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swan-swan — Mai x Zuko--'Breakup' WIP

Published: 2007-09-08 23:37:40 +0000 UTC; Views: 16310; Favourites: 88; Downloads: 2042
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Description No, this isn't the 2-year project. I was working on that, but then I switched to this for a few hours....

No subtle reference intended in the first panel....hehehe....

It's not just color that makes this a Work-In-Progress piece; it's also the fact that I'm open to advice on how to fix this piece up in pacing. It starts out very much "in media res"....I still haven' worked out if she moved to touch his scar or kiss him or even just came too close. Supposed to take place at some point in the third season, before Zuko leaves; I haven't really nailed a specific reason for why this is happening. Best odds would probably be that Zuko caught Mai talking about him with Azula and suspected/realized (as many fans theorize) that she was just being a way to keep his loyalties to the Fire Nation--it's all a deception. And, whether or not it turns out to be that way, Zuko's suspicion and betrayal is enough (here, anyway).

Whatever the situation, though, I believe that we'll probably be faced with a scene like this in the third season. It'll be the final turning point for Mai and Zuko's relationship--I left it ambiguous as to what happens next. I leaned a little more towards Maizu, though....

I definitely overused the echo effect in this--three different instances where you can see a throwback to some point earlier in the series. And poor Mai doesn't realize that "I need you, Zuko" isn't exactly going to help her cause....

Zuko's outburst is one that I seriously hope shows up in the canon--a display of anger and mistrust revolving around how she stayed behind when he was banished. Might not be a very fair demand, but....

I probably should have inked in Mai and Zuko's hair, but....oh, well.

SO....

Suggestions for improvement and adjustment would be very welcome before I go finalizing this.

I used heavy reference for the first panel (obviously) and the fifth. Most of the rest is freehand and/or minimal reference. Thanks to for some help with the Zuko designs, with her wardrobe pics.

The final panel will probably get a redo, but that's pretty much the effect I want....

And no, this was not made just because I'm more tolerant of Zutara now, I've had this planned for a while....and yes, Mai is floating in the second panel.

Characters are copyright of Mike and Bryan and Viacom.
Comic's mine.

Update: I'll probably be adding some prelude panels (two, probably), put in some sort of bridge after the first panel....and a pause or something.

Any suggestions for a dialogue bridge might be welcome.
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Comments: 134

mko1115 [2012-05-28 04:03:49 +0000 UTC]

I like this!!!! ZUTARA FTW!!!!!!!!!!!

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swan-swan In reply to mko1115 [2012-06-01 00:40:43 +0000 UTC]

*snickers*

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Yob3 [2011-06-06 16:41:46 +0000 UTC]

Thats what you get Mai!

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Choc-Marshmellow [2010-09-14 09:14:04 +0000 UTC]

swan-swan! *gasp* What is this??? I didn't know you made this one... *looks at scary amount of Zutara fanwork in Choc-Marshmellow's favs* Okay... I can't talk. Never mind. *looks at date of uploading* That makes more sense now.

It was a nice little effect with Mai getting smaller and all that, though.

I thought that Zuko buggered off without seeing Mai (due to his understandable angsting). When she got her infamous letter it would have been a "the sod left me behind AGAIN" moment.

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rockotheklepto [2010-09-05 02:13:10 +0000 UTC]

it may be sad, but it leaves a huge gap for Zutara

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swan-swan In reply to rockotheklepto [2010-09-05 06:46:17 +0000 UTC]

Sheesh, old junk. How out-of-character this piece was...

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uav [2010-06-24 20:25:19 +0000 UTC]

I like the logic in this :3

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ChaosBladewing [2010-03-08 23:47:43 +0000 UTC]

Eh, I dont mind being the first in a year to comment!

Not badly drawn, but so sad. then again, looking at the post date this might or might not have been before the series ended.

I do love your quote though on the bottom of your comments

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ChaosBladewing In reply to ChaosBladewing [2010-12-14 03:55:04 +0000 UTC]

Wow has a lot happened since I last looked at this.
Your right, it is out of character and unfair -_-

And I still like your quote at the bottom of your comments

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Kaos111 [2009-06-10 22:42:49 +0000 UTC]

aww poor Mai!

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death-to-me256 [2009-05-31 02:26:46 +0000 UTC]

yes muwahahaha!!! no more Maiko!

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swan-swan In reply to death-to-me256 [2009-05-31 05:46:05 +0000 UTC]

This old piece of trash? Ugh...

Maiko's awesome. Don't forget it.

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death-to-me256 In reply to swan-swan [2009-05-31 19:02:02 +0000 UTC]

at first it was awesome and of coarse it did win one of the many shipping battles but now it's blugh because now that avatar's over we make or own storys and guess what?

Zuko leaves Mai and Katara leaves Aang so they could be together... and in one of my many storys on fanfiction.net Mai won't let go f Zuko so Zuko has to kill her! MUWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA and katara has posioned aang because his obssesion was annoying!MUWHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA IM SO EVIL!!!!

