Comments: 23
moonsparked [2004-06-15 11:28:03 +0000 UTC]
'i crave all that you are
(whether sundried, frozen, or tea-stained)'
maybe it's the homelessness, maybe it's the radiohead, maybe it's the open door on the wind, but i'm swept away...
'go on, save it'
the perfect combination of emotions.
+fav.
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undulate [2004-05-29 21:33:09 +0000 UTC]
i'm so in love with the meter of this.
the last line i think could be lost completely and/or revised. it is the only thing out of place in the poem (like a lock of hair that got in someone's eyes for a picture).
"The sun, silently slithering in
(after a long hard night within speckles of your eyes)"
"to be always and forever (black sweater) inspired"
those lines are fucking genius.
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undulate In reply to aprayerforharper [2004-05-29 21:37:26 +0000 UTC]
i wouldn't call it an issue so much as you're so spent by the time you get there that you're more focused on errors and a read through. ^_^
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flat1ine In reply to aprayerforharper [2004-06-04 19:26:39 +0000 UTC]
can i ride shotgun? i dig vegas. and y'all kickass.
[missyou]
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AnonymousScotch [2004-05-29 14:45:29 +0000 UTC]
these poems are well done
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flat1ine [2004-05-28 16:25:36 +0000 UTC]
you break my heart darlin
[iloveiloveilove]
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flat1ine In reply to aprayerforharper [2004-05-28 18:16:29 +0000 UTC]
"something about the buildings in chealsea just kills me"
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aprayerforharper In reply to flat1ine [2004-05-28 18:30:06 +0000 UTC]
"Maybe in a month or two,
Maybe when things are different for me,
Maybe when things are different for you"
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flat1ine In reply to aprayerforharper [2004-05-28 18:43:41 +0000 UTC]
"I never had light in my eyes anyways
Maybe things are different......these days."
you make my days better.
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aprayerforharper In reply to flat1ine [2004-05-28 18:47:01 +0000 UTC]
"I dream I'm in New York City some nights.
Angels flow down from all the buildings
Something about an angel just kills me
I keep hoping something will..."
you kill me (in all the perfect ways)
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lostharmony [2004-05-28 15:52:22 +0000 UTC]
that is wonderfully written. the sun dried, frozen, or tea stained part really sticks out to me, and i love the description on the bed frame.
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