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SplashOfHappy — Sexy Smoking
Published: 2010-07-20 15:28:39 +0000 UTC; Views: 2391; Favourites: 8; Downloads: 4
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smoking is bad. except if you're george harrison.made with i can has cheezeburger
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Comments: 50
George... sexy smoking. I always say if I found a time machine, i'd slap a cigarette out of his hand and ominously say "LUNG CANCER." But he's so sexy when he smokes.
SHOULD I SACRIFICE THE SEXINESS FOR A LONGER GEORGE LIFE?!
...
choices.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
ROFL!!! i'm glad i could make you laugh. and yeah, dark humor is kind of my thing, so... lol!
i dont know what i would do. he looks so darn good with a cigarette in his mouth, BUT, he probably could have lived longer...idunno...
id LIKE to say i would tell him to stop, but that would be very dishonest of me. xD
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
CLAP FOR YOU, DARK HUMOR! CLAP FOR YOU!! haha x3
I know, it's just... irresistable.
George: We can't kiss with a cigarette in my mouth, Kayla.
Me: YES WE CAN!!!
George: 
I would've liked George to live longer, I would've had more time to hit on him.
AND YES, I APPRECIATE YOU BEING HONEST!! IT'S BEATLE FAN HONOR WE MUST STICKETH TO!
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
LMFAO! i HATE smoking, my grandparents do it and its gross. but george...gah, he just totally pulls it off.
i know! more opportunities definitely. i dont care if he got old, if i saw him...
Me: GEORGE FREAKIN HARRISON! YOU SMOKE SEXY!
George: I WHAT?
Me: You smoke sexy. just hold a cigarette in your mouth, will you?
George: Ummmm....*puts a cigarette in his mouth*
Me:
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
hahahhahahah!!! I have this joke that I'd marry Dhani Harrison, and it's a story of love and redemption.
Dhani: Kayla, I love you so much.
Me: DAWW! I love you too, George!
Dhani: Wait... What?!
Me: I said I love you Ge--Dhani! I LOVE YOU DHANI!
Dhani:
Me:
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
ROFL! that would probably be my reaction too! i dont have any little dialogue to along with it though...so you do another one!
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
hahah ALRIGHT. I'LL SEE WHAT I CAN DO.
*clears throat*
I have this huge thing about, as I've probably said, getting a time machine and going back to the day that George, YEAH, THAT BIRD HEAD RIGHT THERE, began to smoke.
I have now gotten the proper dialog, and reaction.
George: Well, I guess I'll try one. *takes out a cigarette*
Paul: NOTE: I DO NOT KNOW IF PAUL TURNED GEORGE ONTO SMOKING, BUT I DECIDED TO MAKE IT PERSONAL!! Alright. I'll get my lighter. *takes out a lighter*
Time Machine: *WHIRLS IN, AND LANDS ON TOP OF GEORGE'S GUITAR*
George:
Me: *opens the time machine door, complete with strobe lights, and fog*
Paul: WHAT THE BLOODY BLEEP?! I'm keeping it G rated.
Me: *emerges from the time machine as that little space march thing plays*
George and Paul:
Me: GEORGE HAROLD HARRISON!!
George: YES?!
Me: *walks over*
George: *shaking*
Paul:
Me: *smacks ciggie out of his hand* LUNG CANCER!! LUNG CANCER!!
George:
Paul: *thinking* What the hell's lung cancer?!
Me: *goes back into time machine, and takes off*
George and Paul:
Paul: Whoa man... you alright?
George: Paul... the crap has literally been scared outta me.
Paul: 
George: What?
Paul: A MARLBORO CIGARETTE!!
George: AWWRIGHT! *lights up*
**IN THE PRESENT**
Me: IS GEORGE STILL ALIVE?! DID IT WORK?!
You: LET'S SEE!!
Me and You: *google it*
Google: GEORGE HARRISON IS DEAD. YOU FAILED, YOU FRIZZY IDIOT.
Me: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
ROFLMFAO!!! i love it, my turn! here's how it would go if i'd been the one in the time machine.
Me: *walks slowly out of time machine, in an extremely dramatic fashion* *says in deep low voice* GEORGE....HAROLD...HARRISON....
George: WHAT?! WHAT? WHO ARE YOU!
Me: I have been sent by GiraffePeace to make sure you don't die from lung cancer.
Geroge: LUNG cancer? What are you talking about?
Me: I am supposed to do this: *knocks his cigarette out of his hands and stomps on it*
George: Hey!
Me: *laughs cheerfully* But hey, I could never do that, buddy! You're way too awesome looking when you smoke. *whips out another cigarette, lights it and gives it to him* *pats him on the shoulder* Keep on smoking sexily, partner! *ascends into time machine and warps back into real time*
You: WELL?! WELL?! WHAT HAPPENED?
