrashed, letting out a scream of terror.
The tongues were impossibly strong. I could not pull my hooves free. It continued to rotate me until I faced away from it, the hallway behind me upside-down. I witnessed Xenith dash out of the room to save me⦠then stop, eyes wide and locked in place.
I felt that new tongue slither across me, and I realized with abject terror that the flesh-blob did not intend to kill meβ¦
βNO!β I screamed in a mix of fury and primal panic. βNOnonoβ BLAM!! βnononoβ BLAM!! βnononono!!!β BLAM!! My screams were punctuated by the fury of Little Macintosh as I made my weapon fire blindly into the mass of living flesh.
I was hit by a cloying reek. I felt the tongues go slack, dropping me. I hit the creature -- its body felt like a warm and slimy bean-bag chair with grotesque muscle and sinew hidden beneath -- and bounced onto the floor. I scrambled away. I felt sickened, loathing my body where I had touched it.
βOh Littlepip, Iβm so sorry,β Xenith cried out, galloping up to me.
I got shakily to my hooves. Little Macintoshβs bullets had torn gaping holes in the meat of the thing. βW-w-what is t-that?!β
βI do not know,β Xenith said fearfully. βBut we must be cautious. There may be more of them, and they possess a Stare.β
- Excerpt from Chapter 31 of Fallout: Equestria by Kkat [link]
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I'd point out the difference between an dramatic combat scene where rape is threatened and a sexual rape scene, but you already know that judging from your own words: "Were there any versions where more than just an *attempted* tentacle-rape of Lilpip took place?" Emphasis, amusingly, was yours.
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Oh, I'm so sorry I asked another author a question about his My Little Pony fanfiction. I'll make sure to hold my fucking tongue from now on because I don't want people to think I'm not cool!
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Hello, mate! I wanted to tell you that your surname sounds a lot like it has Polish roots, even my surname ends with -ski.
And the second thing is a request, or two requests, actually. To begin with, could you proof-read the first chapter when I'm done in search for grammar mistakes, misspellings, incorrect use of words and matter like that? I'd greatly appreciate it! And the second thing, can you think of a very long, redundantly sophisticated insult aimed at Celestia? I do believe I'm going to need it, and who's the king of redundantly sophisticated words if not you?
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Hey, yeah, I think I'm Polish-English... maybe some German... I don't know, but yeah, there's some Polish in me, lol.
I know the first chapter is terrible, and all I've done is rewrite the single worst paragraph, but the whole thing probably needs to be completely rewritten. I'm going to give the whole story a good polishing (not that kind of polish, lol) when I finish it this summer. And, yeah, I haven't been updating my DA because I've been busy with school, but I've got the last three chapters worked out in my head, and I'm going to finish this thing before the start of next semester in the fall.
I'll have to think about the Celestia insult though. How could I possibly say anything negative about Little Miss Sunshine herself?
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Uh, oh, eh, uh. Actually i meant if you could proof-read chapter of my upcoming fanfic. When I'm done with proof-reading it by myself. Y' know, because you're a student writer, you're a native English speaker, and you keep using redundantly sophisticated words, so you should be able to do it.
And you'll see. That inter-racial racist will get pwndlolnub. And you're going to insult her! (open a portal, tell her who made that insult, instant profit).
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Yeah, I'd be glad to proofread your fanfic! ^_^ Send me a link!
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*blink* *blink*
Oh yeah, maybe I should write it first...
Well, I've got the first three paragraphs. That's a lot, is it not?
Wait, how many paragraphs does your story...
Nevermind, I'm working on it, actually I just wanted to be sure that there's someone that would tell me what's wrong before I post it, so I won't post a poorly-written shitty-plotted story instead of R10tPol1ce-level-grammar shitty-plotted story. Thanks in advance!
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*goes to unfriend you*
Oh wait, this is Deviantart.
*goes to report you*
...
jklol
If we work together and never give up, perhaps one day your fanfiction will be as terrible as mine!
