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hypermegatailsfan — Her Haunted Mansion Chapter 3
Published: 2011-04-19 23:32:38 +0000 UTC; Views: 5102; Favourites: 57; Downloads: 3
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Description "Minnie… hey, my Minnie. Time to get up."

Her eyelashes fluttered, as she was called that tender name once more. How long had she been out? She yawned, meaning to push her pillow aside, but as she moved her hands, she wasn't touching any pillow, but some firm legs. She froze in place, remembering everything that happened, and just where she had fallen asleep. In an instant, she was sitting up, her face blushing deeply, flustered by just how unladylike she had been. "I-I'm sorry! I, uh, ah, I didn't, oh my, mean…"

His chuckle put her at ease, and as he stood, he took her hand, so she would stand as well. "We're home, my Minnie. Let's go." The door to the carriage opened on its own, and she followed him outside, where the moon hung daintily in the sky. "Welcome to my mansion."

Her breath stopped as she looked upon the massive building, so tall that it seemed to reach into the heavens.  It was beautiful, with endless windows and rooms, grotesque gargoyles perched every other floor, and for every time she blinked, the house was different. One moment a room had the curtains open, revealing a music room donned with books and instruments, but in the next, the room never existed, the houses had ended there, and a gargoyle stood there instead, grinning merrily at her. It was dizzying, its height and its majesty, surrounded by long grass blowing in the wind. A gate sealed up this makeshift garden, but there was no neighborhood around. She looked left and right, but the grass and the gate just took up more of her vision. Nothing existed save for this block of land.

The gate's entrance opened with an unearthly creak, and standing on the other side of the gate was another man, a canine, lanky more than tall, in more slobby attire than Mickey.  His long ears flapped in the wind, and his clothing colors of green and orange reflected well off of the lantern he held in one hand. His eyes were red… same as the raven, as the horses, as Mickey. The exact same color. He smiled, showing off two buck teeth, raising his lantern to get a better look at the mice. "Welcome home, Master." He chirped, pleasant. "And I see ya got the missus this time! Aint she a beaut!"

Mickey politely tipped his hat to the dog. "Thanks, Goofy. I take it all is well?"

"All quiet on the home front." He saluted in response, nearly smacking himself in the head. He then gazed upon the curious little miss, and offered his hand to shake. "Nice ta finally meetcha, Minnie. Name's Goofy, and I'm the gate-keeper of the mansion. Gotta make sure ta let the right people in and the wrong people out."

Minnie felt herself smiling – the man was charming in his own little way, simple but happy. She took his hand, shaking it, though questions still brewed. "It's nice to meet you too, Goofy. I didn't know anyone else lived here…"

"Why, shoot!" Goofy plopped himself down on a blank headstone. "We got tons a folk here. The Master is a swell fella, always invitin' people over to stay. We aint ever lonely, yer sure to feel right at home. " He then paused, and began to look around, puzzled. "Hey, where's Pluto at?"

"Pluto?" Minnie asked, wondering who that was, when she heard the caw of her dear raven. Glancing behind her, she saw the raven had ridden the carriage, and was now flying away from it, towards the trio. Then his feathers began to take on a new color, a mesh of orange and yellow, and the bird grew taller and bigger, and black ears sprouted from its head, claws turned into paws and in one swift movement, it had jumped off a bird and landed as a dog. A silver collar was around his neck, with the letters PLUTO engraved. He sat down, and looked amused at the stun he had given Minnie, who was without words for this transformation.

"Hiya, Pluto!" Goofy whistled, and the pet came towards him at the call of his name. "Whatcha doin', givin' our lil miss a scare like that?" He looked to Minnie, merrily explaining. "Pluto here can make himself any animal he darn well pleases. Aint it a sight!"

Minnie opened her mouth, but nothing came out, so Mickey spoke instead. "We've got to get inside. Pluto, keep Goofy company, will ya?" The dog nodded obediently. "And I'll expect the both of ya to be inside when dinner comes. It's a special night."

"Count on it, Master!" Goofy saluted again, this time knocking his head with the lantern. He winced in pain, but was able to laugh off his own injury.

Minnie clung onto Mickey's hand, unsure how to phrase her questions. How did a dog simply… change, into other things? But the mice were already at the front door, and the time to ask had passed, she felt. He did not even touch the door; it opened all on its own.

"Welcome home, Master."