Me: Oh, i did just what you said.
You: *sighs relieved* that's good! He'd better be alive now!
Me: Uh-just take my word for it!
You: *googles it*
Google: GEORGE HARRISON DIES OF LUNG CANCER.
You: WHAT DID YOU DO?!!!!
i'm a baaaaddd girl
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
NOOOOO!!! NOOOOOO!! NOOOOO!!!
WE MUST CONTINUE THIS.
You: Well, you did say that he was sexy smoking, so there ya go!
Me: NO! I'D FIND HIM MORE SEXY ALIVE!!
You: I also did it for me.
Me: THE LOVE OF MY LIFE IS DEAD!
You: He already was!
Me: AHHHHHHHHH!!!!
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
ROFL!! keep it going....
You: THERE'S ONLY ONE WAY TO FIX THIS!
Me: What's that?
You: We BOTH have to go back and convince him to stop smoking! Maybe he'll believe both of us!
Me: BUT--BUT, I CAN'T DO THAT!
You: FORGET ABOUT HIS SEXINESS FOR JUST A MOMENT, ALRIGHT?! WE'RE GOING BACK, AND THIS TIME YOU'RE NOT GOING TO MESS IT UP!
Me:
*zaps back into alive-george time*
George: NOT AGAIN!
You: It is us. Again. We both failed our mission the first time, so we're trying again.
Paul: This is getting seriously weird. George, do you wanna-
Me: JAMES PAUL MCCARTNEY! IS THAT A CIGARETTE I SEE IN YOUR HAND?
Paul: Wha-um, yeah...
Me: *snatches it and throws it over shoulder* DO YOU WANT TO DIE LIKE GEORGE DID?!
Paul: What?!
Me: No more smoking for you, MISTER. If you want to live to be at least 68 and still be touring around the world, then i suggest you stop that disgusting habit.
You: You go, girl!
Paul: But I can't just-
Me: YOU HEARD ME! IF YOU DON'T STOP SMOKING, YOU WON'T SHOW UP AT RINGO'S 70TH BIRTHDAY CONCERT AND PLAY THE SONG 'BIRTHDAY' LIVE FOR THE FIRST TIME EVER!
Paul: How does she KNOW all this?!
Me: *leans in close* I don't smoke. So I'm still alive.
You: Ahem, you know we are primarily here for GEORGE'S sake.
Me: Oh. Right. George...um...I hate to have to say this but...
You: SAY IT!
Me: Um...you shouldn't....OH WHO I AM I KIDDING, SMOKE ALL YOU WANT! IN FACT, HERE'S A PACK OF MARLBOROS! LIGHT ONE UP RIGHT NOW!
You:
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
HAHAHAHHH!!
Me: George, please listen to me.
George: What?
Me: I love you, a lot.
George: You do? No girl has ever said that to me before.
You: What?!
Me: *whispers* DUH BETHANY. IT'S NOT BEATLEMANIA YET. SO LET ME WORK HERE.
You:
Paul: NUU!
You: I SAY GIVE IT TO ME!
You and Paul: *argue*
Me: But I genuinely do George. You're a great guy. Writing songs, caring about others... but you die a early death in 2001 because you smoked. Think of all the people you could've helped, George. You didn't even get to finish some of your album.
George: 
Paul: *still arguing with you*
You: *pulls on Paul's hair*
Paul: *gives you ligter*
You: *kiss Paul*
Paul:
Me:
George: You're really nice, Kayla.
Me: We should go out, y'know.
George: I'd love that!
Me:
George:
You: ALRIGHT. WORK HERE IS DONE, KAYLA. LET'S GO!
Me: NUUUUUUU!! I CAN'T LEAVE MY GEORGIE!!
George: No! Kayla can't leave me!!
You: Kayla, George will probably marry you in the future. GEEZ.
Me: OH YEAH! BYYYYEE GEORGIEE!!
George:
Me: YOU'RE A GREAT DAD! BUT WE'RE NOT NAMING HIM DHANI! REMEMBER THAT!
George: BUT I LIKE THAT NAME!
Me: DON'T DO IT GEORGE!
George: OKAY.
Me and You: 2010... AWWWAYYYYY!!
Time Machine: *ZAAPP*
**OUR TIME, 2010**
Me: GOOGLE IT! GOOGLE IT!!
You: Alright... *types it in*
Google: GEORGE HARRISON ALIVE AND HEALTHY WITH WIFE KAYLA HARRISON AND SON, DHANI HARRISON.
Me: WHAT?! I TOLD HIM NO!!
