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Doodles-For-Murfs — Alucard
Published: 2011-08-22 21:49:17 +0000 UTC; Views: 15253; Favourites: 277; Downloads: 129
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This is mainly for myself. Kinda like an inside joke.So.... I was watching episode 6 of Hellsing with my boyfriend. AND EVERY FLIPPING TIME ALUCARD WAS JUST SITTING THERE *points* WHILE PEEPS BE DIEING I WAS ALL "Just chillin' yo." And my BOO was ALL "make poster" and I was all " DESU NYA!!!"
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Comments: 85
*sharp inhale* So...how can I help you?
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When alucard starts acting polite, shits about to go nuclear.
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This is me when my mom asks "why aren't you doing your homework already?" XD
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Alucard: Me? Just chillen...
Me: True.. True...
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Alucard: That was a seventy inch, plasma screen tv. *Sharp intake of breath* So, how can I help you?
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Valentine: You must be the great Alucard.
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Alucard: 'Sup?
Valentine: I've heard so much about you. *Long rambling* who casts a shaddow on darkness itself!
Alucard: Oh you dirty bitch, work the shaft!
Lol, I was literally re-watching this.
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Luke Valentine: Ex-cuse you..?
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Alucard: Oh, I'm sorry, I like to dirty talk while someone's sucking my dick.
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Luke Valentine: ...Perhaps I should just skip to my point. My name is Luke Valentine.
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Alucard: And I'm Comon Sandiego, guess where I am!
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..................... It's CARMEN
Luke Valentine: I'm trying to have a serious conversation with you here...
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Alucard: Oh, so am I. And I'm failing. And I'm sorry. It's just that this blonde little shit strolled into my room, destroyed my plasma screen Tv ! And is trying to impress me like I'm his alcoholic father.
Alucard and Valentine: *Pulls out their huns*
Alucard: Be a sport and grab daddy another bear. (One of my fav quotes! XD)
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Luke Valentine: You can't touch me, I was hand-crafted to kill you. My speed, my stamina, my power all rival, nay, dwarf yours! In comparison to you, I am a demi-god!
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Alucard: Really? Just, really?
Valentine: Really.
Alucard: REALLY?!?
Valentine: REALLY!
Alucard: Releasing restriction level one.
Valentine: Level what?
Alucard: *Hell hound mode*
(My own little part that I can imagine: Valentine: *Pees his pants*)
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Alucard: *shoots Luke's leg off*
Luke: AAHH! GOD!! FUCK!!
Alucard: You know how they say TV makes you violent? Well, I say not having my TV IS MAKING ME PRETTY FUCKING VIOLENT!! *shoots Luke's other leg off*
Luke: I'm near the stairs. Gotta get up the stairs. If I can just get up those stirs, I... *sees how far up the staircase is* oooooooooooooooh, fuck.
Alucard: Come on, you were talking all that good shit a second ago! Then I blew your fucking legs off!
Luke: *utterly terrified* I... you... what the fuck?!
Alucard: What's wrong, demigod? Just grow back your legs! *crushes Luke's leg* Summon up your demons! Hit me! Fight me! Give me a hug!
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YASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!! I LOVE YOU! *Excited squealing* *Even more excited glomp* YOU ARE MY NEW SIBBLING!!!
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I really do love mah Hellsing!
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Just chillin and watchin Adventure Time on his plasma tv.
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Until Luke Valentine comes in and destroys said plasma tv.
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That was a 70 inch... plasma screen tv.
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Just chill in like a boss
Awesome and hilarious I love these motivational posters they are so funny please keep on doing these they are great
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Haha thank you very much! Always enjoy making people happy with these
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Your welcome they're really good and funny 
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Alucard: So! What can i do for YOU today? ^_^
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Luke Valentine: You must be Alucard.
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Luke Valentine: I have heard quite a bit about you
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Alucard: Oh you dirty bitch work the shaft!
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Alucard: O I'm sorry I like to dirty talk when someones SUCKING MY DICK.
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Luke: Perhaps I should just get to my point. I'm Luke Valentine
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And im carmen sandiego, GUESS WHERE I AM!
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Luke: I'm trying to have a serious conversation with you
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Alucard: And so am i, and im failing, and im sorry for that...
Alucard: its just that some blond little shit just strolled into my room, destroyed my 70 INCH PLASMA TV, and is trying to impress me like im his alcoholic father
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*Guns point at each others head* Alucard: Now. Be a sport and grab daddy another beer would you?
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Seras: *pins Jan Valentine* Arm-bars everywhere!
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because this blonde little shit just strolled into his room, destroyed his 70 INCH PLASMA TV, and is trying to impress him like hes his alcoholic father!
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Alucard: I'm just finding it so hard to concentrate because some blonde little shit strolled into my room. Destroyed my 70 INCH PLASMA TV and is trying to impress me lime I'm his alcoholic father.
*Luke and Alucard hold each other at gun-point*
Alucard: Be a sport, would you and go grab daddy another beer
*BANG!*
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Alucard: Then all of a sudden these shmucks kicked in my door!
[Door gets kicked in by B.O.P.E. forces, as Alucard recounts his trial of tribulation.]
Alucard: One of them yelled out: (Cut to the B.O.P.E. Schmuck.)
Shmuck: GET ON YOUR KNEES!
Alucard: And I responded with: (Cut to the past.) I'm not your mother last night!! And they took exception to that.
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Alucard: But we all know how that song and dance goes (Cut to Alucard-related beatdown) And I killed all but one of them.
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