Inside, waiting, were two ducks, who had chimed the greeting together. To the left was a female, a maid, donned in green and black, and a black bat figure accompanying the top of her uniform. She held a featherduster, and smiled instantly upon seeing Minnie, suppressing a giggle. To the left was a male, a butler, donned in red and yellow, with streams of gray and black running through the top of his head. He appeared to be more serious, but nodded with respect as the mice entered, and the door closed behind them. Both of their eyes were red… as Goofy, as Pluto, as Mickey, red.  The inside of the house was just as impressive as the outside, impeccably detailed with paintings, classy furniture, the sort of house only the richest of the rich could dream to furnish.

"So, this is Minnie." The girl picked at her featherduster, eyeing Minnie up and down. "She's even prettier than you said, Master. She'll just make a lovely addition, I know it."

Mickey gestured to the ducks with one arm. "Minnie, this is Donald, the butler, and Daisy, the maid." Donald bowed, and Daisy curtsied. He then turned his attentions to the one called Donald. "I have some business to attend to… get dinner ready."

"Consider it done." Donald said, already turning to go.

"And Daisy, see if there's something Minnie can get changed into."

"Of course, Master!" Daisy yanked on Minnie's arm, causing the other to yelp in surprise. "Why, just look at you, covered in soup and mud… that won't do at all. But, not to worry, I know just the thing that will suit you! Come, come!" She dragged Minnie away, taking her up the first pair of stairs they came upon. There was no time for Minnie to sight-see, as she was suddenly thrusted into a walk-in closet, with Daisy's hands pulling off the nightgown, leaving Minnie no privacy. Minnie fidgeted as she lost her clothes, and found her voice as she sat upon a small wooden chair.

"Excuse me!" Minnie cried out, causing Daisy to pause in her duty. "I… I was just wondering… why do you all call Mickey 'Master'?"

Daisy pulled out a brush from the closet's many drawers, and began to brush down Minnie's fur, starting with the ears. "Because he's the Master of the house, of course. We all owe him so much, for inviting us to stay here…"

Minnie tried to stay still for the grooming, but now that her questions were being answered, she couldn't stop asking now. "You were all invited to stay?"

"Same as you, dear." She sighed overdramatically with a toss of her head. "But I bet you wouldn't want to hear such boring stories…"

"Oh, but I do!"Minnie turned her head to look at Daisy, keeping her hands on her knees. "I want to know everything, about all of you, about Mickey…"

The maid looked down at her, and then smirked, poking Minnie on the nose. "Very well. Where to start…  oh, yes. Your little raven, our little Pluto." As the story began, she continued to brush, and with each new tale being told, Minnie was redressed, but never complained, doing her best to be attentive.

"He was once a hunter's dog, and he was a very good one, too. He could catch any bird his owner told him to, chase down every animal that came across his path, he was the top dog. But even though he always did his best, his owner was just cruel. He would beat poor Pluto every day… with his fists, with a switch, with whatever was available. Pluto just wasn't doing good enough, in his owner's eyes. Some days that man would even let Pluto starve, taking all of the kills for himself.  Pluto couldn't run away, since he was chained up, like some kind of prisoner. He just wanted someone to tell him he'd done a good job, maybe give him a bone every once in a while.

Then, the Master came to him, when the owner was fast asleep. He told Pluto that he would feed him every day, he would treat him like a good dog, and let him roam free. In return, Pluto would be Mickey's eyes and ears out in the world, and help him look for others to invite here.  Pluto agreed, and that's how he came to be able to change into your cute little raven.  He is the master's faithful hound, reporting back everything going on outside.

Now, for Goofy… he was once a soldier, a novice in his kingdom's army. Truth be told, the war they were in was pretty pointless, but his king was very stubborn… he refused to lose, even if it could have meant peace. Goofy just did as he was ordered, fighting every day, but he didn't really like it. All he ever wanted was a family, to have a reason whenever he lifted his sword. It happened that one day his group managed to capture some other soldiers, their enemies.  The plan was to kill them the next day, to send a message to the opposing kingdom. But that night, when it was Goofy's turn to feed them, he heard one of the enemy soldiers crying his little heart out. It turned out this soldier was just a boy, also forced to serve in the army, and he deeply missed his family, wanting nothing more than to go home. Goofy couldn't bare to have this little one be killed, so he let him go. When Goofy's brothers-in-arms found out, they were furious, and decided he would join the other executed the next day.

The Master came to him as Goofy awaited the gallows. He told Goofy that he'd give him a family, a good home, that he would only fight if absolutely necessary. In return, Goofy would defend the mansion, and keep intruders out, while helping the wanted in. Goofy agreed, and now he is our gate-keeper. He makes sure we're all safe and sound, and he gets all the adoration he deserves.

