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Description
When ever there's food missing, a pile of vomit on my shoe or a rogue turd in the middle of the floor, my cat (Mike) is always somehow sleeping deeply. This never happens when he sleeps of course. How could it? These anomalies must be due to a possible portal from another dimension. Or an allusive mischievous gremlin, out to soil this poor cat's good name. Maybe even global warming. So, no worries Mike, even though the evidence is dangling by a hair from between your gray butt cheeks, I know it's just a quantum phenomenon and not because you can't wipe.

Description
When ever there's food missing, a pile of vomit on my shoe or a rogue turd in the middle of the floor, my cat (Mike) is always somehow sleeping deeply. This never happens when he sleeps of course. How could it? These anomalies must be due to a possible portal from another dimension. Or an allusive mischievous gremlin, out to soil this poor cat's good name. Maybe even global warming. So, no worries Mike, even though the evidence is dangling by a hair from between your gray butt cheeks, I know it's just a quantum phenomenon and not because you can't wipe.