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ClickClickBangUKugly for a reason

Published: 2010-02-19 10:11:29 +0000 UTC; Views: 76120; Favourites: 1171; Downloads: 0
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Description THANK YOU SO MUCH for the inspiring comments and revelations and laying bare, many of them have left me speechless and several have reduced me to tears. thank you @leaf-lover for giving me a DD on probably the one photograph in my gallery i hate, but i do understand why!

for those who have asked, the quote that was given to me by my tutor which led to this picture is:
‘A photograph is both a pseudo-presence and a token of absence. Like a wood fire in a room, photographs – especially those of people, of distant landscapes and faraway cities, of the vanished past – are incitements to reverie*. The sense of the unattainable that can be evoked by photographs feeds directly into the erotic feelings of those for whom desirability is enhanced by distance. The lover’s photograph hidden in a married woman’s wallet, the poster photograph of a rock star tacked up over an adolescents bed, the campaign-button image of a politician’s face pinned on a voter’s coat, the snapshots of a cabin-driver’s children clipped to the visor – all such talismanic uses of photographs express a feeling both sentimental and implicitly magical: the are attempts to contact or lay claim to another reality.’ (Sontag, 1979:16)




EDIT-i'm seriously gobsmacked and touched by the lovely, positive, inspiring comments i'm getting on this image. i certainly wasnt expecting it. thank you so much everyone, it means an awful lot

college self portrait. no editing or post-processing, based on a susan sontag quote.

i nearly chickened out of using this for college at all, i found it very difficult as it has a lot of personal meaning and i find it difficult to post 'warts-and-all' images of myself.

explanation of the image taken from my college posting:

"the neck corset-relates to my eating disorder. i have suffered from bulimia for 15 years, and have recently started therapy for it, the corset represents the purging of food, and the restriction an eating disorder has over your life. i'm hoping that its almost past me, i'm getting there at least.

the invisible face/visible mouth again relating to the bulimia, it is amazing how your life rotates around your mouth and what you put in/take out of it when you have an ED, and i wanted to reflect that.

the taut string on my tummy relates to my body before and after children, i have never been a skinny girl but after having 2 very large children (both over 10 pounds) my body has taken a large toll (which in turn has influenced the eating disorder) and as a larger lady, its the one part of my body i feel isnt in proportion with the rest of me. the string represents the state of my tum before i had children, and how i miss it, but the purple heart is placed over my womb, because i may hate my belly, but i still love it because it gave me two beautiful children.

its a reflection on my body, on my life, mostly past (like in the quote) but also present, 'an incitement to reverie' and remembrance of what things were like before.

its a difficult picture for me, i rarely do full body self portraits but i wanted to, hopefully, do the sontag quote some justice. i dont know if thats been acheived but, even though its been hard, i sorta-kinda like the end result. i'd like it a lot more if it wasnt of me though

i'd really appreciate your feedback on what the image means to you after the explanation, and i am very open about my ED so dont be afraid to ask any questions "

please be nice, remember its an un-edited picture so no crit on that side of things thanks!
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Comments: 1379

ClickClickBangUK In reply to ??? [2018-09-16 13:38:23 +0000 UTC]

You could shit in your hands and clap? 

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MaylinnOwO [2017-06-01 10:40:05 +0000 UTC]

Beautiful perfect body
Amazing photo, good job

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SkyPotatoFire [2016-04-12 03:22:28 +0000 UTC]

Cool.

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manofaith777 [2016-04-09 05:14:42 +0000 UTC]

Get right with God.

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Hazelgee [2015-06-22 15:05:30 +0000 UTC]

There's not many that would brave a candid shot like this. Props to you hon, this is a wonderful piece and the description is very thought provoking. Well deserving the DD!

Such a shame that so many of us have terrible relationships and feelings about our own bodies, especially when others (like our partners) don't see any problem at all!

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scuby8us [2015-03-19 21:08:39 +0000 UTC]

gorgeous

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ComixThreeSevens [2015-02-15 14:08:44 +0000 UTC]

You're so freaking disgusting. No, I don't mean the fact that you're overweight. But you're a half-naked slut who wanted to shock everybody.