Then, there's Donald and I. We were as opposite as could be – I came from a fabulously wealthy family, and he didn't have a penny to his name. But we were in love, and we would always sneak out to see each other. Unfortunately, my parents wanted me to get married to some man I didn't care for, and they were wealthy enough to have the police in their pockets, ensuring Donald kept away from the wedding. But I knew I'd rather die than be with anyone but Donald, so we made plans to run away the night before my wedding. All we had was a single horse and the clothes on our backs. But one of Donald's so-called friends was bribed into telling the police and my family what we were doing, and so we wound up being chased into a forest. The police shot the poor horse, and we fell into a river, and we thought any moment we would be found and killed.

That's when the Master came. He told us we could be together forever, safe from my family and the police, and we would be equal in every way. In return, we would be his loyal servants, attending to his house, keeping things in order, and taking care of the others who came to live with us. We agreed, and so here we are… and don't you look lovely!"

Minnie had been so entranced by the stories that she hadn't realized she was in the new dress. A mirror was propped at the end of the closet, and she turned to look at herself. It was red and yellow, echoing the same spider-webs on Mickey's outfit, her arms entirely covered by the red, and a bat adorned the very top, just as it had for Daisy's. Minnie almost didn't recognize herself, and she tugged on the dress, rather happy to be in new clothing. "Thank you, Daisy…"

"Well, I don't know about you, but I'm starving." Daisy took Minnie's hand, picked up the featherduster, and walked out of the closet with her. "Dinner's probably ready by now."

When they came downstairs, they were already in a dining room – but, Minnie thought, didn't these stairs lead to the front door? She dismissed the confusion, as a wave of smells took hold of her nose. A long table stretched out before her, covered in white drapery. Candles were lit in the center of the table, and Goofy and Pluto had already taken their seats, devouring everything in sight. There were hundreds of plates on the table, each one holding a food Minnie had never tasted before. Meats and vegetables and desserts and breads… to a girl who had only eaten pea soup and medicine, it was nearly overwhelming. She had no idea where to even begin.

"Have a seat." Donald was suddenly at her side, pulling out a chair for her. "And have all you like. There's always room for seconds."

"Oh… thank you." She sat down, and he comfortably pushed her in, before seating Daisy, and then himself. She watched the servants eat, and then, slowly, began to pick at the plate in front of her. She cut off a piece of chocolate cake, and popped it into her mouth… she almost gasped – how delicious! How exquisite! It was as if her tongue had never touched a thing before this moment. She swallowed it happily, and couldn't contain her joy. "Oh! Oh, this is, all of this… it's so yummy!"

Donald's turn to smirk came, his pride inflated. "Of course it is. I made it. Come on, eat up, we're not going to run out anytime soon!" Daisy gave him a playful shove which he ignored. "After all, today is a special night."

Mickey had said that too, hadn't he? Minnie took several mouthfuls before talking again. "It is?"

Now all of those red eyes were on her. Donald picked up a glass, filled with wine, taking a long sip before answering. "You finally came here. The Master has been waiting years until the right time to invite you came along." He shook his glass at Daisy. "Didn't you tell her about Pluto?"

"Of course I told her." Daisy huffed, wagging a fork at him. "But she's a modest girl, she doesn't understand."

Minnie put her own fork and knife down, looking at Pluto for the briefest of moments before addressing the ducks. "Daisy told me how he came to live here, and Goofy said he can turn into any animal…"

"I also said he's the Master's eyes and ears." Daisy twirled her fork in the air for an extra flair. "Everything Pluto sees and hears, so can the Master."

"In other words," Donald rested his elbows on the table, his head balanced on his entwined hands. "The Master's been watching you for years."

Minnie blushed all over again, hands on her lap. Ten years, Mickey had watched over her? No wonder he knew all about her! But her life was so dull and boring, why had he kept Pluto there for so long to watch her? Someone as interesting as Mickey didn't need to keep so much attention to someone like her. Still, the very thought of it made her smile. To know someone else had been keeping her company all of those lonely years gave her heart strength.

When she lifted her eyes, all of them were smiling as well. Goofy swallowed a hunk of food down his throat, and then spoke. "I knew it, she's gunna fit right in. Ya know, kinda reminds me a' this one joke I heard…"

With that, the party spiraled into bliss, as the gate keeper cracked joke after joke, sending the others laughing so hard that drinks were spilled. Daisy would weave stories of others in the mansion that Minnie hadn't seen yet, while flirting with Donald who would bashfully return the gesture. Pluto, when full, would leave his seat and put his head on Minnie's lap, tail thumping when his ears were scratched. Though she would finish a plate off, it would be full again when she turned her head away. These servants were warm and friendly, entertaining her with each breath they took. They had already accepted her as one of their own, and Minnie found herself wishing to never leave their company.

