HOME | DD

WafflesToo In reply to nomyai [2011-09-26 15:19:55 +0000 UTC]

He's not really thinking all that far ahead right now; he's on pure reaction-mode.

Cpt. Hriss always liked Mark(despite his feelings back toward him) and found him equally infuriating to the point he once said in a report, "He'll never make a decent career officer; he's too in love with the trenches."

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

nomyai In reply to WafflesToo [2011-09-26 16:06:23 +0000 UTC]

"React, I can get the shakes later." I've seen that happen before.

That's an interesting comment made by the good Captain (even with Mark keeping him at arms length). Sounds like my own Captain Sanchez was. Much preferred to be in the mud with the rest of us than play the front office games.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

WafflesToo In reply to nomyai [2011-09-26 16:32:10 +0000 UTC]

LOL, exactly.

Early in ch.5 Mark tells Sam that if he would've stopped to really consider what he was doing he doubts he would've gone through with it.

Anyway, a lot of Mark's recent "civil disobedience" toward Lt. Adm Yajmir stems from his infuriation at the 53rd SAR being disbanded and its assets transferred to the 92nd Space Fighter. God a lot of material got cut from the beginning of this chapter XD. Six pages worth...

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

nomyai In reply to WafflesToo [2011-09-28 23:47:05 +0000 UTC]

A very valid point and it's a very good thing Mark steps back AFTER to think about it.

I think I'd be a bit miffed too, if I had my entire unit cut up and spread to other outfits.

Hmmm, possible to put in a "flashback" later on?

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

WafflesToo In reply to nomyai [2011-09-29 01:09:26 +0000 UTC]

I might restore the missing stuff to the chapter summary. Problem was that watching the two leading males sitting around getting hammered wasn't all that visually interesting and really, most of what they talked about would be of interest only to the hardest-core of fans. So, in the interest of keeping the scene short enough not to outstay it's welcome half of it got the axe I'm afraid.

A friend of mine once told me that the worst thing a writer can do is to be too in love with his own writing. I didn't know what he was talking about at the time but I think I understand what he meant now.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

nomyai In reply to WafflesToo [2011-09-29 16:45:42 +0000 UTC]

I wouldn't be too concerned about boring your readership, it would explain a lot of why Mark is Mark.

An interesting concept from your friend, I suppose that could be a disaster in the making if not handled well. I have read a few things (the Gor series comes to mind) that were overloaded with cumbersome details that had nothing to do with the chapter, flashback or otherwise.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

WafflesToo In reply to nomyai [2011-09-29 17:15:12 +0000 UTC]

Eh, I'd rather err on the side of caution. I can always put that information into a short story, or a compendium, or work it back into the ch.summary which is a bunch of reading anyway.

I've seen WAY too many examples of books and stories gone awry that could've been saved with a good editor.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

nomyai In reply to WafflesToo [2011-09-29 17:33:43 +0000 UTC]

I'm a firm believer in erring on the side of caution, kept my happy butt out of more problems than I care to think about.

No argument at all about a good editor. There are way too many books that could have been awesome if only a few extra bucks had been spent on an editor.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

WafflesToo In reply to nomyai [2011-09-29 20:26:21 +0000 UTC]

A big part of the problem is I'm my own editor and I'm often too close to the work to see the forest for the trees... and I'm running out of people who I can have proof-read stuff without spoiling things for them (most of the ones who used too are now avid followers,what's a guy to do? )

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

nomyai In reply to WafflesToo [2011-09-29 23:12:56 +0000 UTC]

I'll proof your written work, if you want. I might not be able to proof my own, but I can do others work very well. No, it won't ruin the story because the artwork will be a surprise.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

WafflesToo In reply to nomyai [2011-09-30 15:15:44 +0000 UTC]

Oh it's easy to proof someone else's work; it's your own that's impossible to do. It seems like you'll always either be too hard or too easy on it.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

nomyai In reply to WafflesToo [2011-09-30 23:05:40 +0000 UTC]

Absolutely, we are always our own worst critiques.

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

nomyai In reply to nomyai [2011-09-26 07:14:20 +0000 UTC]

"His LIFE..."

You'd think, with all the education I've got, I'd have learned to proof read a bit better by now?

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

WafflesToo In reply to nomyai [2011-09-26 15:20:12 +0000 UTC]

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

nomyai In reply to WafflesToo [2011-09-26 16:04:23 +0000 UTC]

Yupe, I need loads of work on my proof-reading...and spelling too.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

WafflesToo In reply to nomyai [2011-09-26 16:16:36 +0000 UTC]

I'd be lost without spell-check

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

nomyai In reply to WafflesToo [2011-09-28 23:49:06 +0000 UTC]

Even with it I'm still stumbling in the dark.

👍: 0 ⏩: 0