HOME | DD

Description
     A traveler entered the Inn and plopped himself down on a barstool.  He ordered a beer and started to give the lovely barmaid an eyeful.
     "Best you watch who you stare at in here, Mister," said the bartender.
     "Oh yea, says who," snapped the traveler, never taking his eyes off the wench's healthy cleavage.
     "The name is Keep, and you best take my words to heart."  The waitress slipped into the back and the man finally looked back at the bartender.
     "Why, you going to do something about it," he said threateningly.
     "Oh no, I'm a peaceful man.  But the last man who came in here staring at the ladies didn't fare so well."
     The traveler rolled his eyes and turned on his stool to lean on the bar as the barmaid returned.  "Uh, huh.  You can see I'm really concerned."
     "Yes, I see that," Keep said, and continued to wash mugs.  Several minutes passed and the traveler watched the wench's every move.  Eventually she disappeared into the kitchens again, and he was left with no one to stare at.  He turned around and dropped his empty mug on the bar.
     "Fill 'er up, barkeep."  Keep did as ordered and took the man's coin.  After the traveler took his first sip, he cocked an eyebrow.
     "So what happened to this 'other guy?'" the traveler asked.
     "Well, sir, since you asked: He was sitting on that very stool and was staring at the magnificent breasts of a powerful sorceress.  Now even I'll admit they were fine breasts, but the sorceress didn't take to kindly to having his gaze all over her.  When she noticed him, she stood up, pointed a finger and said, 'stare on, and face that which you desire!'"  Keep lowered his finger and dropped another mug in the sink.  The traveler continued to look at him with boredom in his eyes.
     "So, then what?"
     "She left.  The man seemed petrified with fear and didn't move for several minutes.  Eventually the mood of the room returned to normal, and so did the man.  I served him another ale and he joked about the sorceress' lack of rhyming ability."  Keep looked up and saw the traveler had averted his gaze to look upon the barmaid once more, who was at the end of the bar filling her tray with drinks.  Keep continued his story undaunted.
     "The man came in here for the next three days, and every night he would stare at every woman he could, almost like he couldn't help it.  Then on the fourth night, he came in and told me he thought he had a fever.  Apparently he'd been sweating all day long.  I poured him a drink in an effort to cool the heat on his brow."
     The traveler turned away on his stool as the barmaid moved among the tables once more.  "Uh, huh.  Yeah," he mumbled.
     Keep paused to pour a drink for the thin man who had heard him telling a tale and walked over to the bar.  This man looked at the bartender with curious eyes, and Keep felt obliged to continue.
     "The night went on as normal.  I served drinks and the man stared at women.  His fever never abated though, and soon he spoke of being tired.  Just then, a lovely female cleric entered, and his eyes locked on her.  As she sat down and his eyes followed, he said he figured he could stay a bit longer."
     The traveler reached back and put down an empty mug, never taking his eyes off the barmaid, who had just now taken notice of his gaze.  She blushed and continued about her work, as the traveler flipped a copper coin over his shoulder onto the bar.  Keep filled the flagon once more, and soon it was back in the man's hand.
     "What happened to the man with the fever," asked Hibber, a local woodsmith who had entered during the tale and been engrossed by it.  The thin man nodded as well, desiring more of the story.
     "He stared at the cleric for about 15 minutes, and when I offered to refill his mug, I got no response from him.  Looking into his face, he seemed mesmerized, and I realized he wasn't even staring at the cleric at all.  His eyes seemed to be glazed over.  I called for my doorman to take him home, and as he walked over, he gave a shout."
     "Dammit," uttered the traveler.  "Stupid kitchen."
     Keep noticed the barmaid was nowhere to be seen, and the traveler hung his head low, still facing away from the bar.  Keep shook his head.
     "Well," asked the thin man.  Keep noticed another pair of ears on the other side of the traveler, and continued his story to the three men facing him.
     "I looked at the man, and I swear right before my eyes his hair grew from his head like wild vines.  I ran around the other side of the bar and stood next to my doorman as we both watched an amazing transformation overtake the gentleman.
     "His hair came down over his shoulders, turned honey-blonde and curled like springs.  His face reshaped into an oval, with large eyes and a petite nose.  His lips grew full and his eyes turned from the darkest brown to the brightest blue.  It was then that I realized what that sorceress had done after all."
     "Ah, fresh meat," said the traveler, drawing the eyes of all four men around him.  They followed his gaze to the door where a lovely Amazon had just entered.  All four sighed and Keep resumed his tale.
