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MystMoonstruck — 'Did'n' do nuffin wrong! Musta been Kittycat!'
Published: 2016-08-20 10:03:29 +0000 UTC; Views: 176; Favourites: 20; Downloads: 1
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I swear that Honey Bear could look sooo guilty at times! Or, maybe his deer-in-the-headlights look made it seem that way.When I bought the red stuffed cat with the squeaker in its tail, I never realized how much he was going to love it. It was a last-minute impulse purchase at Dollar Tree, and I thought how perfect it would be for Honey Bear. He slept with it so much that it sort of nudged Tiger out of No. 1 toy. On that final night, when he got sick, it was mostly on Kittycat. He seemed so distressed though I told him that he didn't do anything wrong, poor baby. So, I hurriedly washed the toy with hot water then tossed it into the dryer. He seemed relieved to see it, and he again used it for his pillow.
It tears up my heart to recall the pain he went through that night. I really believe it must have been his heart; and, if he had to leave us, I'm relieved that it was rather quickly. Each time he had an attack, I would hold him in my arms, cradling his little head, rocking and sobbing, wishing I could take his pain from him. I knew then that he wasn't going to get better and that something was terribly wrong. Those wide eyes never closed, as if he wanted to see the world~perhaps his human mommy~till the end. When I knew it was over, it was so painful to lose him, yet it was good that he had left this suddenly pain-filled body to travel over the Rainbow Bridge. People have said that he might have been met by Tiny Tommy, and, if I ever can sketch again, I'd love to do a drawing of those two remarkable little fellows who made such an impact on us, Wouldn't that be so cute~the two of them playing together?
I'm sorry to have rattled on so long. It's 5 a.m., and I have to try to sleep. Last night, I dreamed of kittens, including one in which Honey Bear was all right; he hadn't died after all, and I woke up as I dreamt I was reaching for him to pick him up and cradle him again. Don't mind me. I'm just one of those crazy ol' cat ladies.
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Comments: 5
Yes, he was. We really were torn up over losing this sweet little foundling. He'd been with us a month, and he went downhill so fast. The vet said that it probably was his heart, which was my guess, too.
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Honey Bear and Tiny Tim will always be with us as long as we remember them.
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I like to think of them together, as they were about the same size. I think that Tiny Tommy would have to explain things to Honey Bear, as we felt that they were an old soul and new soul, respectively. It was as if Tommy had been here before~the way he looked at Mom and me and how familiar he seemed with the house. How did he know there was a window up there when he was on the counter?! Unerringly, he climbed over whatever he needed to, finding his way to a kitchen window. When I set him on the table in front of the "Kitty Window", he seemed so satisfied.
As for Honey Bear, EVERYTHING seemed new to him, including his bodily functions. It was difficult not to laugh when he became distressed over what his body would do at certain times. He would cry out loudly: "MEOW! MEOW! MEEEOW!" Each time, we had do assure him that he was OK as we cleaned up him and whatever else needed it. Those wide eyes would not even close in death, as if he was trying so hard to stay with us. We've decided that he might have had a heart problem or perhaps even something like heartworm. Being a feral baby, there's no telling what had happened to him.
He's left such a deep wound in my heart and mind because his death was so awful. I kept telling him that Mommy wouldn't leave him and that I wished I could take his pain away. At the last, I was sobbing and wanting his pain to be over; whatever the second bout was (his heart?), it was too much, ending his brief life. Silly me! I'm sitting here weeping and typing.
I suppose it doesn't help to know there probably will not be another kitten in our lives because Mom seems to be changing her mind. That's probably for the best, as we're both older and in ill-health. But, it was wonderful having Honey Bear to cuddle, to play with and to take care of. I look at his pictures and find it so difficult to think that it was only one month in our lives.
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