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| vampire1317
vampire1317
♂️
[7534876]
[2008-06-09 03:34:16 +0000 UTC]
"to capture emotion on paper..."
(United States)
# Statistics
Favourites: 916; Deviations: 42; Watchers: 55
Watching: 88; Pageviews: 13754; Comments Made: 2248; Friends: 88
# Interests
Favorite visual artist: almightyrayFavorite movies: nightmare before christmas, Avatar, Trueasure Planet, Titan A.E.,
Favorite bands / musical artists: too much to name, no really there is
Favorite books: again too much to name
Favorite writers: i will get those when i remember/have the time
Favorite games: Mass Effect, Bioshock, Conduit, any shootim' up
Favorite gaming platform: Xbox 360 (i think that's what it's askin)
Tools of the Trade: pencil, pen, my mind
Other Interests: paintballing/airsofting, reading, writing
# About me
Current Residence: worlds that i made that have yet to be written downdeviantWEAR sizing preference: haven't taken the time to check yet
Favourite genre of music: almost all
Favourite style of art: surreal
Wallpaper of choice: crusnik 80%, Avatar, any Mass Effect
Personal Quote: i would have been your daddy BTDBMOTF
# Comments
Comments: 627
Happy Birthday Vamp! I hope you have a great day!!!
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Sorry haven't gotten on in a long while. Thank you 
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Oh! And if you do get a commission artwork for Vikk and Garrus, let me know. lol I wanna see it.
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Vikk is doing good. She's been kind of depressed recently. And so have I, unfortunately. But I don't think you would want to know that part about me. Vikk tries to find new things to keep her happy. But she's been struggling from time to time. I actually drew Vikk in a random picture I did in case you wanna see.
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I would love to see it. Vikk miss garrus?
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Vikk is at the bottom left corner. And Vikk kinda misses garrus. But she has a krogan now to protect her.
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I don't know about you but Vikk has gotten so much hotter. I think I'm going to commission a art piece with her and garrus. Also garrus misses her.
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xD Well I do plan on drawing a more improved version of her eventually. Vikk has been wondering how Garrus has been. And just a reminder, I am married sooo yeah. lol So if you wanna wait until I get a pic of Vikk then wait.
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I know you are married but Vikk isn't, as far as I know. And yes I will let you know about the commission
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x3 This is true, Vikk really isn't married to anyone. She's been kinda in hiding recently.
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Why? Can garrus do anything to bring here back out?
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She's been kinda fearful of people recently, like her security blanket is missing. She would like some company, not in a dirty way though. She's been kind of fearful of men. Like, she thinks that people are out to get her again.
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Why would she think people are out to get her? She may think the dirty way isn't good but that's when garrus feels like everything is going to be alright. The security of it. What's scaring her about men again?
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The way men will use her. And how she has that fear of people don't really like her. Like no one really means what they say and that they really don't care. That's the fear she's been having recently. And Vikk's been scared to really tell anyone about it. Even the ones she cares for.
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But what is bringing on this fear?
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flashbacks to the past. From when she was experimented on. And how they treated her. They're coming back and the nightmares are haunting her. Tormenting her thoughts.
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So garrus is tormenting her?
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Not that past. The past of being alone, and being caged. That past. She still holds on dearly of the ones with Garrus. The only man that she really ever cared for. And the only one that even cared for her.
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What is happening now that is making her feel this way?
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I'm not sure, it just flared up. Like, she was doing okay until, no one would talk to her and then she felt really lonely.. Like she didn't belong. Like in the past where no one really cared for her.. That's when it all started, I guess.
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The crew. They didn't really bother with speaking with her. Not even Tali..
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Who is the crew? Who is Tali?
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o.O from mass effect? remember she was accepted into shepards group? The one that Garrus is in? Or am I thinking of something different?
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No you are talking about the right one. For a little bit there, I thought you were talking metaphor for real life. I was getting worried. So what made the crew stop talking to her?
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ohhh okay okay. Well I was talking about me, and I guess I got confused on that last part. lol So with Vikk being me of course, she was going through work and she got promoted to the booth in a store. But then she got really lonely and depressed since there wasn't really anyone to talk to since she would close every night. And everytime she would see her friends talk and have fun, an empty void grew bigger and bigger. Deeper and deeper with every passing day that would go by. To where she just felt like crying and not really wanting to live. Like depression to the point where she really was convinced that no one would really care if she were to...not exist and just kill herself. So that way she wouldn't have to be a burden. And Vikk didn't think anyone would really care that she would be missing. Not even loved ones..
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Me and garrus would miss you for sure. But I have to ask, vikk working graveyard shift? What time does she clock out?
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Well now she's no longer at the booth. She's now in the Delicatessen. She could work from either ten in the morning to six in the afternoon or from two in the afternoon to ten at night. So now it switches from time to time. Vikk likes it better there, but she still has moments of would really anyone care.. When Vikk was working the booth it would always be from one thirty pm till ten at night or later. And she would be back there by herself and she doesn't really like it. Apparently Vikk's an extrovert. lol
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Me and garrus would have loved to know that a little bit ago.
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Like I said, both Vikk and I didn't think anyone would care at the time.
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Back then the depression never really shown up until now. Vikk wasn't really sad or depressed. Even if she was sad, Vikk would hide it. Not let anyone know she was crying inside. Since Vikk wanted to make everyone else happy and make herself happy last. Vikk's still kind of like that, but now it just hurts trying to make herself happy at times. Vikk really want to be happy and perky again like she normally is, but now it's gotten harder.
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How is her married life? How is her normal life? And last but not least, how is her personal life?
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Married life is going well, she's really enjoying it. Her hubby is giving her plenty of opportunities for cuddle time whenever she's really sad. Vikk actually cried on his shoulder for an hour when she was having a depressed day. Personal life, she thinks that she really shouldn't be around. Cuz Vikk keeps thinking that she's the devil and that no one wants to be around her and they talk behind her back. It's been a fear that Vikk has had for a loooong time. Thanks to a lifetime of being picked on, bullied, abused, pushed around, talked behind, made fun of, the list is endless in her eyes.
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So her hubby isn't helping with any of this?
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He helps once in a while. There will be times where he'll just say he's sorry for how I'm feeling and then go back to gaming. And Vikk doesn't see how that really helps. And he'll only cuddle with her if she asks or if it's in bed sleeping. How Vikk would like for her hubby to do is when she's feeling like that, stop playing the games and then have him take the initiative to actually comfort. And not having to have her start it. Vikk loves to receive the comfort and love, and knowing that someone cares. Vikk likes the physical part where someone can cuddle with her, letting her actually know that everythings okay. Talking to her about it, while they're cuddling.
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Garrus wishes he could be there to help her.
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myeah..All Vikk wants right now is the attention of being comforted. But she might go to the doctor to get diagnosed for depression. Since she knows she has it down the family line. On her mother's side, unfortunately.
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Trust me, garrus wishes he really could be there for her.
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I know. Vikk misses his company. And she misses all the fun escapades they would go on.
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Like the time where Vikk accidentally kissed Garrus. She really liked that. And just traveling the galaxies together.
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All the experiences in between?
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