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swan-swan In reply to death-to-me256 [2009-06-01 04:35:59 +0000 UTC]

[link]

Get back to me when you have something intelligent to say.

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death-to-me256 In reply to swan-swan [2009-06-01 11:01:49 +0000 UTC]

sorry schedule too busy for a peasent...

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jamnikowa [2009-04-26 19:59:20 +0000 UTC]

Good question... and awesome work!
Mai and Zuko 4 ever!

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strictlyninja [2009-01-05 00:33:11 +0000 UTC]

awwwww

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candylipdoll [2009-01-03 14:11:57 +0000 UTC]

I eel really sorry for Mai, aaawwww bless her, if i was watching that I would go right up and give her a big hug. *Hugs Mai*

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Alphonselover03 [2008-07-27 03:41:25 +0000 UTC]

thats sad..
MAIZU RULES

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Dougen [2008-05-28 14:01:02 +0000 UTC]

:thumb64430154: NOOO!!!! Damn glad it's just fan art! :thumb64430154:

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KarniMolly [2008-04-03 21:57:23 +0000 UTC]

Erm... Zuko... maybe she didn't follow you because she was sort of... twelve years old?

Besides... He left her once again in DobS, and she had no chance to come with him, but I think THIS time she'll follow him

Great idea!

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swan-swan In reply to KarniMolly [2008-04-03 22:05:38 +0000 UTC]

Yeah, that's the basic point. I'm hoping for more focus on the issue....

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Carcrafter7 [2007-11-25 21:28:09 +0000 UTC]

Very well done I am a Maiko shipper and yeah I wish they would have brought that up in the show. They could have done it in The Beach episode but oh well.

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Tsuki-O-Kage [2007-10-24 21:13:12 +0000 UTC]

*claps* Amazing. I seriosuly LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE Maizu. :+Favlove: Its the best canon shipping that there is. And I'm all for rocky relationships. Ya know they love each other, but theres a few loose strings no one really wants to sew up just yet. Sad, but true. I have a strange feeling something like this'll be happening, but it the end, Mai sahll-eth become the new Fire Lady! *w00ts* Seriously, its sad, and makes ya wanna cry. Great job!

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swan-swan In reply to Tsuki-O-Kage [2007-10-24 21:21:17 +0000 UTC]

Well, thank you! Yes, Maiko is a great ship...has rocky times....and yeah, I wonder if the issue will come up sometime...now, thouhg, it may be a little lighter and more conversational and out-of-curiosity.

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Tsuki-O-Kage In reply to swan-swan [2007-10-24 21:30:15 +0000 UTC]

It has to come up. The show is a lot about character build up. Those, er, loose strings are very strong character build ups

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swan-swan In reply to Tsuki-O-Kage [2007-10-24 22:08:44 +0000 UTC]

Indeed, they are. If they don't, well, that's what fanfic is for. But I SERIOUSLY hope that they cover the issue of Zuko's departure and the effect it had on Mai....

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Tsuki-O-Kage In reply to swan-swan [2007-10-25 01:42:11 +0000 UTC]

Before the Beach, I was under the impression Mai was so stoic because she'd been hurt when Zuko left

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swan-swan In reply to Tsuki-O-Kage [2007-10-25 02:03:25 +0000 UTC]

I think she was.

They definitely seemed to hint at that...him ranting at her for having no passion for anything, when she may have been most passionate when he left....and her offense when he asked about her "new boyfriend"....she was COLD there. I actually think Mai might realize that they're on the wrong side....

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Tsuki-O-Kage In reply to swan-swan [2007-10-25 19:12:19 +0000 UTC]

Whats cool about Sotic characters is they spend a lot more time contemplating about whats actually happening. Like in The Headband, Mai already suspects that Azula is no good. Its because, unlike Ty Lee and Zuko, she's able to look at things with niether passion nor distaste. Just logically. But when it comes to the Zuko thing, she is a bit..er....odd about it. She does let her feeliggns get in the way. A bit. Thats why she totally blew everything outta proportion with the 'boyfriend' thing. She didnt know how to handle it.

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sylvacoer [2007-10-14 14:03:51 +0000 UTC]

oooo, poor mai! if something like this does happen in the series, I will do more to zuzu than obliterate him with my skillet (he already got that sentence for bad-mouthing iroh) - seems to me he's used her as much as she used him!

As for critique, I'd say work on the hand she's laying over her heart in panel 2, it's a little too small in relation to her face.

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swan-swan In reply to sylvacoer [2007-10-14 19:50:39 +0000 UTC]

I completely redid that panel, actually....pulled another throwback to the ship scene....maybe a few too many of those, but, hey, it's art.

We'll finally get to spend some quality time with these two on Friday....so excited....Mai's been bored and hungry for well over a month now, so...!

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aangandkatara-4-evah [2007-09-22 16:28:49 +0000 UTC]

You have great hand writing!

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swan-swan In reply to aangandkatara-4-evah [2007-09-22 16:41:00 +0000 UTC]

No I don't.

