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bugsymoron — Whispers
Published: 2007-01-21 10:30:00 +0000 UTC; Views: 208; Favourites: 2; Downloads: 2
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Description Changes come as people go
today turns short into the morrow;
And yet the Trees stand ever firm
And whispering, whispering.

Lights flash red to green and back
like ants repeating familiar tracks
And while the Trees stand well apart
And whispering, whispering.

Brick and iron compete to reach the sky
young minds dream to one day fly;
And as Trees watch in rooted wisdom
And whispering, whispering.

Eyes to envy the next door brother
Lips to lie from one to another
And while the Trees drink all it in
And whispering, whispering.

Dance of life, having been done,
To soil retire, with Nature become;
And for all of time amongst themselves,
the Trees are whispering, whispering.
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Comments: 8

CheckeredFuture [2009-04-12 22:33:32 +0000 UTC]

"Lips to lie from one to another"
One of my favorite lines.

Makes me look at that pecan tree outside in a whole new light.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

bugsymoron In reply to CheckeredFuture [2009-04-13 04:39:01 +0000 UTC]

Psst. . . Think it's watching you
xP

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

CheckeredFuture In reply to bugsymoron [2009-04-13 16:41:11 +0000 UTC]

I knew it!

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

Saphire282 [2007-06-11 01:44:32 +0000 UTC]

I feel like angels are like the trees, just watching it all happen, knowing how it's gonna end up

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

bugsymoron In reply to Saphire282 [2007-06-11 14:51:52 +0000 UTC]

Yeah, I believe all organisms have some level of soul in them... and that kindaf gave me this idea- see, trees which may live for hundreds of years, though so mobile, could like know more than one generation of people could ever experience for themselves in a lifetime.
In the final verse the people or mature souls join the spirit of nature... angels like you say.

Yeah too right im another tree hugger at heart
Trees rock!

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Saphire282 In reply to bugsymoron [2007-06-11 18:31:19 +0000 UTC]

they do rock! and that is good idea to ponder... I often wonder if the earth has a spirit... my idea's on it flip flop most of the time though...

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Amanda-San [2007-02-07 01:23:32 +0000 UTC]

I was listening to Hours of Wealth [by Opeth] while reading this, and somehow the two matched perfectly. The repetition of the line "whispering, whispering" really adds emphasis to each verse.

If you want a suggestion [which is merely that- a suggestion], I might say add a bit of darkness, emotion, or climax to this piece. Though all of these pieces are there already, for them to come out more would be great. You have a very sweet and somber poem here already that tickles nicely on the tongue. Just add a bit of, well, how else can I describe it?

"WAAAAA!"

motion to it.

Yeah.
Just a suggestion.

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

sarahmm [2007-01-21 10:53:13 +0000 UTC]

Wow, I read this out loud cause I was on the phone to my bf at the time. It sounds even better out loud. Amazing, love it. Nice work.

👍: 0 ⏩: 0