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WordCount — Wrath of the Grammar Nazi
Published: 2007-05-28 13:33:54 +0000 UTC; Views: 11946; Favourites: 150; Downloads: 71
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Description In favor of avoiding parallel structure debates (misplaced modifiers, ahh!) and a general crusade against passive voice, WordCount is offering a list of common "pet peeves" to satisfy the punctuation junkie in all of you.

Please understand that this list is by no means exhaustive, nor is it original, but it warrants saying from time to time.  Nothing in here is meant to insult you, all rules can be broken, and there are always exceptions.  One should also note that rules about comma usage and "the dash" differ from place to place and country to country, but this list falls back on Oxford's guide to style (because we all need a place to start).



1. Apostrophes are not there to make words look pretty. They do have an actual purpose (namely to indicate contractions or possession);

2. Semicolons connect two related thoughts while simultaneously separating two complete thoughts (or objects in a list);

3. "A lot" and "all right" are not words. They are phrases. If you are using them as words ("alot" and "alright"), you are using them incorrectly.  Even so, "alright" certainly has its uses, mostly related to dialogue, dialect, and slang;

4. Sentimental writing is not the same as good writing, but both have a purpose, can be worthwhile, and should be appreciated in kind;

5. Critiques should be relevant to the writer's skill level. Tearing a text apart because you can, and being rude and insulting because you can, is not appropriate for beginning or struggling writers. Give a person a critique on a level they can both understand and work with. You can be harsh and uncompromising without being cruel, and you can be helpful without being hurtful. This has nothing to do with being "politically correct" or "coddling," but instead deals with being effective as a critic. Much like writing, criticism should be done with style;

6. Words have to be used correctly before someone can take you seriously. Commonly misspelled/misused words include: there, they're, their, its, it's, whose, who's, who, whom, two, to, too, except, accept, than, then, cannot, hear, here, principle, principal, good, well, break, brake, lay, lie, weather, whether, since, sense, your, you're, effect, and affect;

7. Hypothetical tenses (would, etc.) have a very specific purpose, and chances are you are not writing for that purpose. Keep your verb tenses believable and consistent;

8. When trying to sound smart, please use your references correctly. The abbreviation "i.e." means "in other words" and the abbreviation "e.g." means "for example;"

9. Dictionaries represent common usage, not correct grammar (that's why "ain't" is in the dictionary).  It's important to keep that in mind;

10. Irregardless is not a word;

11. Exclamation points are rarely used in formal writing (outside of direct quotations);

12. "Verbing" nouns (or "nouning" verbs) is incredibly annoying (though each has its place if used sparingly);

13. Trite phrases and redundant idioms are often an indication of apathy or laziness;

14. Just because it's in the thesaurus doesn't mean it's a good idea;

15. Incomplete sentences should only be used for dramatic effect. No exceptions;

16. A colon introduces a list, a description, or an incomplete thought related to the complete thought before or after it;

17. Commas are important and should be used correctly. Correct usage does not include using them to connect two complete thoughts (you need a conjunction or a semicolon for that), a complete thought with an incomplete thought (you need a colon or an appropriate revision for that--or sometimes a double dash/em dash), or dropping them randomly throughout sentences for fun;

18. One - is called a hyphen. Two -- are called a dash (em dash or long dash when properly formatted). This "double dash" is used to connect phrases (hyphens are used to connect words). Much like a hyphen, the dash does not have a space on either side of it (although some people have been taught that way and it is acceptable under certain circumstances);

19. Correct spelling is important (please use spell check before posting anything in public); and,

20. Organization is vital.
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Comments: 123

TheCreativeClash [2011-02-05 22:30:11 +0000 UTC]

> 3 < Thanks so much for this! My grammar needed this, truly. I was making mistakes that, in retrospect, seem so obvious.

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

x-Nekotsubasa-x [2010-03-11 07:36:01 +0000 UTC]

Goodness, while this has been extremely useful to myself, I still don't know the difference between effect and affect. I feel a bit silly.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

nivlliv123 In reply to x-Nekotsubasa-x [2010-10-17 19:06:03 +0000 UTC]

You can have an effect on someone, and you can affect someone. Do you see the difference?

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x-Nekotsubasa-x In reply to nivlliv123 [2010-10-17 19:47:23 +0000 UTC]

Oh.
Now I get it. ovo

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nivlliv123 In reply to x-Nekotsubasa-x [2010-10-18 13:02:15 +0000 UTC]

8)

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MetalMagpie [2009-12-22 23:52:45 +0000 UTC]

Number 14 is brilliant.

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ZlayaHozyayka [2009-07-17 08:47:04 +0000 UTC]

What about the use of 'can' and 'may'?
I love you; you're the best.