You: You probably gave in to the sexy, Kayla.
Me: YOU'RE RIGHT!
You: ALRIGHT! LETS SEE ABOUT ME AND PAULIE!!
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
ROFLMFAO!!! i laughed so freakin hard. i loved it, i loved it i LOVED IT!!! especially the bit about me and paulie
too bad i don't have any ideas for another one with me and paul.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
WELL YOU'RE LUCKY BECAUSE I'M AN IDEA CHILD!!!
*cracks knuckles*
Me: Alright, Bethany. I'LL LET YOU SEE ABOUT PAUL, ON ONE CONDITION!!
You: WHAT?!
Me: ...CALL ME KAYLA HARRISON!
You: What?!
Me: THAT IS NOW MY NAME ACCORDING TO GOOGLE!!
You: SCREW GOOGLE!
Me: You want me to look up Paulie or NOT?!
You: FINE! PLEASE LOOK UP PAULIE, KAYLA HARRISON.
Me:
Google: *loads*
You: WHAT'S TAKING SO LONG?!! *shakes computer* COME ON!!
Me: DON'T BREAK IT!!
You:
Me: Paul McCartney married Bethany McCartney, and they had 30 kids, all named after Paul. Then, George and Kayla whooped their butts in the best beatle marriage competition because their love is REAL.
You:
Me:
You: YES! HAHA!! YES!!! YES!!! YESS!!!!!! I TOLD HIM TO WORK FOR 6 KIDS!!
Me: ... MAN. GEORGE AND I ONLY HAVE ONE. I wonder if Dhani gets lonely...
**DHANI HARRISON**
Dhani: AND THAT'S HOW MY DAY WAS. *to his goldfish, Kenny*
Kenny: GLUB GLUB GLUB
Dhani: NO, MY MOM AND DAD ARE BUSY.
Kenny: GLUB GLUB?!
Dhani: YOU DON'T THINK THEY ARE--
Kenny: GLUB.
Dhani: AHHHHH!!!
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
ROFL! POOR DHANI! thats so pathetic and hilarious at the same time xD
Me: Wow, SIX KIDS! We have our work cut out for us!
You:
Me: Hey, did Paul ever stop smoking?
You: I'll google it!
Me: DO SO!
You: let me just put in...did paul mccartney ever stop feeding himself lung cancer twenty times a day.
Me:
You: FINE! *types in does paul mccartney still smoke*
Me: WHATS IT SAY! WHATS IT SAY!
You: Um, Bethany...
Me: TELL ME! TELL ME TELL ME! AND MOVE, I CAN'T SEE THE MONITOR!
You: I think its best if i just take this...*starts to pick up computer*
Me: *knocks you over and squints at monitor*
Google: JUST IN CASE YOU'RE WONDERING, BETHANY, NO, PAUL NEVER DID STOP SMOKING. NO MATTER HOW MANY TIMES YOU YELLED, KICKED, AND SPIT AT HIM, HE NEVER LISTENED. AND JUST IN CASE A YOUNGER BETHANY WHO HAS SOMEHOW GOTTEN HOLD OF A TIME MACHINE IS READING THIS, I HAVE SOME ADVICE: WHEN MEN SAY THEY ARE GOING OUTSIDE FOR SOME FRESH AIR, WHAT THEY REALLY MEAN IS THEY ARE POISONING THEIR LUNGS BEHIND YOUR BACK!
--Love, Google.
P.S.: Please, for the love of god: DON'T let him name your daughter Beatrice. The minute he even SUGGESTS that name, whack him upside the head.
Me:
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
Me: Whoa. Tough love.
You: Well, at least our children don't talk to goldfish.
Me: Dhani's just sensitive, just like his daddy.
You: Why don't you and George spend enough time with Dhani so he can stop talking to Kenny the goldfish?!
Me: We're uh...
You: WHAT?
Me: Uh... it should not be discussed.
You: NO WAY! RIGHT UNDER HIS NOSE!! WHOAA!! HAHA! Paul and I can't do that. They always walk in.
Me: Dhani walked in once...
You: WHAT'D HE DO?!
Me:
You: 
Me: Perfect diagram.
You:
Me: George still hasn't told Dhani he was a Beatle.
You: GET OUT.
Me: Yup. Still hasn't. George got all spooked when I let Dhani watch yellow submarine. Then he was all 'KAYLA! HE'LL FIND OUT!'... it was not pretty.
You: DID IT END WITH YOU AND GEORGE..
Me: SHUDDUP!! OUT WITH IT WITH YOU AND PAUL!!!
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
LOL!! POOR DHANI!! what a tortured little kid xD
You: COME ON! OUT WITH IT!