     "You see, the sorceress had chosen her words well.  'Stare on, and face that which you desire,' she had said, and that was what the man had done, and was going to do.  He had continued to stare at women, and for that offense he would face the rest of his life as one.
     "Even his clothes shifted around his body as he changed, and after only a few minutes, gone was the dirty man I had served, and what remained was a lovely maiden in a cotton dress and leather tunic."
     A series of exclamations came from the men, who were still digesting the story told to them.
     "What happened to her?" asked Hibber.
     "Well, as soon as the transformation was complete, her eyes filled with life once more and she stood up from the stool.  She held herself just like a proper young lady, and she looked around with curiosity.  Then all of a sudden, she looked at me and spoke.
     "'Are you the owner of this Inn?' she'd asked.  Though surprised, I replied to the affirmative and she said that she was looking for work.  My doorman and I had glanced at each other for a moment, then back at her and she smiled.  I realized she was an innocent now, her mind having been completely altered by the sorceress, and she deserved a second chance at life.
     "I sent the doorman back to his position and escorted the lady into the kitchens.  There I introduced her to my wife and took her into my employ."
     The eyes of the three men widened and they glanced quickly at the blonde barmaid.  Keep chuckled and they looked back at him.
     "No, that's not her," he said with a smile.
     "G'evening, Keep!" came a chipper voice from the entrance.  The men turned to face it and saw a lovely, honey-haired woman with the brightest blue eyes they'd ever seen.  She walked by them all and into the kitchens, announcing to the first barmaid that she'd be out in just a couple of minutes.
     "Okay, Anabelle!" the barmaid shouted.
     The three men looked back at Keep with wide eyes.
     "She really is a very good barmaid, but she's found a husband and will be leaving us soon.  But no worry, seems her replacement has just arrived."
     The three men looked to the door and saw no one but the dozing doorman.  Then a blast of air hit their faces and they turned away momentarily.  When they looked up again, they saw the last stages of a glowing transformation.
     Chainmail melted into a cotton shirt that rested on slender shoulders as a skull cap evaporated, leaving a gold ribbon tied around thick red hair.  A long dress appeared in a puff of sparks, and a leather corset appeared and tightened against a narrow waist.
     All three listeners stared with mouths agape as they realized this lovely woman before them had once been the rude traveler between them.  The thin one passed a hand over her face and got no reaction from her.
     "Forgot about the burst of wind," Keep mumbled.
     "What … How?" asked the third listener, a dark-haired man with broad shoulders.
     "I warned the gentleman," Keep said.  Six eyes looked at him curiously.
     "It seems when the sorceress cast her spell, she also cursed the barstool the man had been sitting on."  He motioned to the stool the woman was on.  "That stool."
     The three men all backed away slightly, as if the curse extended beyond the seat.  Looking as close as they dared, the red-haired woman was sitting on a plain wooden stool.
     "Now any man who sits in it and stares to long at any woman, will become a woman himself.  That's how I got Natasha."  Keep nodded to the a dark-haired barmaid, who was joking cheerfully with a group of Rangers.
     The men all sat down and scratched their head or rubbed their chin or took a sip of ale.  Several long seconds passed before anyone spoke.
     "So what happ …" started the thin one.
     "Excuse me," a lovely alto voice cut in.  "Are you the owner of this Inn?"  It was the former traveler, now facing Keep and leaning against the bar.
     "Yes, I am," Keep replied with a smile.
     "Well, my name is Tysha, and I've just come to town looking for work …"  She trailed off, a little unsure.  Keep continued to grin.
     "Very well, Tysha.  Welcome to my establishment.  Natasha!" he called, summoning the brunette waitress.
     "Natasha, would you take Tysha in the back and introduce her to Pell and Anabelle.  She needs to be fed and given a bed right away."
     Natasha smiled and took Tysha's hand, leading her to the kitchens.  Keep smiled as the girls went off together.
     "I tell you, Keep," stated Hibber.  "Never a dull moment in this place!"
     "I wouldn't have it any other way, my friend.  Another drink?"
     Hibber looked into the mug he hadn't realized was empty and chuckled.  Setting it down and taking up the new, full mug, he drank deep.
     "What else happens in this place?" asked the dark-haired man.
     "Well, let me tell you the story of that stool you're sitting on," Keep said with a glance.  The man jumped to his feet and stepped away from the seat.  Hibber and Keep laughed heartily, and the bartender apologized, saying that stool was fine.
     A little unsure, the dark-haired man took his mug and sat in the stool on the other side to Hibber.  Keep poured the thin man another drink as well and started into another of his many tales.