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Was the sentence about your fanfic being terrible meant to make me say that it is awesome? Even if it is, I'll be honest and still say that your fanfic is awesome. But, if I were writing your story, it'd contain BattleMechs, Half - Life Opposing Force Displacement Cannon, and lots of other FUCKED UP SHIT MOTHERFUCKER. Back to normal now.
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I don't know what I was trying to make you do or say or think, I can't keep up with kids these days.
Good luck on your fanfic, and I'd be more than happy to help proofread!
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"I don't know what I was trying to make you do or say or think, I can't keep up with kids these days."
Insta-Daishi-embark-and-running-to-destroy-you.
Age is really irrelevant. No one I know, even people older than me, can't speak English as good as I do. Only my same-aged friend does. And I'm in a fucking "double language" class where there's pressure put on languages, and even if my classmates are going on additional-fucking-lessions, they can't keep up with me. Then don't call me a kid, or make my age change anything. This is on my list of most-hated things. The fact that you're using computer to contact me alone proves that you can in fact keep up with "kids".
*reads first part of second sentence* Thank you very much! *reads second part* and, well, thank you again!
And by the way, I've read my first comment and I think you got me wrong.
"I won't post a poorly-written shitty-plotted story instead of R10tPol1ce-level-grammar shitty-plotted story. Thanks in advance!"
I didn't meant that your story is shitty-plotted, it's just a remnant of "poorly-written shitty-plotted", because now when I think about it, it could be gotten wrong. That's it.
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Hey, I always forget to ask you for something - tell me about yourself!
And about the fic - why won't you put it on FiMFiction.com? You'll surely get a lot of comments and more watchers. And if you won't do that, give a link to your dA page in the next chapter - similar results will ensue, I guess!
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Well, I'll use my patented system to answer to all things you've said!
Why don't you like FiMFiction? It have got tracking, favouriting, and a big community that'll make sure that you get comments from 15 people, maybe more than that!
You don't keep forgetting to thank me, you did it last time. And when I saw the βHey, I'm R10tPol1ce and I made this story just for you!β, read it and found out that it has limitlessssss... potential, I decided to find you and so I did. You're kind and nice, so when you asked me for a critique on the newest chapter I did so.
About the rising action, climax, falling action and denouement (what kind of word is that, anyway?), when have you read an article stating that a story should have 4-5 parts? I've seen it already, and when I'm so bored that I could write a story... I'll do so.
Don't you lie to me that you're white and you're a man! I know all about you, I just asked you so I could test if you'd lie to me or not!
Mexican food = food of god!
I'm 14 year old secondary school βstudentβ and underage resident of MysΕowice, ΕlΔ
skie, Poland, Europe, Earth, Milky Way, The Universe. I'm white, male, I have adolescence acne, my eye's color's blue, my hair's black, I like parkour-like stuff, but unfortunately my both knees, after lots of jumping, have got some damage and for now I have to limit βparkouringβ.
My religion is roman Catholicism as well, although I have moments when I lose my faith.
I could say that I'm an βintermediateβ speaker of German, but it'd be a lie. I'm learning it for 8 school years (6 years of primary school, one and a half of secondary school), my roommate is my sister which I genuinely hate (reasons are too long and I'd like not to share that). I'm a brony since late 2011 June, and since then I've made 4 of my friends bronies as well. It may feel weird to someone that never been to Poland, but I snuff tobacco and I've already had my alcoholic initiation. I'm addicted to gaming, snuffing, reading, not-sleeping-between-Saturday-and-Sunday-to-watch-the-newest-episode-and-catch-on-pony-stuff. Thank you for caring!
And also, I'll surely give my feedback to all incoming chapters!
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Hi,
Rising action, climax, denouement (some darn French word) - those are the traditional "elements of plot" , and you know the kind of plot I mean : p
Not surprised about the alcohol, but the tobacco concerns me, as every single tobacco product in my country is emblazoned with a gigantic sticker that says "WARNING: IF YOU USE THIS, YOU WILL GET CANCER AND DIE", soooo... I don't want you to die, ktoosiek!