Me: Well, there isn't much to tell...
You: COURSE THERE IS! spill!
Me: Well of course Paul named the baby Beatrice anyway.
You: NO!
Me: YES. Its been awful. But I love her anyway! She's walked in on us a couple times!
You: A COUPLE TIMES? YOU'RE SCARRING THE CHILD!
Me: I KNOW! Its okay though. Paul just tells her we're keeping each other warm.
You: And she buys it?
Me: Yeah, sure!
You: Well what about your other children?
Me: 
You: WERE YOU ABOUT TO SAY WHAT I THINK YOU WERE ABOUT TO SAY?!
Me: LET ME SAY RIGHT NOW, IT HAD ABSOLUTELY NOTHING TO DO WITH THE KITCHEN TABLE!
You:
Me: SERIOUSLY! SO DON'T EVEN BRING THAT UP BECAUSE WE HAVE NEVER, EVER MADE OUT ON THE KITCHEN TABLE!
You:
Me: Or on his desk. And definitely not the counter. And ESPECIALLY not on the washing machine!
You:
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
WHOAAAA! YOU AND PAUL ARE BUSSSYYYY!!
Me: WHILE THE MACHINE WAS OFF OR ON?!
You: BOTH!
Me: AHA!
You: We try!
Me: George and I... we just chill, in his recording studio.
You: I SEE!!
Me: Nope, not like that!
You: UH HUH. A LIKELY STORY.
Me: WE DO NOT!
You: TELL ME EVERYTHING!
Me: Well, it all starts when he gets that guitar out...
You: Yes, I know how you can't resist that...
Me: AND HIS EYEBROWS...
You:
Me: AND THEN TO TOP IT ALL OFF HE SITS REALLY CLOSE, AND BEGINS TO PLAY 'SOMETHING'!!!
You: WHOA.
Me: YES! YES! YES!
You: Whoa...George is romantic.
Me: NOW SPILL THE DEETS ON YOU AND PAUL. I MUST TAKE NOTES.
You:
Me: WHAT?!
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
Daww, Georgie!
Me: I'M NOT LETTING YOU COPY OFF MY LOVE LIFE!
You: Fine. I won't copy. But you still hafta tell!
Me: All right, all right! what do you want to know?
You: EVERYTHING!
Me: NO. NOT EVERYTHING. YOU'D BE DISTURBED AND HAVE TO GO TO A MENTAL FACILITY. AND I DON'T WANT THAT ON MY CONSCIENCE!
You: its really that bad?
Me: BAD!? HECK NO! its just...not appropriate to discuss!
You: So is Paul good then?
Me: HE'S BETTER THAN GOOD.
You: Ooooh!!! So he's GREAT!
Me: Well, what about you and Georgie? Sure he's romantic, but does he ever...you know!
You:
Me: COME ON, I TOLD YOU ABOUT THE WASHING MACHINE! Which, may i establish now, does NOT leave this room. Paul would die if he knew I told anybody!
You: All right. Well....
WELL?! TELL ALL!
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
HEHEEH GLADLY. haha Paul is great... that cracked me up!!
Me: Well, he is amazing... but the funny thing is, WE WERE EACHOTHER'S FIRSTS!!
You: DAWW THAT'S ADORABLE! WHEN?!
Me: Well, it was 1960. And we were 17.
You: YOUNGINS!
Me: HEY. WE WERE GOOD KIDS. AT LEAST WE WEREN'T LIKE PAUL! 15...
You: YOU GOT A THING AGAINST ME AND PAUL AT THE AGE OF 15?
Me: NO! 'COURSE NOT, BETHANY!
You:
Me: WELL, we met, and he was very adorable and romantic...
You: EH...EH?!!
Me: AND IT HAPPENED. IN A BATHROOM. IN HAMBURG.
You: THE MEN'S OR THE LADY'S?!
Me: THE LADY'S ROOM BECAUSE WE COULD LOCK THE DOOR!
You: AHHHH!!! YOU DIRTY CHILDREN!!!!!!!! AHHH!
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
LOL! BAD KAYLA! BAD GEORGE!
You: YEAAAP! WE WERE QUITE THE REBELS! SO WHAT ABOUT YOU AND PAUL'S FIRST?
Me: Well, we were quite, quite young. *sighs dreamily*
You: AND?!!
Me: We met at one of the Quarrymen shows. Paul came up to me and asked if I'd like to hook up.
You:
Me:
You: THAT NEVER HAPPENED.
Me: FINE. But I was just sprucing it up a bit! Well, I don't really remember how or where we met, but i DO remember what came just days after that.
You: SO?! WHERE!!
Me: our ninth grade english teacher's desk.
You: NO WAY!