Description
     A traveler entered the Inn and plopped himself down on a barstool.  He ordered a beer and started to give the lovely barmaid an eyeful.
     "Best you watch who you stare at in here, Mister," said the bartender.
     "Oh yea, says who," snapped the traveler, never taking his eyes off the wench's healthy cleavage.
     "The name is Keep, and you best take my words to heart."  The waitress slipped into the back and the man finally looked back at the bartender.
     "Why, you going to do something about it," he said threateningly.
     "Oh no, I'm a peaceful man.  But the last man who came in here staring at the ladies didn't fare so well."
     The traveler rolled his eyes and turned on his stool to lean on the bar as the barmaid returned.  "Uh, huh.  You can see I'm really concerned."
     "Yes, I see that," Keep said, and continued to wash mugs.  Several minutes passed and the traveler watched the wench's every move.  Eventually she disappeared into the kitchens again, and he was left with no one to stare at.  He turned around and dropped his empty mug on the bar.
     "Fill 'er up, barkeep."  Keep did as ordered and took the man's coin.  After the traveler took his first sip, he cocked an eyebrow.
     "So what happened to this 'other guy?'" the traveler asked.
     "Well, sir, since you asked: He was sitting on that very stool and was staring at the magnificent breasts of a powerful sorceress.  Now even I'll admit they were fine breasts, but the sorceress didn't take to kindly to having his gaze all over her.  When she noticed him, she stood up, pointed a finger and said, 'stare on, and face that which you desire!'"  Keep lowered his finger and dropped another mug in the sink.  The traveler continued to look at him with boredom in his eyes.
     "So, then what?"
     "She left.  The man seemed petrified with fear and didn't move for several minutes.  Eventually the mood of the room returned to normal, and so did the man.  I served him another ale and he joked about the sorceress' lack of rhyming ability."  Keep looked up and saw the traveler had averted his gaze to look upon the barmaid once more, who was at the end of the bar filling her tray with drinks.  Keep continued his story undaunted.
     "The man came in here for the next three days, and every night he would stare at every woman he could, almost like he couldn't help it.  Then on the fourth night, he came in and told me he thought he had a fever.  Apparently he'd been sweating all day long.  I poured him a drink in an effort to cool the heat on his brow."
     The traveler turned away on his stool as the barmaid moved among the tables once more.  "Uh, huh.  Yeah," he mumbled.
     Keep paused to pour a drink for the thin man who had heard him telling a tale and walked over to the bar.  This man looked at the bartender with curious eyes, and Keep felt obliged to continue.
     "The night went on as normal.  I served drinks and the man stared at women.  His fever never abated though, and soon he spoke of being tired.  Just then, a lovely female cleric entered, and his eyes locked on her.  As she sat down and his eyes followed, he said he figured he could stay a bit longer."
     The traveler reached back and put down an empty mug, never taking his eyes off the barmaid, who had just now taken notice of his gaze.  She blushed and continued about her work, as the traveler flipped a copper coin over his shoulder onto the bar.  Keep filled the flagon once more, and soon it was back in the man's hand.
     "What happened to the man with the fever," asked Hibber, a local woodsmith who had entered during the tale and been engrossed by it.  The thin man nodded as well, desiring more of the story.
     "He stared at the cleric for about 15 minutes, and when I offered to refill his mug, I got no response from him.  Looking into his face, he seemed mesmerized, and I realized he wasn't even staring at the cleric at all.  His eyes seemed to be glazed over.  I called for my doorman to take him home, and as he walked over, he gave a shout."
     "Dammit," uttered the traveler.  "Stupid kitchen."
     Keep noticed the barmaid was nowhere to be seen, and the traveler hung his head low, still facing away from the bar.  Keep shook his head.
     "Well," asked the thin man.  Keep noticed another pair of ears on the other side of the traveler, and continued his story to the three men facing him.
     "I looked at the man, and I swear right before my eyes his hair grew from his head like wild vines.  I ran around the other side of the bar and stood next to my doorman as we both watched an amazing transformation overtake the gentleman.
     "His hair came down over his shoulders, turned honey-blonde and curled like springs.  His face reshaped into an oval, with large eyes and a petite nose.  His lips grew full and his eyes turned from the darkest brown to the brightest blue.  It was then that I realized what that sorceress had done after all."
     "Ah, fresh meat," said the traveler, drawing the eyes of all four men around him.  They followed his gaze to the door where a lovely Amazon had just entered.  All four sighed and Keep resumed his tale.