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aangandkatara-4-evah In reply to swan-swan [2007-09-22 17:32:56 +0000 UTC]

SI, you do!

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maizu4ever [2007-09-22 03:09:39 +0000 UTC]

good job on the Mai drawing she is very pretty in here! and looks like her normal self and most of the time that doesn't happen

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swan-swan In reply to maizu4ever [2007-09-22 03:13:02 +0000 UTC]

Thanks.

I mgiht have to color this now....

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maizu4ever In reply to swan-swan [2007-09-22 03:35:59 +0000 UTC]

lol plz do!

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Sukka-Kataang [2007-09-21 10:12:02 +0000 UTC]

Wow....I really feel sorry for her... and *high five for distractions* They always get the best of me XD

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swan-swan In reply to Sukka-Kataang [2007-09-22 03:19:18 +0000 UTC]

Yeah...one thing about her is that she doesn't really have a backup ship.

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Sukka-Kataang In reply to swan-swan [2007-09-22 11:54:22 +0000 UTC]

Awww yeah.....poor Mai..

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stellarserenity [2007-09-15 02:34:24 +0000 UTC]

Didn't realise how badly I'd started to ship it until I saw this and something broke. Poor emo kids!

As to actual critique: I don't think you need bridging dialogue between the first and secon panel. The dialogue itself seems fine. Perhaps a silent panel viewed from above and behind Mai, so we get her perspective kind of as Zuko turns away?

Perhaps crop Zuko out of the second panel and insert a smaller panel between two and three showing his expression instead. Maybe looking surprised at the familiar turn of phrase? It'd contrast nicely with the hardening of his expression in panel three, as well as giving the impression of a pause, so that when he does speak it's like the calm before the massive explosion of angst.

Also, are you going to edit the panelling? The way they're set out now, the flow isn't as good as it could be. Especially the last three panels. I could be wrong, because I'm definitely no expert on panelling, but I think they'd be more poignant if they were set side by side.

And in regards to all of the above I invoke McIntyre's first law: Under the right circumstances, anything I say could be wrong. Except for the part about this comic being awesome. That part is true. No question.

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swan-swan In reply to stellarserenity [2007-09-15 02:39:55 +0000 UTC]

I like the whole vertical-panel thing....so I don't think that will change...it works well, especially with a scrolling screen.

Thanks for the advice! I'll definitely consider it...I've had a few ideas put forth, but these seem like the best ones. A smaller one between two and three....

I'm also surprised and delighted that you caught the whole "calm before the massive explosion of angst" thing....it means that I did it right, I guess, or else you know what I was aiming for!

Above and behind Mai, nice idea....

Thank you very much!

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Raelessa [2007-09-14 01:49:08 +0000 UTC]

This strip gave me a sad sigh. I do hope that doesn't happen... Anyways, advanced critique?

Well, panel 2- I don't see Mai as the hand-over-heart kind of person...and I can't do hands for the life of me, but I know you can draw them...so my question is, what happened there?

And panel...3? Is it?
Well, shouldn't his scar being showing? I mean, on your "did you notice?" avatar vids you talk about the scar is a metaphor for the dark side of his character...And I would imagine, had he the capability to love Mai, and I mean LOVE, during the breakup the scar would be a prominant kind of image...
And if he didn't love Mai, wouldn't wanting her to be self sacrificing when he wasn't basically asking for his ego to be stroked? I mean, its selfish and hypocritical to ask one person to give while the other takes. Therefore, his self-centeredness would be shown along with his scar....


Just my thoughts, though...
All in all, good work.

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swan-swan In reply to Raelessa [2007-09-22 03:18:30 +0000 UTC]

Laziness is what happened there. And it's supposed to be the "me" pose...."I need you." I might just redo that whole panel....

As for the scar not showing, I wanted to make sure that he was actually voicing genuine bitterness here. This is something that has been bothering him, and it's his true side....

I'll consider all of that, though, thanks for the critique and the pick-up!

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zukocats22 [2007-09-11 19:59:02 +0000 UTC]

very true
however u may want to change zuko's expression and stance with the full body because it makes him look like a child. make his mouth smaller and less slouched
in the very first panel, u may want to make his chinswoop in a bit, then come out

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swan-swan In reply to zukocats22 [2007-09-22 03:16:02 +0000 UTC]

Will keep that in mind.

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waterbendergirl-0212 [2007-09-11 14:55:22 +0000 UTC]

Poor Mai. Ouch. My heart aches.
:i'm being too dramatic. because of YOU, swanswan, for making this. lol. jk, dude:

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swan-swan In reply to waterbendergirl-0212 [2007-09-11 18:55:56 +0000 UTC]

I still find it amusing that I've gotten more emotional reactions from Zutarians than Maizus....XD

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waterbendergirl-0212 In reply to swan-swan [2007-09-12 03:21:06 +0000 UTC]

Well, first of all, I kinda like Mai.
And secondly, that proves that you made very emotional strips that can make almost EVERYONE feels.. uh.. emotional, even though they don't support this pairing. See? You're great then!

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