Me: Way! We both were staying after for detention but our teacher never showed up. So we...you know!
You: YOU TWO! TSK TSK!
Me:
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
ANYTHING BUT THAT!!! AHHHHH!!! hhaha!!!!!
Me: WHOA!! WHOA!! And Paul came prepared for that?!
You:
Me: YOU NAUGHTY KIDS!! YOU...UNSAFE CHILDREN!!
You: AND GEORGE CAME PERPARED?!
Me: There was a dispenser.
You: IN A WOMAN'S BATHROOM?!
Me: It was in Hamburg's Red Light district. ...What'd you expect?!
You: Well, anything is possible in red light...
Me: EXACTLY.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
OHHHH! GEORGE AND KAYLA GETTING IT ON!
Me:
You: NO regrets? At all?
Me: Well...maybe not NONE...
You: WELL! WHATS YOUR REGRET!
Me: That the teacher showed up when I was...you know...you do know, don't you?
You: NO WAY! HE WALKED RIGHT IN ON YOU?!
Me:
You: Talk about embarrassing. Did you get in trouble?
Me:
You:
Me: KIDDING! NO, HE WAS FURIOUS! I GOT SUSPENDED FOR THREE WEEKS! THREE GLORIOUS WEEKS!
You: Why were they glorious?
Me: Because Paul was suspended too.
You: Aaaah. So did you two find another desk somewhere?
Me: No! Not a desk! We were a little more sophisticated than that, thank you very much.
You: So, where?
Me: The living room floor. On my great grandma's rug.
You:
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
HAHAHAAHAHAHA!! GREAT GRANDMA'S RUG!!!
Me: I see.
You: Good times we had.
Me: Yeah. Me and George are innocent little creatures.
You: SPILL IT!!
Me: ALRIGHT, ALRIGHT!
You:
Me: *clears throat* George's mom found out about it.
You: NO!
Me:
You:
Me: WELL!! So, his mom made us go to this church thing and get cleansed.
You: WHOA.
Me: Yeah. We had to sit in holy water, and people chanted. It was relaxing.
You: I thought holy water made you burn, like that one time the preacher splashed it on you!
Me: No, it got mixed up with that acid shipment.
You: OH YEAH!!!
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
ACID SHIPMENT! CLAPS FOR YOU! GENIUS, GIRL!
Me: So did George get in trouble?
You: Nah. His parents were okay after the holy acid water apparently cleansed our souls.
Me: Aaah. I see. I'm glad I was never forced to sit in holy water. I'm so NOT holy, my eyes would probably start bleeding or something.
You:
Me: Well, its true. Me and Paul were exactly the opposite of holy.
You: WELL, WELL WELL! TELL ME, YOU UNHOLY THING!
Me: I think I've told you quite enough for a while, my friend.
You: NO! NO YOU HAVEN'T! IF YOU DON'T TELL ME, I'LL RING UP PAUL AND FORCE HIM TO COME OVER HERE AND TELL ME HIMSELF!
Me: YOU WOULDN'T!
You: *dials Paul*
Me: NOOOO!!!!!
You: 
Me: WHAT DID YOU DO THAT FOR?!!! YOU'RE GOING TO HUMILIATE ME!
You:
Me:
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
Me: Well, hurry up and get everything out before Paul arrives!
You: NOPE. YOU GOTTA TELL ME SOMETHING ABOUT YOU AND GEORGE FIRST!!
Me: FINE.
You: 
Me: Once, in the cavern club...
You: YES?!
me: George and I...
You: YES?!!
Me: We...
You: OUT WITH IT!
Me: GEORGE AND I DID IT ON THE BAR!
You: WHOA! WHILE PEOPLE WERE THERE?!
Me: Nope. It was closed.
You: Hmm... not bad.
Me:
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
*shake head* you and george just kept getting dirtier and dirtier, didn't you!
You: SO, I TOLD YOU SOMETHING ABOUT GEORGE! NOW IF YOU SPILL, PAUL WON'T BE FORCED TO DO IT FOR YOU.
Me: FINE! One time...we were, uh...
You: WHAT!
Me: We, uh...
You: YOU WHAT! SPIT IT OUT ALREADY!
Me: Okay, so it was Christmas, right? The Christmas RIGHT after we were married!
You: Yeah?
Me: And...we were madly in love. Not that we aren't now, but, you know!
You: OKAY, GO ON!
Me: So, we were at my parents house...
You: NO WAY!
Me: Way.
You: WHERE! EXACTLY WHERE!
Me: Errr...
You: COME ON! I TOLD YOU ABOUT THE CAVERN CLUB THING!
Me: Fine. My dad's coffee table.