     "You see, the sorceress had chosen her words well.  'Stare on, and face that which you desire,' she had said, and that was what the man had done, and was going to do.  He had continued to stare at women, and for that offense he would face the rest of his life as one.
     "Even his clothes shifted around his body as he changed, and after only a few minutes, gone was the dirty man I had served, and what remained was a lovely maiden in a cotton dress and leather tunic."
     A series of exclamations came from the men, who were still digesting the story told to them.
     "What happened to her?" asked Hibber.
     "Well, as soon as the transformation was complete, her eyes filled with life once more and she stood up from the stool.  She held herself just like a proper young lady, and she looked around with curiosity.  Then all of a sudden, she looked at me and spoke.
     "'Are you the owner of this Inn?' she'd asked.  Though surprised, I replied to the affirmative and she said that she was looking for work.  My doorman and I had glanced at each other for a moment, then back at her and she smiled.  I realized she was an innocent now, her mind having been completely altered by the sorceress, and she deserved a second chance at life.
     "I sent the doorman back to his position and escorted the lady into the kitchens.  There I introduced her to my wife and took her into my employ."
     The eyes of the three men widened and they glanced quickly at the blonde barmaid.  Keep chuckled and they looked back at him.
     "No, that's not her," he said with a smile.
     "G'evening, Keep!" came a chipper voice from the entrance.  The men turned to face it and saw a lovely, honey-haired woman with the brightest blue eyes they'd ever seen.  She walked by them all and into the kitchens, announcing to the first barmaid that she'd be out in just a couple of minutes.
     "Okay, Anabelle!" the barmaid shouted.
     The three men looked back at Keep with wide eyes.
     "She really is a very good barmaid, but she's found a husband and will be leaving us soon.  But no worry, seems her replacement has just arrived."
     The three men looked to the door and saw no one but the dozing doorman.  Then a blast of air hit their faces and they turned away momentarily.  When they looked up again, they saw the last stages of a glowing transformation.
     Chainmail melted into a cotton shirt that rested on slender shoulders as a skull cap evaporated, leaving a gold ribbon tied around thick red hair.  A long dress appeared in a puff of sparks, and a leather corset appeared and tightened against a narrow waist.
     All three listeners stared with mouths agape as they realized this lovely woman before them had once been the rude traveler between them.  The thin one passed a hand over her face and got no reaction from her.
     "Forgot about the burst of wind," Keep mumbled.
     "What … How?" asked the third listener, a dark-haired man with broad shoulders.
     "I warned the gentleman," Keep said.  Six eyes looked at him curiously.
     "It seems when the sorceress cast her spell, she also cursed the barstool the man had been sitting on."  He motioned to the stool the woman was on.  "That stool."
     The three men all backed away slightly, as if the curse extended beyond the seat.  Looking as close as they dared, the red-haired woman was sitting on a plain wooden stool.
     "Now any man who sits in it and stares to long at any woman, will become a woman himself.  That's how I got Natasha."  Keep nodded to the a dark-haired barmaid, who was joking cheerfully with a group of Rangers.
     The men all sat down and scratched their head or rubbed their chin or took a sip of ale.  Several long seconds passed before anyone spoke.
     "So what happ …" started the thin one.
     "Excuse me," a lovely alto voice cut in.  "Are you the owner of this Inn?"  It was the former traveler, now facing Keep and leaning against the bar.
     "Yes, I am," Keep replied with a smile.
     "Well, my name is Tysha, and I've just come to town looking for work …"  She trailed off, a little unsure.  Keep continued to grin.
     "Very well, Tysha.  Welcome to my establishment.  Natasha!" he called, summoning the brunette waitress.
     "Natasha, would you take Tysha in the back and introduce her to Pell and Anabelle.  She needs to be fed and given a bed right away."
     Natasha smiled and took Tysha's hand, leading her to the kitchens.  Keep smiled as the girls went off together.
     "I tell you, Keep," stated Hibber.  "Never a dull moment in this place!"
     "I wouldn't have it any other way, my friend.  Another drink?"
     Hibber looked into the mug he hadn't realized was empty and chuckled.  Setting it down and taking up the new, full mug, he drank deep.
     "What else happens in this place?" asked the dark-haired man.
     "Well, let me tell you the story of that stool you're sitting on," Keep said with a glance.  The man jumped to his feet and stepped away from the seat.  Hibber and Keep laughed heartily, and the bartender apologized, saying that stool was fine.
     A little unsure, the dark-haired man took his mug and sat in the stool on the other side to Hibber.  Keep poured the thin man another drink as well and started into another of his many tales.