KaidokJ [2017-11-30 00:20:11 +0000 UTC]

Thank you for choosing AbsurdAir, your captain for this flight is KaidokJ . I have no license, I’m considered legally blind and I’m easily distrac… Wait, what was I talking about…

But not to fear. There’s a good chance we’ll never make our destination, but since this whole flight metaphor is just a weak attempt at a humorous anecdote, I don’t think that’s going to be a problem. Ah damn, I just shattered the illusion by crashing through the 4th wall.

Anyway, thanks for the watch.

I’m sure you regret your choice by now, considering this madness is basically what you signed up for, but since all tickets are non-refundable, welcome to Crazytown. Quarantine measures come into effect upon arrival.  

On a more serious note, here’s basically the run down. Posting regularly (fingers crossed), free funny stories in almost all fav replies, and an intro to Kevin the Llama in the Llama Badge reply. Also, if you haven’t already heard, I’ve been designated Kevin Llamason’s official biographer, so you can check out what he’s been up to in The Kevin Chronicles . (Unfortunately “The Kevin Chronicles” are currently on hiatus, while Kevin gets a handle on his pinecone addiction. In the meantime I hope to experiment with a new format in the near future, so keep an eye out for that)

So that’s about it. Thanks again for flying AbsurdAir, and I hope you enjoy the ride.  

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KaidokJ [2017-11-30 00:19:48 +0000 UTC]

Thanks for the fav on DS#63 - You've got something on your face...

No one really knows where these creatures come from, but ever since my second cousin’s barber’s youngest nephew, Larry, opened a portal to the unfathomable void, these things have been showing up. I hear he was attempting to summon the Great Overlord Cthulhu, you know just to shoot the breeze, but no one has heard from him in a while, so there’s no way to be sure. It’s probably a coincidence, but still, I’m keeping my distance. I know they appear quite cute and harmless but the incidence of intense headaches and skull splitting ear birth has increase dramatically since their arrival. People don’t seem to have made a connection, but I still say it’s very suspicious.

- ParanoidEarplugSalesman

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KaidokJ [2017-11-30 00:17:17 +0000 UTC]

Thanks for the fav on 123 - Styles, they are a changing...

I don’t often get accused of having style, and in the unlikely event that it does happen, I make a point of promptly correcting them. Usually in the form of interpretive dance. So impressive are my skills that I only ever make it half way through my routine before my accusers slink off to contemplate their rash judgements. Interpretive dance also works as a practical argumentative technique when dealing with unsolicited solicitors, long lines at the DMV, and lively bar room discussions. You’ve never experienced a truly sophisticated debate until you’ve witnessed two uninhibited, coordination challenged, arrhythmic men, twirl and thrust at each other in the middle of a crowded bar. Now that is what I call the height of cultural discourse. Fair warning, though. Interpretive dance does not work so well when dealing with the IRS. They’re roller disco counter argument is intimidatingly superior and no amount of physical interpretation, no matter how avant-garde, can match it. 

#LeotardsForLife

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gigi50 [2017-11-23 15:22:21 +0000 UTC]

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MRATV [2017-11-11 15:21:23 +0000 UTC]

your style is so cute omfg

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