But all of the laughter and speech came to a halt when Minnie felt a hand on her shoulder. She looked to whence it came from, and there stood Mickey, having come out of the shadows. "I knew you'd get along with everyone… but I think I'd like ya to myself for just a bit." His hand slid down her arm until it grasped her hand, and the blush she had fought to get rid of returned tenfold. Pluto moved away from her lap, and Minnie stood, gazing into his eyes. Mickey tapped his chin for a moment in thought, and then nodded. "And that dress looks very good on ya… great work, Daisy."

"Thank you, Master." Daisy cooed, admiring the lovely couple. "But we all knew what she'd be wearing since day one." The others were silent, watching intently.

Mickey looped his arm with Minnie's, beginning to walk away with her into the next room. "Would ya care to dance with me?"

"Dance? Oh I…" The romantic idea of it all was too perfect, but there was a fatal flaw. "I don't know how."

"Just follow my lead." He snapped his fingers, and Minnie looked to the room they had just entered, which was now far bigger than it was before.

It was an elegant ballroom now, with a smooth dancing floor, the wooden painted with fairy-tale couples doing their bridal dances. White candles were lit all around, and a singular organ laid to one side, encompassing the entire wall, each pipe bigger than a single person. It was empty, and Minnie felt each step they took was an echo that bounced everywhere. Yet as they continued to walk towards the center, people would appear. They would just appear! Everywhere she looked, there was suddenly a new person standing there, even if that space was unoccupied just a moment before. Some nodded to her, some bowed and curtsied, some smiled, it seemed as though everyone was happy to see her.

Once they had reached the center of the dance floor, the organ's keys were pressed, all on their own, and music filled the air. It was a song she had never heard, but she knew it to be beautiful, soothing her bones and floating in the atmosphere. The others were already beginning to dance, holding hands and dresses, moving back and forth in time to the melody. Mickey's arm came around her waist, and he began to step, slow with grace. Minnie tried to follow, taking her feet were Mickey's once were. He was patient with her, and this dancing carried a simple style to it. She had been dreadfully worried that so much moving would stir her cough – only, then, to notice, ever since she had arrived to this mansion, she hadn't coughed once, or felt ill at all.

When she was confident she didn't need to watch their feet anymore, she returned his gaze once more, became lost in that red world once more. How warm his smile was, compared to his cold touch. The world ceased to exist except for him, and she longed for him to speak, to hear that velvet voice soothe her and settle her desires. His grip on her waist felt strong, he was never going to let her go, and she begged for that. It seemed as if her attraction to him had only become stronger since they first met… hearing Daisy's stories of his kindness made him endearing, how willing he was to help the less fortunate!

How many souls had he saved, by letting them past the door? He risked the wrath of so many evil ones, but was willing to do so for the need of the deserved. Yet even as the thoughts of those others continued to roll in her mind, the selfish beating in her heart stirred her on to ask of only herself. "Have… have you really been watching me, all this time?"

A quick nod, the dance never stopped. "Ever since Pluto first saw ya, I couldn't keep my eyes off of ya. I had to know everything about ya… oh, my Minnie." She was pulled in closer, tighter, his mouth on her forehead again. She closed her eyes, almost wishing to be swallowed up by him, and clung onto him tightly. "I have so many friends here… but they can't give me what I need. There's always been something missing, and this house isn't complete."

His hand left her waist, and touched her chin, lifting her head up. His lips went over her cheek, brushing down her neck, and she shivered at how icily his kisses were. Her body lost the will to move, but the couples continued to dance around them. Off, she could faintly hear Donald taking his beloved onto the dance floor, and Goofy kindly rebuffing the advances of someone named Constance. But Mickey's words controlled her once more as he continued; containing sadness she didn't think he was capable of. "I need someone to love me. The mansion needs a Mistress."

His hand cradled the back of her head, as she speculated to what he was trying to give her. "Stay here and you'll have everything you've ever wanted. Friends, a family, freedom…"  Their eyes connected once more, and she was trapped in the spiderwebs his attire was covered in.  "In return… my Minnie… you will be my wife."

Her eyes widened, wondering if she had heard right. To be his wife, his bride – her body shook with the wonderful implications that would bring. To be his, and his alone, to belong to him body and soul, to always be at his side, to always have that breath in her ears and that cold on her fur… Inside, she demanded to accept it, to only be known as the wife of this beautiful and amazing man, but that modesty and kindness for which she was loved for spoke out first. "Why?"