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

Panda-lilies [2009-02-20 01:41:07 +0000 UTC]

I want to scream every time I see "would of" or "should of" in a piece of writing.

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CGholy [2008-12-29 17:57:26 +0000 UTC]

Grammar nazis are fun. My grammar is not up to scratch and some things will need more work on, I think this has helped out a lot. Most grammar guides I see are a bit too complicated but this one was really crystal clear.

Thank you

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Ikny [2008-12-10 12:46:30 +0000 UTC]

What about eclipses (... 👍: 0 ⏩: 0

disforiah [2008-10-28 01:20:05 +0000 UTC]

Language represents thought; thought reflects sensual input; this input comes from reality. Meaningful language thus reflects formally correct
realization. This works in both directions - the mechanism of thought is the same by which reality operates. Languages have their special rules and conceptions - e.g. grammar, syntax, interpunction beside more advanced ones like etymology, rhyme, rhythm or the distinction between lyric and prose - to enable their user to give said formally correct representation of reality, or create really awesome shit that people like to read for kicks, which dearly much is the same.

To paraphrase the idealist philosopher Arthur Schopenhauer, 'reading books means to think with an other's head', effectively stating that language actually can be very abusive. Just see all that wacky, inane crap people post here at DA -- serving as example only...

Seconded.

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

CatGirlPrime [2008-10-02 00:55:35 +0000 UTC]

If only the world would read this!
I die inside when I see grammar mistakes; I'm not saying that I'm perfect, but the simple things such as commas and verb tense is just mortifying. Kids learn the differences in the 6th grade, at least.

=^..^=~

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

takusan-no-ai [2008-10-01 08:17:36 +0000 UTC]

Ah, if only I could send this to everyone that did what this said not to do.

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

mynamethatislong [2008-08-14 05:30:58 +0000 UTC]

I didn't know about the "double dash". I've been doing it wrong two ways; I use a hyphen and I put a space on either side. Live and learn, I guess.

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WordCount In reply to mynamethatislong [2008-09-17 20:36:11 +0000 UTC]

I think we all do a little living and learning.

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PrestonMeyers [2008-07-10 21:57:02 +0000 UTC]

i vote #20 be moved to...number 4!

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WalnutObezyana [2008-05-18 01:38:10 +0000 UTC]

I would like to add that spell-check does not seek out all of your errors like a heat-seeking missile. Part of it has to be on the writer's half, even if it means breaking out that old, musty, 2 ton dictionary to fix the mistake.

Oh, and LOL and are never for formal writing.

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

cattieloves [2008-04-11 10:24:17 +0000 UTC]

This one is my favorite:

"14. Just because it's in the thesaurus doesn't mean it's a good idea."

Bwahaha. So true!

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

KrystalIce [2008-04-10 18:41:15 +0000 UTC]

How about 'Double negitives are a big negitive'?

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

lunaiy [2008-03-31 03:46:16 +0000 UTC]

More people need to see this


Er, isn't it also a rule not to use conjunctions after semicolons (Rule 19: "Correct spelling is important; and,) or am I just trying to be way too smart for this time of night?

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GeneratingHype In reply to lunaiy [2008-06-16 13:04:09 +0000 UTC]

The rule is to use a comma after the conjunction after the semicolon.

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tmpst24myst [2008-03-17 02:59:01 +0000 UTC]

May I print this, please? My grammar is horrible.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

WordCount In reply to tmpst24myst [2008-03-26 01:27:28 +0000 UTC]

Feel free!

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ConcreteSins [2008-02-26 18:34:35 +0000 UTC]

Sweet! I've been looking for something like this!

Unfortunately, me and words don't do goodly.

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

Tyme-Keyper [2008-02-16 14:08:20 +0000 UTC]

Excuse me, I don't know if it's already been mentioned but "i.e." is actually "id est", which is latin for "that is". It basically means the same as "in other words" but I'm sure to some there's a difference.

This little guide was delightful and I wish that the people who desperately need help with their writing would read this.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

WordCount In reply to Tyme-Keyper [2008-02-18 17:34:50 +0000 UTC]

It's been discussed. They actually do mean comparable things in regards to grammar. Saying "that is" is another way to say "in other words", but "that is" tends to confuse people into believing someone will be giving an example, which would then be e.g. (exempli gratia). To eliminate this confusion, most grammar guides will resort to "in other words" for clarity's sake.

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WineWriter [2008-02-03 02:12:17 +0000 UTC]

Hello I've featured this here: [link]

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Hazel23 [2008-01-19 02:13:18 +0000 UTC]

Lovely... I wish everyone in the English speaking world would read and apply this to writing.