You:
Me: His really, really antique from like 1933 or something!
You: DID THE TABLE HOLD UP?!
Me: Umm...no.
You: WAS YOUR DAD ANGRY?!
Me: Well, let me show you what he was like.
You: Okay!
Me: first, he did this. Then, he did this: Then, he looked like this: And, then, finally, he did this:
You:
Me: And, then he kicked us out and said he never wanted to see us again.
You: Ahh. That makes sense. *pause*
You: You guys have a thing for tables, don't you?
Me:
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
HAHAHAHAAHAHA!! WHOA. YOU AND PAUL MY GOD.
Paul: *rings doorbell*
Me: *gets it* Go away Paul. You're not needed. *slams door in his face*
Paul: Alright...
You: So, how are you and George's kids?
Me: They're doing amazing. But, there's a surprise!!
You: WHAT?! WHAT?!
Me: IM PREGNANT!!
You: NO WAY!
Me: YUUSSHHH WAYYY.
You: So, when was it concived?
me: *thinking of George's stare *
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
YAYYYY! ANOTHER LITTLE GEORGIE! OR GEORGINA!
Me: AHH! KAYLA! JUST THINK! YOU'LL HAVE THE CHANCE TO UNDO ALL THE MISTAKES YOU MADE WITH DHANI!
You:
Me:
You: YES! CONGRATULATIONS TO US!
Me: SO HOW DID IT HAPPEN?!!??!!
You: Well, I don't know if I should tell you or not...
Me: COME ON! COME ON! COME ON! COME ON! COM-
You: ALRIGHT! ENOUGH. It happened last month...when both kids were at summer camp.
Me: I see. An opportunity like that could not goeth wasted.
You: Well, George came home from work...looking all ....and so, you know! I couldn't resist!
Me: Let me guess. He ended up all like
You: Well, not exactly...
Me:
You: OKAY, EXACTLY!
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
HAHAHAHAAHAH HE ENDED UP LOOKING ALL XD XDXD XD!!!!!
Me: I hope it's another boy. Maureen is just annoying.
You: REALLY?!
Me:
You:
Me: Well, hasn't Paul ever come home from work looking all
You:
Me:
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POOR MAUREEN!
You: DON'T LIE! HE HAS!
Me: Okay, he has. He was first all and then he was all .
You: Were you...productive?
Me: WELL, THERE ISN'T ANOTHER PAUL RUNNING AROUND, SO NO!
You: If you DID have a son, would you name it James Jr?
Me: EEW,NO. I hate that name. Paul would probably want to name him that but I'd knock the idea out of his head right away.
You: Literally?
Me: Literally.
You: You know you really should talk to someone about those anger problems of yours.
Me:
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
HAHAHAHAHA!! JAMES JR. I ditto that. xD
Me:
You: YES. YOU ARE RIGHT. So, any ideas about you and George's baby... and it IS you and George's?!
Me: Yes. John and I stopped that affair a year ago. he got with this woman called... yolko forno?
You: Yeah, the name escapes me. Well, she can't be too important. It's not like she's gonna ruin the Beatles or nothing.
Me: YEAH! Of course not!!
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
LOL! little do we know....
You: ANYWAY, yes, it is definitely George's baby!
Me: Well, how do you know?
You: Do I REALLY have to explain this to you? I thought you TOOK family life in high school!
Me: THAT'S NOT WHAT I MEANT!
You: Well, its George's. I'm sure about that.
Me: HAVE YOU THOUGHT ABOUT A NAME?!
You: No, not really... we're thinking of a couple though.
Me: OOH! OOH! I'VE GOT ONE!
You: This better not be-
Me: BETHANY!
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
HAHAHA BETHANY?! HAHA JUST KIDDING!! HAHA XD!!
Me: I was going to say Ashton...
You: For a boy, yes. BUT WHAT ABOUT A GIRL?! LET ME WELCOME YOU TO THE BETHANY NAME!!
Me: Uh, I was thinking Lucille.
You:
Me: WHAT?!
You: NOTHING.
Me: OH YEAH?! WELL WHAT ARE YOU NAMING YOU AND PAUL'S BABY?!
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
NO BETHANY?!! I AM INSULTED!
Me:
You: Well what about a girl?
Me:
You: WHAT IS IT?!
Me: If its a girl, i think we're going to name it....LOLA.
You: LOLA?!
Me: LOLA. ISN'T THAT ADORABLE?!!
You: WHY YES IT IS!! But you also have to have a boy name and you said no James.
Me: Well, Paulie isn't so bad.
You: You mean Paul?
Me: No, I mean Paulie.
You: YOU'RE SERIOUSLY GOING TO NAME YOUR BABY PAULIE JR?
