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Poetrymann — Shame
Published: 2012-12-31 22:58:06 +0000 UTC; Views: 1448; Favourites: 68; Downloads: 8
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Description Here's the bloody stain,
burden of my shame.
I breathe.
Let me bear the strain,
savior of my name.
You leave.
We have born the pain -
righteous, strong and plain,
we grieve.
There is naught to gain
in blessing or in bane.
We seethe.
I have known the blame,
felt my senses fein.
Believe
bleeding in the rain,
praying oer the slain,
I cleave
And know that I've lain
twixt madness and sane.
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Comments: 32

8Amor-phous [2016-09-10 19:05:05 +0000 UTC]

I could definitely make a song out of this... with your permission I would love to!!

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Poetrymann In reply to 8Amor-phous [2016-09-10 20:51:50 +0000 UTC]

I would love to hear it!

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

Morphine-Cloud [2013-02-03 21:36:31 +0000 UTC]

Featured : [link]

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

darknataku17 [2013-01-12 13:25:21 +0000 UTC]

Brilliant.

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

sparkbearer [2013-01-11 22:36:17 +0000 UTC]

The rhythm is wonderful, sounds very musical!

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Poetrymann In reply to sparkbearer [2013-01-12 16:43:18 +0000 UTC]

Thanks very much - I appreciate it!

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

TheDarkenedBride [2013-01-10 19:25:06 +0000 UTC]

congratulations on successfully finishing the project! I'm proud of you

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Poetrymann In reply to TheDarkenedBride [2013-01-12 16:42:47 +0000 UTC]

Thanks. There was only one I did not do...the Sestina.

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

NinjaKittyKawaii [2013-01-06 13:31:05 +0000 UTC]

When i was first reading this, I thought it was interesting but at the end, i was like, "wait...what?" This was probably because my mind is a little slow to grasp poetry and I've had too much Mountain Dew to focus. The word twixt in the last line started making me think about candy bars.

So, i reread it. And, my impression was "oh wow... This is kind of beautiful."
I also really like the form. Last year, my English teacher made my class write so many poems with fixed forms. It was difficult for me because my mind isn't wired for poetry (although, I did produce a couple i like.) And I think you did a good job with writing such a great poem with a fixed style.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Poetrymann In reply to NinjaKittyKawaii [2013-01-16 22:02:30 +0000 UTC]

Thanks. It was the hardest form I did. I did not even attempt one last years.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

NinjaKittyKawaii In reply to Poetrymann [2013-01-16 23:01:46 +0000 UTC]

You're welcome
And it does look really hard.

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

Shades-Of-Lethe [2013-01-06 08:15:54 +0000 UTC]

Executed to perfection... Great, Brendan!! Deep and excellent!

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Poetrymann In reply to Shades-Of-Lethe [2013-01-12 16:44:24 +0000 UTC]

Thanks very much - I appreciate it!

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

roamingtigress [2013-01-06 00:05:32 +0000 UTC]

Great work on the emotion here. Great read.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Poetrymann In reply to roamingtigress [2013-01-06 17:54:49 +0000 UTC]

Many thanks. I appreciate it!

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

roamingtigress In reply to Poetrymann [2013-01-06 18:37:11 +0000 UTC]

You are very welcome!

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

oviedomedina [2013-01-04 23:07:40 +0000 UTC]

Really love how this sounds!
Good job!

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Poetrymann In reply to oviedomedina [2013-01-16 22:00:45 +0000 UTC]

Many thanks - I am glad you like it.

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

DancesWithShadows [2013-01-03 06:25:00 +0000 UTC]

Sweet shit, man.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Poetrymann In reply to DancesWithShadows [2013-01-12 16:44:50 +0000 UTC]

Thanks very much - I appreciate it!

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

palleor [2013-01-02 23:14:32 +0000 UTC]

I really like this style of writing! The content brought remembrance to me of the recent school shooting. Really brought tears to my eyes. I know everyone see's and feels something different in every poem but this one I could feel and that's what I love about poetry. Great work!

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Poetrymann In reply to palleor [2013-01-15 15:03:50 +0000 UTC]

Thanks, It is one of the harder forms I have done - I did not even attempt it last year.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

palleor In reply to Poetrymann [2013-02-01 11:31:50 +0000 UTC]

Very moving. I love poetry I can feel!

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

Villenueve [2013-01-02 21:46:19 +0000 UTC]

Magnificent work my Magician of words!

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Poetrymann In reply to Villenueve [2013-01-15 15:03:08 +0000 UTC]

Thanks! I appreciate the support!

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

rlkirkland [2013-01-02 14:12:01 +0000 UTC]

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Poetrymann In reply to rlkirkland [2013-01-15 15:02:56 +0000 UTC]

Thanks! I appreciate the support!

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

Skullkid43 [2013-01-01 00:33:38 +0000 UTC]

Beautiful!Well done

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Poetrymann In reply to Skullkid43 [2013-01-15 15:00:35 +0000 UTC]

Thanks. I am glad you like it.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Skullkid43 In reply to Poetrymann [2013-01-16 07:54:38 +0000 UTC]

Your Welcome.

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

intricately-ordinary [2012-12-31 23:45:55 +0000 UTC]

Congratulations on finishing so beautifully!

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Poetrymann In reply to intricately-ordinary [2013-01-06 17:49:42 +0000 UTC]

Many thanks. I appreciate it!

👍: 0 ⏩: 0