Dialouge is often in incomplete sentances, becuase that's how most people speak.

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lateralsnowflake [2008-01-17 20:41:45 +0000 UTC]

14. Just because it's in the thesaurus doesn't mean it's a good idea;

It's about time someone said it!

Also, capital and capitol. God, those two drive me insane...

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littlemissmoody [2008-01-13 01:47:56 +0000 UTC]

Nicely put!

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Streetwise [2008-01-09 03:24:04 +0000 UTC]

I want to thank you for writing your articles--I was already quite familiar with everything, but I very much appreciated the refresher and now I'll have to keep a rule or two in mind from your dialogue article. Hopefully people who need these will find these.

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marwa-ness [2008-01-08 15:51:55 +0000 UTC]

I knew "ain't" isn't a word, but I had no idea it was in the dictionary. I like these articles.

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J-Jammer [2007-12-30 20:04:26 +0000 UTC]

Nicely organized.

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Squarix [2007-12-30 15:57:21 +0000 UTC]

Excellent guide

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illuminara [2007-11-26 20:33:40 +0000 UTC]

Good article! More people need to learn this kind of thing. However, I did find a typo or something in your second paragraph.

"Nothing in here is meant to insult you, all rules can be broken, and there are always exceptions."

I think you meant to have a period or semicolon after that first phrase.

I liked what you said about critiquing. That ought to be taken to heart.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

WordCount In reply to illuminara [2007-11-27 10:32:54 +0000 UTC]

Nope, it's a list and, as such, the comma is perfectly acceptable. One could also use a semicolon or a full stop if they wanted to; all three methods would be considered correct.

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illuminara In reply to WordCount [2007-11-27 16:41:24 +0000 UTC]

Well it didn't appear to me as a list at first. Just complete phrases punctuated wrong.

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Jassenah [2007-11-16 10:02:51 +0000 UTC]

This is so true.

Irregardless? Do people really use it?

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WordCount In reply to Jassenah [2007-11-18 11:07:30 +0000 UTC]

Sadly, yes.

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poprocksandcharlotte [2007-09-27 13:53:11 +0000 UTC]

I'd also note that different countries and regions have differing grammatical traditions at some point

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WordCount In reply to poprocksandcharlotte [2007-11-18 11:06:36 +0000 UTC]

This is true, though as been discussed ad infinitum where this was previously posted, all of the rules above are either part of the Oxford Style Guide (rules about the em dash, etc.) or are common knowlege and universal throughout all grammar guides (pretty much everything else), in which case these rules are acceptable regardless of which country you are writing in, provided you are writing in English. If a person learned something in a different way that's all fine and good, and no one should fault that person for it, but we're pretty confident about the wide-reach of the above rules.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

poprocksandcharlotte In reply to WordCount [2007-11-18 20:15:45 +0000 UTC]

Whatever you say

I just know the next time some genius tries to correct me on my spelling of organisation, or colour or a variable of others words that the spelling somehow differs (or any word with an s replacing z) I might have to pop my clogs and re-route that over-bearing and over zealous bout of ignorance to a credible page on the internet. I think maybe I'll book-mark it, might save time Oh and I'll do the same to the APS so there will be absolutely no confusion, although people always want to create confusion...I'm babbling

Many happy returns chaps.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

WordCount In reply to poprocksandcharlotte [2007-11-19 10:21:05 +0000 UTC]

Spelling, we're sorry to say, is different from grammar. However, considering two of our administrators suffer your same fate, we understand where you are coming from.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

poprocksandcharlotte In reply to WordCount [2007-11-19 13:19:48 +0000 UTC]

Well I was considering wrath as a common term. I identify with the wrath, so since you can understand where I'm coming from my identification would be implicit.

But since we are talking about grammar is a tangible difference I could point out but only with more research on my part first.

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ImmortalEcstasyDream [2007-09-23 22:35:36 +0000 UTC]

Amen!

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WordCount In reply to ImmortalEcstasyDream [2007-11-18 11:06:59 +0000 UTC]

Hallelujah!

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SilSolo [2007-08-31 05:01:23 +0000 UTC]

this is a grammar hotline summed up in a small list. very nice. I really find it helpful

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

WordCount In reply to SilSolo [2007-09-01 01:24:42 +0000 UTC]

Thanks! We're glad you approve!

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

SilSolo In reply to WordCount [2007-09-01 01:52:15 +0000 UTC]

you're welcome

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NekoShiney [2007-08-30 07:42:45 +0000 UTC]

This is plain awesome... I always complain about my sister calling - a "minus dash thingie sign". She's older than me, too....
Also, I'm not sure how to use whom and I'm not sure I understand the verbing nouns and nouning verb thing...
I feel stupid 8D

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