He took her hand, and placed it upon his chest – how odd, she remarked, that she felt nothing beat. "I've loved ya since the moment Pluto saw ya… it can only be you. So beautiful… so kind… ya mean everything to me. I need to have ya by my side, I need to have your love. I need ya in every single way. Stay with us… stay with me."

Had she come to stay for good? Hadn't she only left to know what the outside world was like? Now she understood – to stay here was permanent. This was a onetime offer, and there would be no going back either way. Her mouth felt dry, unable to speak. Could she really stay here in a place of people she had only just met? The burden of this choice weighed heavily on her, and she leaned on him, feeling weak.

Why did someone like him need her, need anyone? He was so strong, so wonderful. Yet his voice sounded so troubled, begging her for the answer he wanted to hear. She was afraid to answer him, this responsibility completely foreign to her. Could someone like her keep this great man happy for the rest of their lives? She felt she did not deserve this chance. "M-Mickey… I…"

His nose was to her cheek, and his lips were so close. Was he going to kiss her at last where those lips belonged? Oh, please, yes, her little body screamed, she would agree to anything he offered, if he would just put the ice on her mouth, to take everything she was and give her that passion.

Something shattered, and the world stopped.

The other dancers were no more, the music stopped playing, and Minnie saw that a glass had fallen from the banquet table, thanks to Goofy suddenly standing up, also knocking a chair over in the process. "There's an intruder!" How he could have possibly known, Minnie couldn't fathom, but he was up and running away, and Donald, Daisy, and Pluto were fast on his heels.

Mickey frowned, and he now only held onto Minnie's hand, joining in the pursuit. "We'd better see what this is about." Minnie didn't know what to say or even fully understand what was going on, but the dining room was gone, and they were at the front door in mere footsteps. The door opened on its own, and the six of them spilled onto the porch.

Minnie gasped – there, in the grassy garden, stood her father, in his blue pajamas, holding a silver pistol and shaking in rage. She had seen that pistol only once before, when her father had threatened her grandfather, that if he ever came for Minnie again, he'd blow his nose right off. But her father was even angrier this time, almost frothing, and each word was laced with spit. "Give me back my daughter this instant!"

None of the residents appeared to be vaguely threatened. Goofy twiddled his thumbs sheepishly, afraid to look up. "Aw, shoot… I'm sorry, Master, I guess I musta got all distracted durin' the party. I didn't even feel him comin' up 'til just a minute ago."

Mickey waved a dismissive hand, letting the matter go, and also releasing his hold on Minnie. There was no longer any trace of amusement on his face, but nor was he the frantic sort of angry Father was sporting. Mickey was… displeased, if Minnie had to place a word for it, stepping down from the porch. "I'll admit I'm pretty impressed ya found the way here. But ya haven't been invited… please leave."

"Don't take another step!" Father hissed, aiming the pistol at Mickey. "You think I don't know what's going on?! That you can marry her and get my fortune? I won't let some street rat kidnap my daughter and get away with it!" His eyes met Minnie for a moment, and he stomped his foot. "Get over here, right now!"

On fear and instinct, Minnie moved to obey, but Mickey held out a hand towards her, and she went still. "That is up to Minnie." Mickey said softly, "And she has not made her decision yet."

"Shut up!" Father shook his pistol, and two horrid noises sprang through the air – two bullets, one after the other, splashed into Mickey's chest. Minnie screamed, fleeing the protective comfort of the servants, and threw her arms around her beloved – but there were no wounds. His clothing hadn't even been marked.

Despite the miracle, she still hung onto him, shielding Mickey as much as she could. "Don't hurt him!"She yelled, breath hitched as tears were ready to arrive. "Father, please!"

"Move, Minerva!" There was the sound of the pistol clicking, getting ready to fire another shot. "You're coming home, even if I have to blow off your arms and legs!"

Minnie went still at that. He was going to shoot her if that meant he could bring her back home. She opened her eyes, and over Mickey's shoulder, she could see Pluto – her loyal pet – Goofy – the funny gentle giant – Donald – the helpful attendant – and Daisy – the romantic aide. They all were watching her, not leaving the porch. She then looked to Mickey, who smiled down at her, his gaze all knowing and all loving once more.

Everything became very clear for her in that moment.

"I am home." She said, her voice quiet, letting her arms fall at her side. "You have to leave now."