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Ihashershey270 In reply to ComixThreeSevens [2017-08-31 05:01:26 +0000 UTC]

Maybe it's a personal thing but In my opinion, what you said was completely wrong. She's not a "Slut who wanted to shock everybody", She's showing her beauty as someone who's not following everyone else's version of "beauty" and the stereotypes. Women aren't sluts just for showing as much skin as the next guy does when he takes off his shirt. If you looked at free the nipple or just women empowerment you'd see that. This gives more meaning than the picture shows. And she's the opposite of disgusting, she's beautiful and just because she has a little weight doesn't change that fact.

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ClickClickBangUK In reply to ComixThreeSevens [2015-05-22 13:17:19 +0000 UTC]

I freaking love this comment :') 

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ComixThreeSevens In reply to ClickClickBangUK [2015-05-22 22:20:02 +0000 UTC]

You're a sack of meat. A very dumb, shameless one. Your parents must be blaming themselves every single day.

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ClickClickBangUK In reply to ComixThreeSevens [2015-06-22 11:16:57 +0000 UTC]

no, but I'm ROYALLY fucking my kids up Keep going, you haven't even remotely touched a nerve, you're not trying hard enough

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Jevenanda In reply to ComixThreeSevens [2015-03-06 12:45:09 +0000 UTC]

Excuse you. This comment is completely out of line. her breasts aren't showing completely, and her twat isn't seen, it's art and you either accept that or get the chuck off this page and site. I mean seriously. It covers as much as most women who wear swimsuits. Are you saying that's disgusting too? What about when men show off their bodies? The only difference is women usually have a smoother landscape and some extra fat deposits that produce milk. So please. Stop being a slut-shaming bigot. Thank you and have a pleasant fucking day.

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ComixThreeSevens In reply to Jevenanda [2015-05-22 22:18:58 +0000 UTC]

Slut shaming isn't a sign of bigotry, it's called decency and morality. None of your arguments is even remotely, idiot.

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zappadust In reply to ComixThreeSevens [2015-08-19 20:56:50 +0000 UTC]

First of all decency and morality are both fairly subjective. Sam Harris gives us the tool of morality being defined by that which helps society versus that which hurts society, but I doubt you have a terribly compelling argument for how a semi-naked artistic photo buried on a rather large website could have much detriment to society as a whole.

Secondly slut shaming usually has more to do with a self-perceived flaw in the shamer rather than anything in the shamee. I care not to guess what your issue might be, but it is up to you to deal with and you should kindly leave others out of it.

Thirdly, on a site where nudity is far more the rule them the exception the fact that you chose to single this photo out for your rancor and bile suggests that it does indeed have to do with her weight, a hypothesis backed up by your preemptive denial that such is the case.

And finally you seem awfully quick to assert that others are idiots when you yourself have trouble finishing a simple sentence.

Though nudity does not necessarily correlate with sexuality, you seem to be conflating the two, thus I think this quote by Heinlein is appropriate: "The second most preposterous notion [that H. Sapiens has ever dreamed up] is that copulation is inherently sinful."

To Lady-Twiglet: I love this peice. Shakespeare said (more or less) that the purpose of art is to hold a mirror up to nature, I believe you have achieved that goal in this photo.

The fact that it was difficult for you and that you hate this photo in particular helps add to it's message, and the unedited, unvarnished look lends it a feel of gritty realism and reinforces the fact that this is your body, as nature has made it: flawed but never the less far more lovely and, yes, closer to the norm than those displayed in photographs would normally have us believe. An unaltered image of one's own body is about as personal as one can get, yet the esoteric imagery of the corset, string and heart add on to that, laying yourself far more bare than just naked flesh on its own.

The only criticism I feel I can offer at this point is the bit of your bottoms there in the lower right corner, I feel they throw the composition off a bit.

I applaud your creativity and your bravery, and I'm glad you seem capable of ignoring the ignorant things said by such philistines as this character.

Thank you in advance for reading the pretentious rantings of an overblown windbag such as myself.

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Meadow-Leaf [2014-06-02 02:42:13 +0000 UTC]

Well said.

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SarahArsalan [2014-03-13 13:03:35 +0000 UTC]

truly amazing, I wish I was brave like that.

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teejott71 [2014-03-05 15:11:48 +0000 UTC]

please step by side, so we can see the ugly thing!? *smile* wonderful pic!!!   

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ZeusLike [2014-01-29 00:14:15 +0000 UTC]

awesome skull tattoos .. totally badass

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EbbtideCheque [2013-05-22 12:23:42 +0000 UTC]

This is beautiful. <3. I am currently undergoing therapy for an eating disorder and I find it so difficult to express how I'm feeling. This is inspiring, the way that you are able to so strongly express yourself both currently and in the past. Thank you, for posting this. You are a strong and beautiful woman.