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I know about these "elements of PLOT" HEHEHEHEHEHEHEHE~
Seriously now, studies have shown that snuffing tobacco doesn't cause a bigger chance of developing cancer or anything. And it's not like I take a cigarette, rip out all tobacco and snuff it. Here:
It is generally insufflated (inhaled) or "snuffed" through the nose either directly from the fingers or by using specially made "snuffing" devices.
Snuff is usually scented or flavoured. Typical flavours are floral, mentholated (also called 'medicated'), fruit, and spice, either pure or in blends. Other common flavours include Camphor, Cinnamon, Rose and Spearmint. Modern flavours include Bourbon, Cherry, Cola and Whisky.
That's what I snuff. And I'm not going to die, by the way. PATHETIC CANCER CAN'T EVEN HARM ME!
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When I saw that chapter 6 is released I was like AAAAWWWW YEAH!
FINALLY!
I can't wait to read it /)^3^(\
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Hello there! I just wanted to tell you some things:
- your fanfic is awesome
- just try to put some sex scenes in it and I will rip your balls and insert them in your nose
- I AM FUCKING SERIOUS, you could have put some secks if it were a normal story, not poni one
And thank you for your well-done job, except FUCKING PONI PUSSIES THAT SHOULD NOT BE FUCKING MENTIONED. When is the next chapter going to come?
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Also, next chapter, "A Different Kind of Evil", should be done around the end of this month.
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Confound you, you've made me play HL and HL2 again!
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When I read your comment, I was like [link]
Don't worry, there won't be any [link] in my My Little Pony fanfiction.
Unless you are offended by snuggling and some tastefully-handled cuddling.
It's gonna get PG in here, bitch.
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"It looked like a giant pair of red lips that were trying to kiss a particularly squeamish, black furry centipede."
"(...)I caught the devious little spectacle-snatcher by her slippery hind legs.)
...seriously!
I'm not offended by reasons you've said, I'm offended by that. I guess it's just my opinion but yeah, detailed or "tasteful", like you would have said, aren't needed. And you don't have to always use "cuddling" as a swear, "bucking" is very popular and fitting as well.
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Oh, I think I understand now. When I said "A pair of giant red lips" I was talking about her ass (which was covered in blood, due to her sitting down in a giant puddle of blood), not her genitalia. I guess that was lost in translation! Sorry about that!
And, Alyx's legs were slippery because she had just gone swimming in a river. I didn't mean anything... dear Lord, what did you think I was talking about?
However, when Gordon said that he was "horny" I indeed meant that he wanted to satisfy his carnal, animalistic desire to share a special hug with a girl pony.
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Fuck my mind then. Too much perverted ASSociation in my school... Well, you still meant her ass and I'm not sure if it was needed. Anyway, your fanfic - your choice.
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Thank you, sir, for making my day. XD
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Me: *[link]
I don't want to be intrusive, but you said that the next chapter's going to be released around the end for this month. It's February now and there's still no Ballad
Me: *[link]
deviantART muro drawing
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Episode 6 of my My Little Pony fanfiction has been delayed until "Holiday 2004" due to a Microsoft Word source code distributable that was leaked to various popular internet Peer-to-Peer filesharing websites on the World Wide Web.
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Hey, darling, do you know what are we going to celebrate soon? Our one month BALLad-release-delay day! How are you?
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I am just spectacular. I just got a tax refund from the United States government to the tune of [REDACTED], and I fully intend to piddle that money away in a variety of foolish ways.
And I solemnly vow that you will wake up tomorrow morning with a very, very stupid video from ASDFUIL, as one of the things I did with my ill-gotten gains was buy Sony Vegas! :3
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It seems like someone've read some SCP's.
Well, I guess you're just tricking me and you're going to spend that money on finding my real adress, flying here and delivering this video in person.
Wait, I'm probably high. I congratulate you on receiving your dosh, SPEND IT WISELY DAMMIT!
Waiting to see that video. And if you're going to do more videos in GMod, please use cl_drawhud 0. Makes everything better'n'stuff.
That's all, sorry again for my incoherent way of speaking. I still hope you can understand me, though!
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