"Minerva, I - " His voice caught in his throat as Minnie turned around. Her eyes were red. Blood red. That was impossible, when, how –

"My name is Minnie… and you haven't been invited." Minnie lifted a single hand up to the sky, and the moonlight extended her shadow until it crawled on top of her father. Before he could get another shot out, dark arms and hands came out of the shadow, grabbing at Father, clutching and clinging at him and no matter how hard he twisted or where he shot, they wouldn't let him go. The dark hands were everywhere, covering every inch of him. He couldn't even screamed, for they covered and grabbed at his mouth, his nose and his eyes, dragging him downward, covering him in their darkness, swallowing him up, until there was just her shadow. Nothing else there, just her shadow.

Minnie lowered her hand, and faced Mickey, meeting his smile with one of her own. "I owe you a dance, Master."

He linked arms with her. "As long as you let me lead, my Minnie."

~*~

Father opened his eyes, and he was in his bedroom. He didn't dare move, thinking any moment those hands would be upon him. As morning dawned on him, he caught his breath. A dream… a nightmare, that's what it had been. Exhaling deeply, he sat up in bed, only to see that his wife wasn't in bed with him. Had she already gotten up to make Minerva's breakfast?

Then noise hit him – wailing, crying, anguish of a voice that belonged to his wife. He followed the sound with hesitance, until he was standing in the doorway of Minerva's bedroom. There was his wife, on her knees, clutching the bed sheets while her body wracked with sobs. Heart beating hard enough to be felt in his head, Father stepped forward. "What in the world is going on!"

Mother pounded the bed with her fists, unable to look at her husband. "She's dead! She's dead! Minerva is dead!"

No – impossible – incredulous – but as Father moved his head towards the figure laying in the bed, there was no way to deny the stillness of who lay there.

~*~

I invite you to my mansion.

Will you accept my invitation?

The End.
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Comments: 40

bluetita [2022-01-28 07:12:50 +0000 UTC]

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HannajimaShields [2013-09-15 21:00:01 +0000 UTC]

This is amazing and didnt see that coming its amazing!

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ScaryCatish [2012-12-11 01:18:14 +0000 UTC]

I love this story, especially the ending!

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bolivianchica [2012-07-03 05:27:16 +0000 UTC]

Thaty was beautiful i enjoy reading anything you write!!

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REMMI-CHAN [2012-04-09 23:22:54 +0000 UTC]

that was such an awesome ending! did minnie die?

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hypermegatailsfan In reply to REMMI-CHAN [2012-04-09 23:27:18 +0000 UTC]

that's up to you to decide

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REMMI-CHAN In reply to hypermegatailsfan [2012-04-09 23:35:44 +0000 UTC]

you are so awesome!

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TimberlineWolf [2012-04-08 03:52:41 +0000 UTC]

you really should consider continuing this from here
i'd be fascinated to see who Minnie would invite
mabey she could invite Oswald and Ortensia XD

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hypermegatailsfan In reply to TimberlineWolf [2012-04-08 12:38:02 +0000 UTC]

I actually am working on a sequel/prequel! it's called Her Haunted Mansion : Emily's Journey, and the first chapter is already up.

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TimberlineWolf In reply to hypermegatailsfan [2012-04-08 13:45:24 +0000 UTC]

actually that's what made me this in the first place XD
and while i'm enjoying and anticipating thats well, i had something slightly different in mind
having a sequel/not prequel, where we see what Minnie does with her new life, or death as the case might be

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MythAreReal [2012-04-07 19:37:32 +0000 UTC]

Bravo Bravo!!! I love the story. As a romantic, I found this story breath taking. It sent shivers down my spine. Keep up this amazing talent!

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hypermegatailsfan In reply to MythAreReal [2012-04-07 19:47:12 +0000 UTC]

thanks much!

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SunflowersXViolets12 [2012-04-07 02:33:47 +0000 UTC]

This...is...awesome!! I felt chills when I read this. Especially when the mother found Minnie dead. She gave her life to Mickey... X33 My goodness, I love this story! XD

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hypermegatailsfan In reply to SunflowersXViolets12 [2012-04-07 02:50:11 +0000 UTC]

thanks much

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meowmeowkitty4 [2012-03-28 14:27:15 +0000 UTC]

they were all probably spirits/souls and when Mickey invited Minnie, he didn't invite HER, he invited her SOUL. And when she excepted she became free. Free from everything and everybody. That's what I think the story sums up to. By the way, I loved it!!! Good job!

