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Okay, let me start that being here was certainly interesting; that was for damn sure. When Mr. Popo asked for assistance and I was picked to help him, I was certainly more than a little shocked. To help the guardian of Earth—even if he was the new guardian—was a huge honor. But…apparently it came with a few quirks. First off: the little Namekian became fond of me almost as soon as I landed on the lookout. Then again, he was only ten years old. Being the innocent, little thing that Dende was, he was able to get away with various things that adults—or even teenagers—might not be able to get away with without a couple of bruises and bumps from me. Prime example: he liked to sleep with his head in between my breasts.

He said that they were fluffy and had a lot more cushion than what he thought other Earth women had. Mind you, he’d only seen Chi-Chi, Bulma and Android 18. You see, the thing is, is that I’m a little chunky. Not incredibly obese, but I certainly wasn’t small like the formerly mentioned women. So I was a bit more ‘fluffy’ to people than them.

I often wondered if all Namekians were as blunt as this little guy was or if this was just one of Dende’s adorable little quirks. The only other one that I had seen was Piccolo, and he seemed to hate everyone but Gohan. So I was a bit hesitant to approach the large, green man. If you want me to be perfectly honest, I had a bit of thing for the strong, silent type. Something that Piccolo had fit perfectly to a ‘T’. Or, I suppose, to a ‘P’. Whenever he spoke to me—or anyone and I was within ear shot—I would get all weak-kneed and embarrassed. His voice was so deep and sexy…hell, if I’m going to be honest with myself, he might be able to get me off just by talking dirty to me for long enough. Or maybe even just by talking to me for too long, period.

I suppose Dende had begun to notice my strange behavior around Piccolo, because he approaches me today, looking more determined than I had seen him in a while. “(Name), I have a question for you.” He asks me, his look of determination combining with his obvious confusion.

“Yes, my little green bean?” I question him, sitting up from my laid back position against my wall and pinching his cheek slightly. He chuckles and playfully smacks away my hand. Only I was allowed to call him that or do those things to him. I couldn’t help but feel a bit happy that Dende was fond enough of me that much that I got special privileges.

“I’ve…been observing your behavior for a while now and I’m curious: why don’t you just tell Piccolo how you feel about him?” He asks, bluntly, his expression telling me just how serious and curious this little Namekian was.

I can’t help but sigh, scratching the back of my head. “I highly doubt that even if I did tell him, that he would respond well to it, little man. There’s no way that he has any sort of interest in me.”

“How do you know if you haven’t tried it yet?” He asks me, his expression turning to pure curiosity. He crawls into my lap, still looking up at me. This forces me to smile a small bit.

“I just do Dende. Call it woman’s intuition.” I respond, looking down. The little Namekian sighs quietly at my response.

“Women’s intuition is obviously an avoidance answer…” He mutters, setting his head on my breasts. I chuckle quietly and begin to stroke his antennae gently. The little alien smiles and leans his head back fully, eyes closed in sheer bliss. He had always liked having me stroke his antennae and ears when he wanted to go to sleep. It worked better than a freaking lullaby. His eyes are shut but he isn’t asleep. I can tell from how his breathing is still broken up every now and again instead of the classic slow, almost nonexistent rhythm that he acquired when asleep.

“…Do you think you could tell me the real reason?” He questions, his eyes still closed. For whatever reason though, he tilts his head back with his eyes still closed, as if meaning to look at me but not doing it.

“Why the hell are you so stuck on this Dende?” I ask him, staring down at him almost incredulously. He was really stuck on this wasn’t he?

“…I…just don’t like seeing you act like this. Every time you look at him, or even if you’re near him, you have this sad smile on your face…I don’t like it. It doesn’t fit to have such a sad expression on such a happy and pretty face like yours…” He says, smiling sweetly up at me. I can’t help but laugh and blush at the compliment. Little sweet talker.

“Pretty huh?” I question, tilting my head slightly.

“Yeah. You’re really pretty.”

“Well I thought that Namekians reproduced asexually. Doesn’t that imply that you don’t have a sex drive? How can you find someone else…well, anything?” I question, my eyebrow raised in my obvious confusion. He exhales—as if I’m supposed to know about Namekian anatomy, I just make sure you have water!

“To put it simply, we’re able to switch through our genders. Though I suppose, your race would categorize us as hermaphrodites. At least until we reach puberty.” I can’t help but stare at him, even more confused than I was before. Dende sighs again. “Okay. When we reach puberty, we’ll either take on a specific gender or stay hermaphrodites so we can reproduce asexually. Say…one of us is isolated. We stay unisex or have both genders; this also makes us most likely to just lay eggs if we want to reproduce. You know how I’m almost always around someone at one point or another? Since most people will look at me and call me male, I’ll enter that mindset and my body is most likely to adapt those organs.” I can’t help but stare at him in surprise.

“…You’re species is a really strange one, green bean.” I murmur, leaning my head back and closing my eyes. I hear him grunt as he leans back fully.

“Coming from the one whose species condemns, ostracizes and won’t even think about pairing up with someone based solely upon their looks.” After a few moments of silence I raise both my eyebrows in thought and nod. He wasn’t wrong.

“Okay. Fair point, green bean.” He chuckles quietly and smiles up at me. Soon enough, the two of us doze off, leaning back against the wall. When I awaken, I see the one person that I had hoped wouldn’t be there. Piccolo is standing nearby, his arms crossed over his chest as he looks at the two of us. Dende groans as he sits up and sees his fellow Namekian.

“Mm…hey Piccolo…” He replies, rubbing his eyes slightly.

“Dende. Popo told me to find you. He doesn’t seem too happy with you…” Dende groans quietly. Dende had a habit of shirking his guardian duties.

