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DeviantArtSecret — Secret. 00173
Published: 2013-08-18 04:53:53 +0000 UTC; Views: 12710; Favourites: 328; Downloads: 0
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Submitted by - DAS Helper 6
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Comments: 96
I'm the oldest child of four, two boys, two girls, have a mom and dad ... and this is how I feel towards my younger sister ... and sometimes I feel ashamed for it, because I've always been drilled that the oldest must be strongest ... and yet I seek attention from my younger sister ...
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Uhhh... 
I think some brothers are just assholes, or he's using you as a vent for something. You should talk to him about it. I'm sure he would probably listen to you.
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Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa... Whoa. Calm down a bit. Have you ever considered that maybe it's not you that he's angry at or that he's not even angry at all?
I'm pretty sure it's just a sibling thing. My younger sisters sometimes think that I hate them, when in reality I just want some time to myself, so I shake them off for a bit. Having lots of sisters and being the oldest of them takes away a lot of your personal time. My sisters constantly cling to me like a lifeline, so sometimes it's just a matter of wanting to have some free space.
It might also have something to do with age difference. Me and my youngest sister are pretty much complete strangers to each other. I don't act rude to her or anything, but when we're spending some time together, we have nothing to say. When it comes to my oldest sibling, on the other hand, we will not shut up. The older one is closer to me because we can understand each other better than the younger one, who can barely understand why it rains. So therefor, I'm naturally closer to the older one because we can understand each other better rather than the youngest one.
There's also the possibility that it's a matter of gender difference. I don't know what gender your other siblings are, and I don't know much about that as all of my siblings are girls and I'm a girl myself, but once again, maybe he wants some time alone (I really hope I don't have to explain why, it seems painfully obvious to me) or it's just the differences again.
Either that, or you're being over obsessive. Maybe you're oblivious to it, but I'll bet you anything that maybe he does actually smile at you as much as he smiles at your other siblings. You're just too blinded by your jealousy of your other siblings to notice it because you want all of his attention to yourself. I used to know somebody like that, although it wasn't a sibling matter.
If I offended you in any way by this, I am terribly sorry. It was not meant to hurt you.
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I don't mean to be rude either, but I think this secret relates to me. My brother was the closest person in my family, we played every game together, shared jokes, laughed. Everything. Then our parents split up. My brother decided to live with my father where as I chose to stay with my mother. My two sisters went with our mother too.
We moved away, and kept in contact, but then they moved. I was excited to see my brother again, after many nights of waiting. The thing is, he was so happy to see my sisters and mother, and then when it came to me, I was a good item to hit at. Our family lives closer together, but not in the same house, and every time we visit, it's the same, I get pushed around. I try not to let it bother me but, it's caused many arguments.
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I know, it probably does relate to you more. I was just linking it to my experiences. 
That sucks, by the way. :\ You need a hug.
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Yeah, I sort of understand what the ST is saying but I can see what you are saying too.
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Take heart, family has a bond that is everlasting, whether he knows it or not.
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ignore your brother he is probably getting off on being mean to you. Love him but don't care what he does or says any more. if you have other siblings hang out with them more and him less. Make him feel ignored and cut out. He does not matter to you, he never did and never will matter to you.
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i didnt see it before... now i do... now i just want to give her a hug...
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Maybe it is her. Shit.
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My sister taylor has completely shut everyone out of her life other then her husbands family... I sorta understand how you feel.. not quite with that situation... maybe more with my brother andrew.. he used to beat me up when we were little and then he eventually moved back to his mom and got another little sister and is very nice to her... my dad married again and he treats our stepsister worse than me (but she also tries to piss everyone off and ignore all the rules) when we first moved into the house we are in now we were really close.. anyway ignore the rest of my god awful dresseing story. Point is it will always get better unless they are brainwashed by a spouse!
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My advice:
Stop drawing people with their hearts cut out and run through with knives. Writing emotionally disturbing messages to a brother that you do not yet understand will likely only further alienate you.
Your brother's love should not define your world in such a way. And if you drew/wrote this for him, I warn you: You are young and passionate, if you are attempting to pressure him with such clearly demanding imagery/phrases- Calm down, and try regular conversation. Because "This shit is scary, Yo!".
Again, you are younger, you cannot understand EVERYTHING that goes on in your brother's head, or if he really even has a problem with YOU at all.
Family does not immediately equal love. They may love you. But they don't have to like you, so find common ground, and do not expect to get it all picture perfect on the first attempt. A good relationship takes years to create.
And if regular conversation and respecting his personàl rights and space doesn't work, your brother might just be a dick. It happens.
I give no apologies for being blunt, because you either have a problem or you don't. You either get on with it like an mature person who deserves respect or you simper on and deal with emotional crap for the rest of your life wondering why real life doesn't emulate hallmark cards. You make your future, or you let it be made for you. Control yourself.
PS I have a younger sister and love her very much. But I respect and like my younger sister because she is a dynamo of confidence and strength where and when it counts. She is still just a woman getting through her life and all its issues, so she is human too and I remember her before she had all these things.
Good luck.
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I kinda understand this, I'm the oldest in my family and some people would think that I don't care for my younger siblings but I do. I sometimes don't show it either but I really to the point that I begin to worry what they're future would be like when they're older; two of them have mental problems and my siblings sometimes do think I hate them, but when I worry to much it gets the best of me. I do care for them and I for them to be succuessful in life.
I'm sorry if this was confusing to anyone, it's hard for me to explain this.
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I understand you since I have the same thing as well.
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Being an older sister, it can be hard to see from the younger one's perspectives... It's so sad.
I have to think about how my actions can affect them now and in the future. Takes some careful thinking and TLC.
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Am I the only one having trouble making out what the words in the shadows are saying?
I think the last two words are "to die" but I might be mistaken and I can't make heads or tails of the first word. It might say "want" because of the three fingers branching outward and they did the same two hands crossing as they used for the "to"
Argh, anybody else?
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Wow, I didn't even realize that those were supposed to be words until I read this comment. o.O
Tricky background. XD
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I think it says > I want to die
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I read "I want to die".
....I think I got it right?~
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aww, thats sad.
me, myself, I am the middle of two sisters, so idk
how this feels...
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Q.Q being the oldest of 2 brothers and 2 sisters, it's not easy being equal to all
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It might be sad, but DeviantArt is for showcasing people's artistic works, not exploiting people's personal problems for the want of a like or comment.
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Artistic work is derived from emotional problems.
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True, but usually art inspired from the human condition is also marred by artistic effort. This is simply a few words pasted onto a cartoon, and I honestly wouldn't consider it as someone who has put dedication and talent into creating a work of art.
What would you define as true art? Qualms over sibling favoritism or the Mona Lisa?
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Wow, that's how I feel about my big brother, except that we don't have more siblings, he always is good with his friends, but he always is so mean and rude with me, sometimes I feel that he doesn't considers me his little sister.
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Don't think we've seen one of these on the front page in a while.
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Older siblings have all kinds of reasons for treating younger siblings poorly or unfairly.. but it never has to do with that younger sibling.. remember that your brother is still a child himself, and has confusing emotions to deal with. Maybe you have to do the smiling for a while. I hope that when you are all adults you can see it all as being children and be good friends. It gets better.
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My brother was like that too. But not just towards me, but towards many people. I regret not asking him what was wrong when he was alive, but now it's too late.
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no not having one is not as bad as them not loving you ok
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Not if you loose one. ._.||
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