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| xvendettaxchanx
xvendettaxchanx
[9456205]
[2009-01-22 22:02:29 +0000 UTC]
"Smoke catnip. Hail Lucipurr."
(Spain)
# Statistics
Favourites: 731; Deviations: 13; Watchers: 43
Watching: 93; Pageviews: 13184; Comments Made: 26529; Friends: 93
# Interests
Favorite visual artist: I can't see, I'm deaf.Favorite movies: Phonebooth, Sherlock Holmes, Identity, Real Steel.
Favorite TV shows: Criminal Minds, The Big Bang Theory.
Favorite bands / musical artists: Lots. Want particulars? Ask.
Favorite books: Reading is for squares. I'm a polygon. Wait...
Favorite writers: Eh...
Favorite games: Although I have not yet played it, I wish to play Amnesia, PORTAL~
Favorite gaming platform: my bathtub
Tools of the Trade: A plastic spoon and a forklift.
Other Interests: Psychology, Forensic Profiling, Human Taxidermy, Quidditch, Fun Facts, My Superhero Pajama Pants, Pictures, Jokes, Illusions, Riddles, Mysteries, The Paranormal, Studying Humans for fun, and yada yada yada...
# About me
Satan says we're dangerous, we're trading kids for angel dust.-Jesus Fancy Turkey Jones Christ Christian Hernandez Gonzalez The Third Tres Cuatro Esquire.
- First off, I think we should all face the facts, O.J. killed those people.
- I am a sh'more whore.
- Like a good neighbor, State Farm is there. *sh'more* It's the jingle, yo.
- I have too many nicknames.
- I wanna be the very best, like no on ever was...
- Got A light skinned friend lookin' like Micheal Jackson got dark skinned friend lookin' like Micheal Jackson...
- Woke up this morning, got myself a gun.
- I crash movie theaters for popcorn.
- I am fond of anime and cartoons. 'cause, ya' know, I'm nerdy like that.
- My grammar skills are not perfect, but they're getting better. If only I could pay attention more...
- I have developed a phobia of deep water, small, enclosed spaces, heights (sometimes), and Slender Man. But everybody is afraid of Slender Man.
- Cold and I don't mix.
- I like to fool around with fire. Just for shits and giggles...
- There is a monster eating my skull. It's called my hair.
- I srsly need to brush up on my art. Because quite frankly it's been failing recently.
- I wanna run a morgue. It's even gonna have a snack bar!
- Chocolate is ORGASMIC. (Literally!)
- I shot the sheriff. Ya' caught me, Skippy.
- I take make-up and do funny things with my face. Can you tell?
- Yeah, yeah. I'm short, I get it.
- I like fun and useless facts.
- I blame communism. And the French.
So, need to know more? Not satisfied? Lacking mac and cheese? Well, then ask sucker. But it costs. 50 BUCKS AND A KIT-KAT BAR. And maybe a happy ending. If you're cute... BUT KEEP MY INFO TO YOURSELF! I can't risk having my personal life leaked out into the open! DO YOU REALIZE HOW MANY PEOPLE I OWE!? It's outrageous! So don't tell anyone, fool! If word gets out, I'll have to skip town, go by a new name, gain a few pounds then shed them with deathly amounts of steroids and health drinks, then shave off my hair and sell it on the Black Market for a cheap easy buck. I'll work as a hitman for some Russian guy name Igor. I'll spend my days hunting down Chinese operatives and going undercover as a traveling salesman selling Norwegian water to the innocent citizens of a strange town somewhere deep in North Africa (wtf are the Chinese doing in Africa?), almost get eaten by the native cannibals, fighting them off with my big stick I got from playing a lion warrior in my school play(Tru fax.), and escaping on a private jet plane set by the president to rescue me (That show sux.) Then after I have successfully landed back in the U.S., meeting Igor in D.C., I receive the Purple Heart. Why? I have no fucking idea.... From there I run freely in my birthday suit, using the Purple Heart as a hair pin. As I bask in my naked greatness, I am confronted with a letter given to me by a man is a strange overcoat and a funny hat. It is a warning letter from my long-time foes, Cthulhu, John McCain, and that one Spanish dude across the way. I send my robot army to attack, paying them in yogurt chips (Do those exist?) I continue onward through the lonely streets of D.C., nekkid, awaiting my plane to Britain to visit some friends *cough* Fate... *cough*. The plane arrives with fresh clothing (Aw man!), warm food, and my fancy pipe. I snuggle myself up in front of the fire (This is a fancy plane). The plane lands, and I am offered to appear on late night telly. After my appearance, I begin to get homesick and call for a plane home. Upon my return I get to have an awesome action-packed show down with James Bond at the airport, defeating him with my laser beam charged with Al Gore's tears. After this great event, I will retire peacefully in Mexico with a cabana boy named Raul, move to Bangladesh and give Raul away as an offering, be chased out by angry fisher men, go back to America, survive on beets and cheap 1950's wine whilst living under a rock in the Grand Canyon, with no source of company except the recordings on my cell phone, and patiently wait for the robot take over to ignite, dying in my sleep from my cell phone mutating and eating my neck, giving my body scraps to it's young microchips. And live... die... happily ever after.