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foliophil [2013-05-14 22:18:52 +0000 UTC]

Saw this photo on tumblr and found my way here. This is inspiring, powerful, and beyond beautiful, as are you. A true artist. Brava!

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ClickClickBangUK In reply to foliophil [2013-05-15 14:36:10 +0000 UTC]

oooh dont suppose you have a link to the tumblr post? and thank you so much!

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foliophil In reply to ClickClickBangUK [2013-05-22 22:58:41 +0000 UTC]

Here you go! No worries.


[link]

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xXMedicXx [2013-03-23 07:24:56 +0000 UTC]

This is beautiful
I stumbled across it on accident but I'm very very glad I did.

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AliceUnderland [2013-03-01 18:38:04 +0000 UTC]

You know what I see? I see a beautiful human being not afraid to show her true self. A truly wonderful person who has a lot of courage and a beautiful body. You have my respect dear lady.

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AngryBliss [2012-11-21 03:39:19 +0000 UTC]

I like the neck choker and tattoos but and I give you kudos for posting this. I hate my body and I hate being fat. I just don't find it attractive.

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ClickClickBangUK In reply to AngryBliss [2012-11-21 22:30:16 +0000 UTC]

me neither! thank you for your comment x

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TheDouchebagsofDA [2012-10-06 09:19:10 +0000 UTC]

You is not ugly. Let me say! Anybody is pretty, beautiful anyway you are. Trust me. I learn a long time ago about that. I have people in my life to look up to people that love them for who they are and no it doesn't make you cocky our a dick. It makes you pround for who you are. You should be proud to be who you is sexy lady!

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jedibill1 [2012-09-12 17:45:59 +0000 UTC]

Should in no way hate that beautiful belly it is so sexy and the stretch marks actually seal the deal for me. Stretch marks are so beautifully sexy because they are so unique to the individual
person. You truly have a beautiful sexy body

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HeavenlyOdyssey [2012-08-28 20:25:17 +0000 UTC]

You know it take some serious guts to do a picture like this, to hold nothing back and be so vulnerable.
And I applaud it.
I cannot even begin to express my frustration with people that see pictures like this and leave disgusting comments.
Its pictures like this that really inspire me.

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reban [2012-08-21 10:19:19 +0000 UTC]

Holy shitake mushroom. Looking at this was like a kick in the head! You have a very very powerful picture here. I never thought your body loked ugly, not for one second.

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Mafia-Queen [2012-07-27 18:53:42 +0000 UTC]

You're not ugly, you're really beautiful!!!!! I know how you feel though, a lot of the time I think about making myself sick after I eat but it's like I can't stop eating, i guess it's like the opposite of bulimia, I don't know, but I've always wished to be thin, I've always been the biggest out of my friends, I've always been called fay and ugly, and sometime I just want to get a knife a cut the fat off. Whenever I get a tiny bit of self confidence, someone at my school manages to take it away, But it's people like you who make me feel better, because the fact that you were brave enough to post this makes me feel like I can be proud of who I am. it sounds silly but that's how i feel. So Thank You <3

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burg3rking [2012-07-03 12:40:36 +0000 UTC]

you inspire me so much donna x

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ClickClickBangUK In reply to burg3rking [2012-07-03 18:18:45 +0000 UTC]

ahh sweetheart, thank you

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Edward1948 [2012-06-10 19:57:23 +0000 UTC]

very nice

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OffScreen [2012-05-16 20:07:24 +0000 UTC]

I love this photo so much. As someone who lives with bulimia, I too understand the toll it takes on the mind, body and soul.
stay strong. <3

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MieuTheCheagle [2012-04-24 18:42:22 +0000 UTC]

This is really beautiful, I hope you will have everything what makes you happy!

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JackEmerald [2012-03-24 00:10:59 +0000 UTC]

People come in all shapes, sizes, and colors, and there's no "right" or "wrong" combination. Never once did I see a picture of yours and think "She's ugly" or "she's too fat". You're a very beautiful woman.

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Vivienne-Mercier [2012-03-19 02:08:26 +0000 UTC]

Knowing the story behind this photo makes it even lovelier. You have a voluptuous body and should not be ashamed of it.