“Of course he is…” Dende mumbles, standing up and walking away, sending me a wink when I realize that he’s leaving me alone with Piccolo. “Take her with you training if you would. She’s been shirking her training as of late and if anyone can get her back into it, it’s you.” Piccolo glances at me momentarily before he nods his head. “Thanks.” Dende smirks widely at the glare I send him before walking out of the room.

“C’mon. I’m not going to wait all day for you.” Piccolo says, walking out the room when I get up. I rush after him as he takes long strides. He obviously had no intention of leaving me otherwise he would’ve taken off the instant he could. He stops at the edge of the lookout, staring down at the clouds and waiting until I reach his side. I squeak as I’m picked up in his strong arms, holding onto his shirt. “It’s just simpler to carry you. As opposed to waiting for you to catch up every five minutes.” He says, looking away from me. Although, I swear I see a light purple blush on his face. He takes off at top speed, taking me wherever the hell he goes to train. “We’re going to fight Gohan and Goku. I was going to go alone but unfortunately I can’t ignore a guardian’s orders.” He growls out, the blush that I thought I was imagining getting bigger.

“Alright…” I say quietly and almost disappointed. When we land, the father and son duo spot us immediately, waving wildly. I wave back and instantly upon jumping out of Piccolo’s arms, I’m tackled by little Gohan. Gohan was as attached to me as Dende was. I’m not entirely sure why these kids were so attached to me: Dende I understood, he doesn’t really have a mother figure due to how he was born but Gohan has a mother already. “Hi Gohan!” I greet happily, grinning widely.

“Hey (Name)!” Gohan greets back, that classic Son grin on his face. Goku jogs up to us and smiles at me. He knew how attached Gohan was to me and actually seemed to encourage the relationship between the two of us.

“Hey (Name). Long time, no see.” Goku greets me, nodding his head with a smile. I nod back.

“It’s great to see you too Goku.” I say, hugging the taller man tightly when Gohan lets go of my legs. He hugs me back just as tightly, causing my back to crack and I can hear Piccolo grunt, a low growl coming from him.

“Aww don’t be jealous Mr. Piccolo.” Gohan starts, smiling up at him widely. “I think Ms. (Name) isn’t interested in us like you think she is. So she’s all your—”

“GOHAN!!” Piccolo shouts, interrupting him, causing the youngster to leap backwards. I look at Piccolo surprised and notice the large purple blush on his face. Gohan grins childishly at him before running back over to Goku.

“Why don’t we go train and let (Name) and Piccolo have this time to themselves?” Goku asks, walking away with Gohan. Piccolo growls again but stops when I look directly at him.

“Piccolo…?” I ask, tilting my head.

“Don’t read into it. Gohan was making a stupid joke. There is no way that I could love anyone like you.” He says, still refusing to look at me.

“…why?” I question quietly, feeling my heart clench in my chest.

“what?”

“Why? Why can’t you!? It’s not like you’re incapable of it! Is it because of my appearance!? Is that why you can’t love someone ‘like me’?! Well fuck you! I’m beautiful and if you don’t see that than fine! It’s your loss!” I shout at him, panting lightly after my small rant. He looks at me surprised before a small smile appears.

“Hm. So you do have a spine.” He says, walking up to me.

“Huh…?” I say, tilting my head in utter confusion. He leans down and locks lips with me, drawing a squeak out of me. His lips were smooth: smoother than any humans that I had kissed before. When he pulls back, a smirk has appeared on his face.

“I dislike women with no backbone. When I said ‘anyone like you’ I meant someone who was as shy and quiet as you were. Although, I suppose that was a lie because somehow I still fell for you. …I guess I was in denial.” He says, shaking his head.

“…Holy hell Piccolo, that was a lot of words for you.” I say, giggling quietly. That smirk turns into a smile.

“Yeah…well…You make me vocal I guess.” I smirk at him, raising my eyebrow. His cheeks turn purple.
“Not in that manner!” He shouts. I cover my mouth and giggle, sitting down by a tree. I gesture him to sit by me and in a bold movement, he sits in front of me and sets his head between my breasts. “Dende was right…these are comfortable…” He mumbles, shutting his eyes. I smile and begin to stroke his antennae, like I would with Dende. Piccolo grunts and his eyes snap open as a blush appears again.

“What? What is it?” I question, continuing the stroke his antennae.

“Let go.” He demands, the blush increasing before I hear him let out a small moan. I blush and let go of his antennae.

“What the hell? Dende doesn’t have that reaction!” I shout, blushing heavily.

“Dende is ten years old and sees you as a mother figure so he wouldn’t think of it as a pleasurable spot in that manner…” He explains, blushing even harder. I can’t help a mischievous smirk from appear on my face before I go back to stroking his antennae. He groans quietly and leans his head back further. After a few seconds I take the antennae in my mouth, sucking lightly on it while the hand that was occupying it strokes his ears. He grunts and thrusts up, groaning particularly loudly. I see a tannish liquid coming from his pants. Did…he just cum? I blink in surprise, pulling back so his antennae falls out of my mouth. Wow. He did it so much it came through the fabric of his pants. I run my finger across the surface, licking it away. It tastes sweet: like cream or sugar. Piccolo grunts. ‘Human’s really do eat disgusting things…” He grumbles, his eyes closing as he pants heavily. I giggle.

“But you still love me.” He sits up and grabs my wrist, pinning me to the tree. I blush heavily as I look up at him.

“Yes I do. Now…why don’t we do a little experiment? I heard about your thoughts on my voice.” He says, smirking widely. I blink in surprise as I blush wildly.

“How do you know about that?!”

“You speak your thoughts more than you realize…” He chuckles quietly, leaning down to kiss me. Let’s just say this: he used more than his voice on me. I can’t walk—hell I can’t feel my lower half. But it was oh so worth it.