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hypermegatailsfan In reply to meowmeowkitty4 [2012-03-28 14:29:12 +0000 UTC]

the story is open to every interpretation, so you're right in your on way thanks for reading

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ChristianCosmo [2012-03-28 02:58:57 +0000 UTC]

Wow... O-O . Okay wow, so when she went she died?

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hypermegatailsfan In reply to ChristianCosmo [2012-03-28 03:17:43 +0000 UTC]

that's up to you to decide

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ChristianCosmo In reply to hypermegatailsfan [2012-03-28 20:57:40 +0000 UTC]

O-O Okay.

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Kurenai-Hio [2012-03-28 01:55:53 +0000 UTC]

Holy cracker bananas....

This story had me tangled in the words from the get-go.

I am just utterly speechless, shocked, awed and a little sad that the story had to end.

The ending....oh, the ending is so beautiful, yet enticing to one with an imagination. Though, I could not have imagined that little twist on the end, I was tearing up over on my side here.

This story? A-maz-ing.

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hypermegatailsfan In reply to Kurenai-Hio [2012-03-28 02:07:49 +0000 UTC]

Thanks so much, I'm glad you so thoroughly enjoyed it!

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minnielovesmickey [2011-08-22 23:23:57 +0000 UTC]

i guess she went to live with mickey then and her parents wont know she is alive up with him

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Adne [2011-08-09 11:42:13 +0000 UTC]

I love, love, love this story! it's both haunting and sweet the same time, giving enough space in between the two things for the reader to either lean into the one side or the other side of the story!

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PrayerGirl1 [2011-07-04 03:23:27 +0000 UTC]

So amazing!!!

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hypermegatailsfan In reply to PrayerGirl1 [2011-07-04 03:36:18 +0000 UTC]

thanks

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PrayerGirl1 In reply to hypermegatailsfan [2011-07-04 04:34:46 +0000 UTC]

Welcome!!

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tintin190 [2011-04-30 05:16:10 +0000 UTC]

woah, cool and creepy, romantic, funny and disturbing. I love it X)

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hypermegatailsfan In reply to tintin190 [2011-04-30 20:26:12 +0000 UTC]

Thanks

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Roachbreath [2011-04-27 03:02:13 +0000 UTC]

OOooooooooh what a chilling ending! I love the way you've left so much up in the air and allowed your readers to come to their own conclusions, it's a very cool way of handling a story. Your writing is so masterful to begin with, so this was such an added treat. I for one don't think Mickey is all good...I think he does help those who need him (and strangely enough those on the brink of death, it seems) but I believe he has selfish reasons. The way all the events played out, well, everything turned out perfectly in his favor didn't it?

Bravo!!

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hypermegatailsfan In reply to Roachbreath [2011-04-27 03:07:01 +0000 UTC]

I like to think that no matter that the universe or incarnation, Mickey isn't 100% good, and has his own selfish desires. That's what makes him so likable, cause he's an everyman... er, everymouse.

thanks very much, glad you enjoyed it

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Roachbreath In reply to hypermegatailsfan [2011-05-01 15:16:07 +0000 UTC]

Aww 'everymouse' haha. I get what you mean though.

You're very welcome! As always.

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palmsj [2011-04-26 00:57:05 +0000 UTC]

Wow. Just... wow. That was simply amazing. I can sincerely say that that was one of the best fanfictions I have ever read... for any pairings or subjects. The way you described everything with detail, and left a lot of things hanging, simple amazing. And of course I cannot leave out my favourite part, the ending. When you repeated the invitation, it was simply a magnificent ending to an even more magnificent story. I simply cannot wait for more stories like these with Mickey and Minnie.

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hypermegatailsfan In reply to palmsj [2011-04-26 01:07:41 +0000 UTC]

Aw, a comment like that'll make me blush! I'm glad you enjoyed it. I was a little worried about ending it like that, but I still wanted to do it... so i'm glad you liked that too! Thanks a lot for all the kind words!

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WarriorRainbow [2011-04-21 21:52:25 +0000 UTC]

The story is both interesting and disturbing.
I feel that it is not clear who is good here and who is bad.

Her parents are terrible, yet they're still her parents. And Mickey as her "saviour" makes me feel that something is wrong. He's got some demonic overtone in himself. On one hand, he acts as a normal person - not too serious and showing normal emotions unlike her parents ( quote "I dunno how ya stand it, I'd go nuts") - he is kind to other people, arrive when they need help, have visible feeling for Minnie. But on the other hand, when he asked her to stay with him in the mansion, it sounded much more like making a deal than proposal (to say so). Making a choice with no possibility of quiting it, a some kind of pact. With someone who you don't even know well, but you can't resist that person. Each time before he acted in the way - something for something, granting your wish for doing something.