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graceallen94 [2012-03-15 20:59:58 +0000 UTC]

These are the type of photo's that inspire me. I don't want to see skinny woman in photo's I want to see woman with curves! I love that you've come round to photographing your self like this. I could never do this due to people sneering about what I'd look like. I'm only 17 and still have things laying ahead of me, but having to live in a world where skinny is the new beautiful blocks that fact that; I'm beautiful!
You are a curvy woman, and you are an inspiration to me! It must be so hard having to go through what you did/have/still are! I've never been through that, but I've been bullied because I have never ever in my life been skinny. I was made to be a big girl and to flaunt off the curves that many people don't have now days!

You are beautiful. The way I see it... Bigger woman are more beautiful! they have better personalities (some use this to hide the fact they hate themselves) but it makes that person beautiful, they have more to love, they have bigger and warmer hearts. All of these things are what the glamour models now days don't have!

I am glad to see a big woman in a photograph. And this is what I want to go on doing once I've finished my course. I want to photograph role models for the bigger women so the rest of the curved women have someone to look up to and know they aren't the only ones!

I 'LOVE' your photo and your brave for doing it if you've been through what you have! <3

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Ellorae [2012-03-15 16:42:09 +0000 UTC]

This is a really brave image to display to the world at large - your honesty and courage is inspiring and you have made me feel like applauding you and hugging you all at the same time! This is a truly amazing image xXx

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Efflectum [2012-03-15 08:34:10 +0000 UTC]

Wow just wow, this image has made my day!

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eevee-lily [2012-03-15 01:18:03 +0000 UTC]

I am so glad that sick fecker got banned for the nasty comments he made, I am overweight, I have an eating disorder and a physical illness which means I have hardly any mobility, yet I have been spat at and yelled at by people in a car following me ,screaming at me to lose weight (even when I have been in my wheelchair)
it is people like that chit that got banned here and people I have dealt with that cause some overweight people to commit suicide, so I hope they can sleep at night
my son was bullied by a girl (he also has same health issues as me) who clearly has anorexia yet we would never be nasty to her
TO MUCH HATE AND NOT ENOUGH LOVE
well done you for being so brave to make such a lovely self portrait, it is wonderful
I only ever take portraits of my face and they have to be from a high angle so I can hide my weight, I would never have the courage to do a portrait like yours (( hugs))

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chinaroses [2012-03-15 00:30:38 +0000 UTC]

I love you. You help me put my own body in perspective, and inspire me to be brave and truly look at myself.

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MouseMakesMess [2012-03-15 00:13:12 +0000 UTC]

It's actually quite sad reading the hateful comments on this piece. Society has this idealistic view of what women should look like, and when someone comes along who is different, then people must think that it is disgusting.

The truth of the matter is that we all come in different shapes and sizes. Too much pressure if put on women to be a size 8 or to concentrate on losing all of their baby weight as soon as they have given birth.

I think you are very brave for posting this image and whilst you may hate your body, you're still very beautiful to us and a very strong, independent woman.

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QuoIddon [2012-03-14 22:55:18 +0000 UTC]

i personally think that this is a beatiful photograph, well posed, and a description of a lady who has lived a full life, with all the joy, and all that worries that this entails. To me it represents a woman who is both very real, and should be (though i doubt that this is the case) proud of all the imperfections and scars that go with living that life. each little mark tells part of the overall story, and as with any structure the start is perfect, level, and aesthetically pleasing, however for it to be beautiful it must have been lived in, and carry the marks of being loved and used to it's full potential. I would love this to hang on my wall

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jenepooh [2012-03-14 21:47:29 +0000 UTC]

Still tempting to do one myself. You're still amazing.

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Immortal-Archangel [2012-03-14 20:40:46 +0000 UTC]

this doesnt usually happen with me - but in the interpretation to this picture, especially the description behind the taut string -that touching last line made my eyes well with tears. the pictures hold such original beauty in them, theres no hiding no shadows nothing, and somehow your body shows itself in its true originality.

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SweetPoisonousVenom [2012-03-11 06:50:08 +0000 UTC]

i am beyond speechless. this is so beautiful, so sad, and you are such a beautiful person [inside AND out] for sharing this. so brave. i have admired your work, but now i truly admire you. <3

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ORANGELIGHTNING7 [2012-03-07 17:49:34 +0000 UTC]

absolutely stunning and what a journey youve had, I love this! totally favourited! (and i dont do that often!)

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buttters [2012-02-15 20:53:29 +0000 UTC]

looooooooove this <3

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