Wow, I have too much time on my hands. I need to get out more. Taxi!
This informant's gotta bounce. CATCH YOU ON THE FLIP SIDE HOMIES.
TEAM PROPELLER HAT SUCKERS.
IN ADDITION TO TEAM CATCHER IN THE RYE HAT.
ALSO TEAM KITTY CAP.
Current Residence: Your bathroom closet.
deviantWEAR sizing preference: M
Print preference: hp
Favourite genre of music: Alternative stuff, Rock, Metal, Gabber, Hardstyle Techno, Dubstep.
Favourite photographer: rehpargotohp etiruovraf
Favourite style of art: Anime, Dark Cartoon
Operating System: system operating
MP3 player of choice: 3PM. Well would you look at that...
Shell of choice: choice of shell
Wallpaper of choice: paper of wall
Skin of choice: My skin, silly.
Favourite cartoon character: Space Core
Personal Quote: "Space..." "RIBBIT." 'MOISTURIZE' 'So this one time at band camp.
# Comments
Comments: 8458
[link] CHECK OUT THIS SEXY MOTHERFUCKER RIGHT HERE.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
Unf and it ain't a gold digger like the others...
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
It don't take your money when you in need?
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
Good. That's good.
[link] Also, I don't know why I thought of you when I saw this.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
I think it's because I make that face when I am being photographed.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
Next time you get your picture taken make sure you have your library card.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
"Eva... Eva halp."
"?"
"I think my Sylvari is gon' get raped by the only Sylvari with a virginity"
"What makes you say that?"
"[link] "
"Oh... Oh that is quite the rape face o30"
"AND HE'S NOT PAYING ATTENTION."
"Prepare his anus... /o/"
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
Wow. That rape face is just. Oh wow.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
"Commander, I need to speak with you in my office... privately."
"? Trahearne, you have an office? Do you have a desk and other things like that?"
"Yes... a very durable desk... my scientists assure me that it's capable of holding two full grown Norn men in reverse cowgirl"
"What is that?"
"We'll review that in our private "briefing" later"
"Okay! o/"
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
Get one of those secret spy pens to put on the desk for a critic review.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
It doesn't help that I made Severing all cute and big-eyed and short.
... Aya doesn't help either... apparently Severing is little more than an endless opportunity innuendo well.
"Just wait, you'll get to the last mission and Trahearne will just be standing there like "Commander... it's just the two of us now and I am going to Sever your fate." "
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
*ba-dum chhhh* Ha, that's punny.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
"Oh wow I just noticed that his pistols appear to be leaking fluid ._."
""Trahearne... my "Orrian Pistol" is wet... for you""
":T"
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
"Aye girl. Mind if I, squirtle all over your jigglypuffs?"
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
"I don't see why you're always standing in front of him during these missions... surely the last place you want him to be familiar with is your ass"
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
Apparently Eva sang that entire song with someone on Tumblr in post form.
"Man, I'm glad Trahearne has that sword now instead of me... I did so bad in that quest where I was required to use it that I was stark naked when I finished it... I just imagine Severing walking home back to the Pale Tree with the sword covering his little root and berries."
"That means Trahearne is wielding a blade that has not only seen him naked but has touched him in the most tender of areas"
"Why do you do this..."
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
And then she blames me for shipping these two ;
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
My friend told my ex I was dying. Apparently he freaked out.
"Tyler is freaking out..,"
"Why?"
"I told him you were gonna die next week."
"What?? I meant because I was the turkey and it's Thanksgiving, I don't have a terminal disease or something?"
"Yeah I kinda forgot about that part...;;"
"FUCKING. GENIUS."
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
I need new friends.;;
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
I AM THE BEST FRIEND /o/
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
Well then you and your friends need to be my new friends.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
and we can share friiiiieeendssss
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
If I ever actually meet your friends ;;
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
I don't get to talk to them that much anymore myself... Eva's usually off in her own fantasies, Lamp is doing Lamp things (although he's usually the one I can contact most often) and fuckface doesn't talk to me...
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
Hm... maybe you should play GW2 with the rest of us silly bitches? I mean, Thanny doesn't play but we're very friendly happy folk /o/
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
And we have lots of shenanigans...
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
My luck I'd log on one day high af.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
>Implying that Stef doesn't log in high as fuck all the time
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
"Stef, come on... it's just a jumping puzzle"
"Woah... oAo hexagons..."
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
Sounds familiar...
"Aaliyah, what are you doing? They're train tracks, it's not the end on the world."
"But what if I fall?"
"You couldn't even fit your foot through one of these cracks."
"But what about the broken ones-"
"DO YOU WANT CHOCOLATE FUDGE POPTARTS OR NOT?"
"FUCK THESE TRACKS."
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
"When did the world become HD?"
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
Legit. Noon. Walking on the nigger bridge. Everything is so bright and vibrant. "When the fuck did the universe to a program upgrade?"
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
>smoking in the woods by my friends house
>high af
>lays on the ground.
>"ooooh good lord. This grass is just.... aaaaugh holy orgasmic grass."
You cannot make this shit up.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
Gurl, when I'm high. Shit's cray.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
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