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Published: 2019-03-02 16:02:58 +0000 UTC; Views: 545; Favourites: 6; Downloads: 0
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Story: After President Business' Safety Film melts in the projector, Batman vows to make a new one and became a famous movie director in the process. His blind ambition causes his cast to get injured so often that they quit!LucarioNo1Fan
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(We see batmanβs Claws edge the screen)
Batman: The Theater: Movie night. The crowd goes wild with anticipation. (Gets close to Sweet Mayham) Close up on General Mayhem, the Alien with a heart of glitter and acid. She turns-(Sweet Mayhem punches him in the face) OOMP! Right in the cowl...
(We see President Buisness and Tristan walking in and taking center stage)
π: 0 β©: 1
(It's Trystin)
Me: Welcome everyone.
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(Ah)
Everyone: (Cheers)
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Me: And now a word from President Business.
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President Business: Thank you, Trystan! Now, Remeber when I said that I would show you guys an action packed film that would keep you on the edge of your seats?
(Everyone Cheers)
President Business: Well, I lied.
(Everyone Groans)
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Sonic: Dang.
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Balthazar: This is a disappointment...
President Business: Sorry, But it was the only way I could get you in here! Now, roll the film!
(Everyone Groans louder)
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Emmet: But President Business, we haven't had an accident in like 2 Days.
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Puppycorn: Actually, itβs 3 days! (Jumps up the ladder) Iβll fix it! (Pulls The β2β off of the board, but ends up falling backwards before he can change it) OOF! OW! OOCH! OOMP! SURF! BOARD! CHAIN! SAW! SIZE! 4! MENβS! SOCKS! (Hits The ground) OOF! (The ladder falls on him) OOF!
(Beat)
Batman: (Exasperated) Roll the film...
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(The film plays)
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Narrator: Ah, itβs a sunny day in Anyplanet, Systar! (We see a man playing frisbee with his dog) But look out! Those glitter croppers contain glitter that can be pretty AND pretty bad to inhale! (We see a ship spraying glitter) So when you hear the shipβs, itβs time to duck and cover! (The man and his dog put ducks on their heads) Not that kind of duck!
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Man: (laughing)
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Dog: Woof!
(The glitter covers them as they start coughing and wheezing)
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Batman: (groans)
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Batman: Cut, Cut! You call that a film!? That last shot was just screaming βClose-upβ! (Walks over to the film projector) And the lighting quality was so horrible, a bat would shake itβs head at it! (Starts fiddling with the projector) Watch how a slight diffusion in color can Change-(the film burns and falls apart)...Oops.
President Business: Batman!!! Look what you did!!! You just ruined the safety film!!!
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All: (cheering)
Green Lantern: No safety film!? No safety film!? WE'LL NEVER BE SAFE AGAIN!!!
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(He backs into a rake, stunning him and causing him to create several objects with his ring...including a bail of hay right above him, which falls on top of him. He stumbles out, and is promptly trampled by a bunch of wild animals. Cut back to the group who is staring...and Superman is giggling and clapping)
Green Lantern: (weakly) Medic.
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Me: Ooh, that's gotta hurt.
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Batman: Oh, donβt be dramatic. We can make a new film that will be MUCH better than that pile of kragle.
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Batman: In fact, I'm gonna direct it.
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Sweet Mayham: You? Direct?
Batman: Yes! I never told anyone this before, but...my one passion in life is to be a world famous director.
Star: I thought it was to be a swimsuit model!
Batman: Second Passion in life.
Susa: Batsy, I had lice that had more talent than you!
Batman: Pessimist. And if you help me, iβll let you all star in it.
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All: (cheering)
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Batman: Actors.
(Otudoors, Everyone is preparing the βSafetyβ film)
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Banarnar: (holding a spotlight)
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President Business: (Going over the script) Batman, iβve Been going over this script, and I donβt see a single thing about safety in here!
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Batman: On the contrarey, President Business.
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Batman: Mutan Space Pirates From Plaet Batty will be able to teach safety in an action packed, career defining, and award winning way! (Walks over to Emmet) Emmet! You character is Jack Mcawesomeness, a rebel space ranger from the destroyed planet Nickleon!
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Emmet: It's Nickelodeon.
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Batman: Whatever.
Dmmet: Batman, my pants are too tight! Can I get-
Batman: Susan! You are the strong, yet dainty Princess Geia!
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Susan: (acting) Save me, Jack!
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Batman:...Good enough! (Walks up to Puppycorn And Unikitty) Princess! You and your brother are the two expendable droids who get obliterated within the first few minuets! Your opinion?
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Puppycorn: (gibberish)
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Unikitty: He jays that it was the part he was born to play!
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Batman: Okay, great!
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Waterva Wa-Nabi: (Turns her left arm into a large megaphone) Quiet on the set! All actors on set for the road safety awareness scene!
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(Batman sits in the directors chair)
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Batman: Aaaand..Action!
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(Fabuland Dog closes a clapper board)
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Emmet: Hurry, Princess Geia! Theyβre gaining on us!
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Batman: Good good.
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Batman: You approach the roads, you stop, you look-
President Business: Ahem!
Batman: Both ways.
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Batman: AND CUE THE DEADLY ASTEROIDS!!
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Emmet and Susan: What!?
(Waterva Wa-Nabi, in the form of a catapult, launches the rocks into the sky)
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All: (screaming)
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Batman: Good, Good, feel free to ad-lib!
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Unikitty: (panics)
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Puppycorn: AAAAAAAAH!
Tempo: Melody, what are my lines again?
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Melody: You look up, see an asteroid coming and yell "NO!"
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Tempo: Okay! (Inhales, then the two are crushed by one of the rocks)
Batman: Great work everybody! (Walks over to Waterva Wa-Nabi) Sweetheart, those styrofoam rocks were fantastic! So lifelike!
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