And everytime he arrived with invitation to people, they were on the verge of death. Question : were they dying when he came, or else they died because he came?

Minnie met the raven in her grandfather's garden. It makes me wonder if Mickey hat any connections to him. It's as if her parents were trying to somehow 'protect' her (in a very twisted way) from someone. Her illness could be just a coincidence, but what if not? And there is no doctor mentioned (if I'm correct), only her parents say so. But she acts and feels (in my opinion) as someone having tuberculosis.

Minnie is in fact the one who starts the whole series of events - she summons Mickey by saing "I'd rather die outside than be sick in here a million years!". (Later it turns out that she really dies.) So he comes to her and makes her curious. She must come to him first and then he gives her invitation, a second option - that she doesn't have to spent the rest of her life closed in her room.

She tries to talk to her parents the final time. And they crush her hope and leave her locked in her room. Maybe they tried to stop her from going to that man, maybe they knew something she didn't? Maybe this's a crazy idea what I say, but there is so little information here that everything is possible.

Mickey sends her another invitaion. She accepts. Inside the carriage he tells her to sleep - and she does so. Some magic?
And when she is inside the mansion, Mickey leaves for some time, without really saying why, so she can get to know others. She befriends them or they befriend her? Difficult to say, but again it seems to be a part of the plan. Now she has one more reason to stay.
And finally her father appears. And this final confrontation helps her to make decision. Before her are two worlds, two way so different - and she choses the one she thinks is better for her. Before the appearance of her father she wasn't decided. Now she is.
So it can be said that Mickey won - he's got what he wanted.

Maybe I overimaginated things Maybe the things that are left unsaid make this story more interesting.

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hypermegatailsfan In reply to WarriorRainbow [2011-04-21 22:04:09 +0000 UTC]

... Holy shit. This may be one of the biggest/longest/best comments a work of mine has ever gotten. I'm not quite sure I deserved this. Let me just tell you I am deeply flattered by all the thought you put into this, I am greatly honored.

However, in regards to all of your great questions... I simply can't say. I wrote it this way so readers could interpret these events in whatever way they pleased. Good, evil, what Mickey is, what exactly happened, it's all up to you and however you see it. It's like the Haunted Mansion/Tower Of Terror in the disney parks... we are given glimpses into the 'lives' of the spirits there, but never given their full stories.

Thank you very much for this simply amazing comment, I wish I'd actually done something to deserve it!

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WarriorRainbow In reply to hypermegatailsfan [2011-04-22 21:21:47 +0000 UTC]

Oh, come on! I think you're really good at writting! And I like thinking about stories, I'd say that sometimes I think too much, but it's usually easy for me. Most of what I wrote you just came to me, so it wasn't a problem.

I understand that you can't explain anything cause that's the factor which makes the story so interesting. I made two stories in which even I wouldn't know the full explanatory (that was my main idea), however in time I created some explanation But not fully, at least.

This story reminded me of musical "Dance of the Vampires". Maybe one of the reasons was the fact that I listened to polish soundtrack sometime before reading.

I haven't been to Disneyland, but I'm going to visit Disneyland in Paris during trip to Spain. So then I'll see them! (I'm plannig to me a list which attractions visit and which not )

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hypermegatailsfan In reply to WarriorRainbow [2011-04-22 21:29:47 +0000 UTC]

Aw, thank you.

I'm actually a fan of that musical! I saw a production of it thanks to youtube, and the songs are so beautifully haunting. I love musicals in general, and I find a lot of inspiration from them.

Oh, lucky you! I hope you have fun

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WarriorRainbow In reply to hypermegatailsfan [2011-04-22 22:01:49 +0000 UTC]

Yes, the musicals - and let's admit, almost everything - can be used to get inspiration.
Thank's too!

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JrocksAnime [2011-04-20 05:16:29 +0000 UTC]

Cool! and creepy. It's even more chilling because of the fact that it's never explained exactly what they, the ones at the mansion, are. My guess is some odd form of a ghost/demon hybrid.

You should write more full length stories. I'd definitely read them.

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hypermegatailsfan In reply to JrocksAnime [2011-04-20 13:28:25 +0000 UTC]

I chose not to explain them so readers could interpret it however they like Just like the Haunted Mansion/Tower of Terror rides, where often they don't explain the origins of the spirits and we take guesses.

I'd like to write more full-length stuff. But a lot of my stuff is still in process, as I try to connect scenes together. I was able to do this so quickly because I had already planned out what was going to happen, one scene right after the other.

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