Me:
You: PAULIE ISN'T EVEN A NAME! IT'S A NICKNAME!
Me: YEAH, BUT ITS ADORABLE, ISN'T IT?!
You: FOR A WHILE! WHAT ABOUT WHEN HE'S GROWN UP! WHAT IF HE BECOMES A WRESTLER OR SOMETHING! THEN THEY'LL HAVE TO INTRODUCE HIM AS THE ALMIGHTY PAULIE!
Me: I seriously doubt our Paulie is going to become a wrestler.
You: BUT JUST IN CASE!
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HAHA THE ALMIGHTY PAULIE. haha!
Me: I'm intent on making me and George's kids hippies.
You:
Me: WHAT?! I want them to be activists!
You: Paul and I want our kids to be successful in life.
Me: WHAT'S THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN?!
You: Well, if Dhani, Maureen, and that little kid inside you decide to become rebelling activist hippies, what'll happen?
Me: I DO NOT KNOW.
You: I see. BUT I THINK WHAT WE NEED TO DO IS THIS... get our kids... and make them...
Me:
You: A SINGING GROUP!!
Me: THAT'S AN AMAZING IDEA!!
You and Me:
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YES! WHAT AN AWESOMELY EPIC IDEA!
Me: BUT, WHAT WILL THEY BE CALLED?!
You: Maybe...THE PROVOKES?
Me:
You:
Me: WELL, WE'LL JUMP OFF THAT BRIDGE WHEN WE COME TO IT.
You: Uh, Bethany, I think you mean CROSS that bridge.
Me: What?
You: Never mind. *whispers* I pity your next child.
Me:
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JUMP OFF THAT BRIDGE! SOUNDS RIGHT TO ME!!
Me:
You: Same. Same.
Me:
You: NO! NOT THAT WAY. Paul has retired from those early risky days.
Me:
You: YOU HEARD ABOUT THAT?!
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YES! A PARK BENCH! PAULIE STILL GOT IT...
Me: Well, okay, that was the only-
You: And what about the time in the driveway?
Me:
You: And the windshield of his car?
Me:
You: And your front porch?
Me: OKAY! OKAY! SO HE'S STILL A LITTLE OUT THERE!
You: A LITTLE? HE'S A BEAST!
Me: Oh, alright. He's a beast. But so is George.
You:
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PERHAPS GEORGE IS A BEAST... PERHAPS NOT.
You: Come on, spill it.
Me: Well, I don't like to talk about it.
You: COME ON KAYLA!
Me: Well, YOU HAVE TO GUESS!!
You: SERIOUSLY?!
Me:
You: *cracks knuckles* Alright. Here goes.
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OKAY. ILL TRY MY BEST.
Me: I can't believe I have to guess this stuff.
You: YEP!
Me: WELL, AT LEAST GIVE ME A HINT.
You: Well, lets say it was very public.
Me: OKAY! A restaurant?
You: Nope.
Me: An amusement park?
You: Nope.
Me: Uhh...the zoo?
You: DEFINITELY NOT! WHO WANTS TO MAKE OUT IN FRONT OF A BUNCH OF WILD ANIMALS?
Me:
You: VERY PUBLIC. like...broadcast on national television public.
Me:
You: Here's a hint: It was a very famous house.
Me: THE HOUSE OF BLUES?
You: NO. ANOTHER FAMOUS HOUSE.
Me: THE WHITE HOUSE??!!
You:
Me:
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THE WHITE HOUSE.
OH YES. xDDDD!!
Me: So, looky now. ME AND GEORGE TRUMP YOU AND PAUL!!
You: Oh, not just yet, Kayla.
Me: What?
You: I'm going to tell you the most devious thing Paul and I did, and you have to swear not to let it leave this very place.
Me:
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OOOH...I BETTER MAKE IT A GOOD ONE!
Me: Well...
You: YES?
Me:
You: Aahhh. Red Light District.
Me: Yes. Well, Paul was all tight leather and boots then, you know! A real wild child!
You: Yeah, so?
Me:
You:
Me:
You: *getting back up* THE ROOF OF THE CHURCH??!!
Me: Yes.
You: YOU UNHOLY CHILDREN! THATS LIKE SACRILEGE!
Me: If that's sacrilege, I want to be sacrilegious with Paul for the rest of my life.
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THE ROOF OF THE CH...WHOAAA!!!
You: Well, I bet you did some things with George back in the Hamburg days.
Me: Nope. We were abstinent ONE WHOLE YEAR.
You: THAT WAS IN 1960! 1960! THAT'S WHEN GEORGE WAS 17! YOU SAID AT 17 YOU AND GEORGE DID FIENDISH THINGIES!
