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benr1989 — Accusations.
Published: 2004-01-26 03:47:58 +0000 UTC; Views: 138; Favourites: 1; Downloads: 7
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Description VARIATION #1
_____________

The voices
I hear them, oh so much
Assuring me of a non-existing redemption

One by one,
I'm promised guidance,
They tell me,
Time after time,
All will be fine.

They say they've been there,
They claim to understand,

But nothing knows,
and neither do they,
how this feels,
So how could you?

When I needed you most,
You ran.
When I pleaded for guidance,
You mislead me.
And when I needed hope,
You weren't there.

Drown in my blood,
bled an endless river.
Bathe in my tears,
cried for far too long.

You are the unfaithful.
You shaped me into the shapeless.
You are to blame, as am I,
for trusting you.

Leave me now,
to lie here,
silent and subtle,
from now until the end,
I am forever silent.

Immerse me in the earth,
Surround me with the walls of insecurity, made of dirt.
Cover me in my sins,
throw them on me,
as I have on you.

I am now but one,
in the vast army of hate.
Cast me out on the frontline, unprepared
for the next endurance.



VARIATION #2
_____________

The voices
I hear them, oh so much
Assuring me of a non-existing redemption

One by one,
I'm promised guidance,
They tell me,
Time after time,
All will be fine.

They say they've been there,
They claim to understand,

But nothing knows,
and neither do they,
how this feels,
So how could you?

When I needed you most,
You ran.
When I pleaded for guidance,
You mislead me.
And when I needed hope,
You weren't there.

Drown in my blood,
bled an endless river.
Bathe in my tears,
cried for far too long.

You are the unfaithful.
You shaped me into the shapeless.
You are to blame, as am I,
for trusting you.

Left to lie there,
silent and subtle,
from now until the end,
I will never be at rest.

I continue to fall,
into this river of hate,
more and more,
with every stab, to the tainted heart I bear.

Drowning,
Suffocating,
Dying,
Do not try to save me, anymore.
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Comments: 8

notrust [2004-01-27 01:11:11 +0000 UTC]

I liked both of them, but I suppose the first bariation of it appealed more to me, I'm not exactly sure why...

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

benr1989 In reply to notrust [2004-01-27 05:03:57 +0000 UTC]

yes me too

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DeathbyFire [2004-01-26 20:01:41 +0000 UTC]

This is very interesting. The poems are almost like the poem "Anyone lived in a pretty how town" (think that's it) that u showed me. They can be interpreted as if you are talking about God and/or religion betraying you, or someone else, like a significant person in your life.

Well I like the first one more though, as you said, it seems to stray off from its "purpose" but the ending of the first one has more imagery in the end and I just seem to like it more.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

benr1989 In reply to DeathbyFire [2004-01-26 20:46:09 +0000 UTC]

thanks yeah i like the first more too i thnk

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DeathbyFire In reply to benr1989 [2004-01-26 20:51:12 +0000 UTC]

Finally got my lazy ass to write a good comment lol. Love the poems!!!

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benr1989 [2004-01-26 10:01:27 +0000 UTC]

im a dumbass, the second variation i posted wasnt right, forgot the ending lol,,, fixed it now

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bitchinblack [2004-01-26 07:07:14 +0000 UTC]

I feel that in both, there was too much emphasis on the other person, and not on the speaker. Because in essence, poems like these are about you. But all in all, they are both good.

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benr1989 In reply to bitchinblack [2004-01-26 10:02:57 +0000 UTC]

yeah i know wat u mean, also a huge purpose of this poem [perhaps even more than the obvious one of betrayal] is its one of them anti-religion poems. Not that i have anything against religion, but as Anton Lavey once said, religion isn't what brings closure to one

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