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blackoberst — Villain

Published: 2003-12-26 11:49:20 +0000 UTC; Views: 652; Favourites: 4; Downloads: 45
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Description I thought I killed you…

I took your head and smashed it,
Picked you up and threw you,
Squeezed you ‘til you gasped,
Your clothes were torn.

Your hair – out the window,
Then burned for assurance,
Your photos in the gutter,
Negatives and all.

Your scent – replaced,
Your smile – contorted,
Your taste – bittered,
Your eyes – forgotten.

I pulled out your name
And battered you with it,
I took what linked us
And threw it in your face.

Yet you’re still there…
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Comments: 20

noidoipunctcom [2007-12-04 12:48:55 +0000 UTC]

hmmmm...tricky!veeery tricky!poezia asta imi suna a "omul-cu-doua-fete" .criminalul si victima impart frateste acelasi trup,aceeasi durere,acelasi cutit,se privesc ca in oglinda si ucid(iar si iar si iar...)sangele e al nimanui si al amandorura,unul detine gandul altul fapta si tot asa,intr-un tango remarcabil,fiecare il vaneaza pe celalalt...insa frustrarea vine dinauntru caci jocul de cuvinte se transforma in mod dureros intr-o fuga-de-umbra a care-i salvare nu poate fi decat uciderea luminii...si cum nu poti ucide ceva ce nu exista,finalul poeziei de fapt redechide cercul...hmmm...interesant concept!Nina Casian e de altfel celebra pentru poeziile ele "datatoare" de mood.well done indeed!bravo!

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i4dnf [2005-02-02 14:09:29 +0000 UTC]

well, i think you wrote the script for "eternal sunshine...". c'mon admit it. anyways, it's great, it fits my mood right now and its getting fav'ed.



p.s. goddamit, let those cables be and start writing again, you'll forget how if you keep this up long, or you'll start writing poetry with the dam' cables (wich won't be good for us that get the internet through them, would it ? )

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blackoberst In reply to i4dnf [2005-02-02 21:05:11 +0000 UTC]

emiliane.... u so funny man! but you are right! i should start writing again!

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i4dnf In reply to blackoberst [2005-02-02 21:20:45 +0000 UTC]

of course i am, don't be ridiculous. btw, i translated the damn thing and put it up, you know what i'm talking about

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firelily24 [2004-09-10 17:55:37 +0000 UTC]

I know I'm a random commentor, but I found your name on another's watcher list and decided to check it out. This poem....wow. I don't know if it was what you intended with this piece - but reading it made me feel the rage and confusion that comes with being unable to forget someone who has hurt you. *shrugs* It really touched a chord with me and I thank you.

--

~Mercedes

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blackoberst In reply to firelily24 [2004-09-14 06:01:25 +0000 UTC]

yeah... you pretty much sumed it up... 10x for the comment and the fav!

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blackoberst In reply to firelily24 [2004-09-14 06:01:25 +0000 UTC]

yeah... you pretty much sumed it up... 10x for the comment and the fav!

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etpulvis [2004-04-27 04:09:07 +0000 UTC]

I like this a lot. Except for, "Your photos in the gutter, Negatives and all" I would have pictured almost a Fight Club, Indentity kind of inner demons fight. Very cool stuff though. People very rarely realize that love and hate are so closely linked. You cannot truly hate something that you haven't loved, no other emotion is as strong.

Oh, this, along with some of your other, darker work, got me thinking in a gothic kind of mood. I'm going to try my hand at a nightmare scenario.

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blackoberst In reply to etpulvis [2004-04-27 11:26:01 +0000 UTC]

I'm glad I inspire you

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blackoberst [2004-04-24 20:06:50 +0000 UTC]

I'm glad, in a way, that you liked it... I whish you didn't know this "so well"... but then again, the true height of happiness cannot be felt until the depths of sorrow are explored... or at least that's my opinion...

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foolishheart [2004-04-24 15:39:11 +0000 UTC]

Your scent – replaced,
Your smile – contorted,
Your taste – bittered,
Your eyes – forgotten.

I know this so well.
This poem really touches me.
Lovely

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infiltrator15 [2004-03-31 10:58:29 +0000 UTC]

nice work! i really like how the most part of the poem is angry and raging, but the last line gives it a sense of calm closure, like a fade-to-black in a movie, and poses a question as well.

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blackoberst In reply to infiltrator15 [2004-03-31 16:53:39 +0000 UTC]

10x, that was the effect I was actually going for... glad you liked it

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Ashyr [2003-12-28 09:32:38 +0000 UTC]

nah thats all good. cept. it sounds like your refering to an ex girlfriend. aswell as a archenemy. are all villains linked with there nemesis?

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blackoberst In reply to Ashyr [2003-12-28 12:00:34 +0000 UTC]

And is that surprising? One cannot comprehend the full depth of another until one has seen the opposite, the negative, if you will... And this poem WAS supposed to be about an ex-girlfriend (THE ex-girlfriend), although I no longer recognize it as such, it got away from me...

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Ashyr In reply to blackoberst [2003-12-29 06:21:55 +0000 UTC]

good stuff.

thought i picked up something there
_b

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blackoberst [2003-12-27 22:24:57 +0000 UTC]

sorry about that... a little problem with thw server

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cantslowdownkid [2003-12-27 16:18:38 +0000 UTC]

Wow. I really like this piece. I read your others as well, and enjoyed them, however this one has a certain poetic flare lacking in the others. I dig. Well done.

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blackoberst In reply to cantslowdownkid [2003-12-27 22:23:54 +0000 UTC]

As I said on your page... Thanks for becoming my friend... I'm touched by your comment and I hope I won't let you down with my future work... cya around...

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blackoberst In reply to cantslowdownkid [2003-12-27 22:22:57 +0000 UTC]

As I said on your page... Thanks for becoming my friend... I'm touched by your comment and I hope I won't let you down with my future work... cya around...

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