Me:
You: Oh yeah. So, entrhall me with the details.
Me: GLADLY. Alright, well it was Hamburg, and I was scared out of my WITS.
You: OH YEAH. I REMEMBER. Ever since that drunk guy came up to you and asked you where the tacos were.
Me: HEY! THAT GAVE ME NIGHTMARES!! AND HE SAID IT IN GERMAN TOO!
You:
Me:
You: Yeah. You were with George every second of the day. EVERY SECOND.
Me:
You:
Me:
You:
Me: And, Pete's cot was conviently around...
You: YOU DIDN'T!!
Me:
You: DID PETE FIND OUT?!
Me: Well, he was a little confuzzled about the stuff he found, but otherwise, NOT REALLY. xD
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LOL! I SO PITY PETEY RIGHT NOW!!
Me: I can't believe you two. You NEVER told Pete? Ever?
You: *shake head*
Me: Well, I guess it was better that way. So who do you think wins the prize for most epically epic romance?
You: WELL, I THINK WE BOTH KNOW WHO THAT GOES TO.
Me: YEAH, ME TOO.
Both of Us:
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THE PRIZE?! OH THAT'S EASSYY!!
Me: YOU!
You: Me?
Me: YOU'RE THE ONE WHO HAS DONE IT ON A TELEVISION SET!
You: YOU'RE THE ONE WHO DID IT ON PETE BEST'S COT!!
Me: IT WAS OUR FIRST TIME, AND IT WAS SPECIAL.
You:
Me: Yes. YES IT WAS.
You: THATS ADORABLE!!!
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DAWW!!! THE FIRST TIME! ON YOUR BANDMATES BED! THAT'S SO--
Me: Wow, thats, really weird.
You: WELL, THE PRIZE GOES TO YOU.
Me: BUT YOU DID IT IN THE WHITE HOUSE!!
You: SO??! YOU DID IT ON TOP OF A FREAKIN CHURCH!
Us:
Me: I KNOW! LETS LET THE BOYS SETTLE THIS. GEORGEEE!!! PAULLL!!! GET IN HERE!!!!
You: This ain't gonna be good.
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OH YES. PAUL AND GEORGE. THIS IS GONNA BE GOOD!!
George: *walks in* Huh?
Me: 
George: WHAT OF THAT DO YOU MEAN?!
You: YOU ALL! PETE BEST! COT! HAMBURG! FIENDISH!
George: You told?
Me: I COULDN'T KEEP IT IN!! I WAS SO PROUD!!
George:
Paul: *walks in* What's with all the yelling?
You: *walks over* HEY PAULIE. WHO IS BADDER?!
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OH, YES YES YES!!! ANTICIPATION...
Paul: Oh, you, definitely.
Me: You don't even know what I'm talking about yet.
Paul: Oh, we're not talking about who's the worst at se-
Me: WHAT??!!
Paul: SELLING STUFF! i was about to say selling stuff.
Me: You think I'm bad at selling stuff?
Paul: Uhhh...
You: FORGET IT! WE NEED YOU TO ANSWER A QUESTION!
Me: In case there was a prize for the most epicly epic romance, who would win: me and you, or George and Kayla? remember, they did it in the white house.
Paul: Yeah, but thats got nothing on our church.
George: ARE YOU SUGGESTING YOU AND BETHANY WOULD WIN THE PRIZE??!
Paul: No, I'm not suggesting that!
George:
Paul: I'M DECLARING THAT!!!
George: OH, YOU'RE GONNA GET IT, MCCARTNEY!
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HAHA SELLING STUFF!! haha xD!!
Me: Ooohh... last names...
You: I knew it would come to this...
George: WELL KAYLA ALWAYS TELLS ME SHE LOVES ME! SO HA!
Paul: AND YOU THINK THAT BETHANY DOESN'T?!
George: I KNOW SHE DOESN'T! SHE PROBABLY PUNCHES YOU!
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OOHH, GEORGE, YOU'VE GONE TOO FAR!!
Me:
Paul: NO! HE DIDN'T MEAN THAT! RIGHT, GEORGE!
George: OF COURSE I MEANT IT! GIRLS WHO REALLY LOVE THEIR HUSBANDS DON'T ATTACK THEM!
Me:
Everybody except George:
You: I knew bringing you over here wasn't a good idea.
George: IT WAS A GREAT IDEA! I GOT TO RUB IT IN PAUL'S FACE HOW MUCH YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN BETHANY LOVES HIM!
Paul: WHY I OUGHTA!! *tackles George*
George:
You: Now how good of an idea was it, George?
George: *muffled* NOT...THAT....GREAT OF ONE!!!
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