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wynryprocter — Dreams... by-nc-nd
Published: 2008-07-20 05:51:13 +0000 UTC; Views: 167; Favourites: 0; Downloads: 0
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Description Dreams

I'm crying out, I need help.
My dreams. They hurt me. They scare me. They release me.
I've had dreams of death, destruction, whether it be o self or others.
I've dreamed of being both male and female, sometimes no gender at all.
I love to dream. I hate to dream.
Dreams take me to other places. Realms that would be otherwise non-existent.
I've flown to them, rode to them, I've been guided by animals like a lynx or a raven.
I've killed in my dreams. I've... ate in my dreams things that one would never eat while conscious.
I've loved in my dreams, I've longed in my dreams. I've been hope amid sorrow.
I hate them, I hate my dreams. They scare me, I don't want to have them.
I fear sleeping, because I know they will come.
They will hit me in waves, hurting me, haunting me.
Sometimes I wake up crying. Others, I wake up smiling.
For not all dreams I have are horrid.
Some are blissful, innocent and free.
They make me smile; kissing my loves lips.
They make me joyous; holding him close, hearts beating together.
It's the black dreams though I fear.
It's those dreams that I start out falling, failing, chocking or fading.
Is it my past that make these nightmares so hideous...
I don't know... I've had a dark past.
There's still part of me that's, awkward to say the least.
Part of me that feels like its ready to pounce.
Part of me that makes me feel that I have an inner psycho.
I'm scared of it, like there's two things inside of me.
My mind is an eternal battleground; the pull and push hurt so bad.
Yet, sometimes it doesn't.
Is something wrong with me? I hope not, sometimes I wonder if other people feel this same thing I do.
We all have our angels and demons I hear. Are these mine? Well, they scare me.
I'm afraid to tell anyone, because they will say I am crazy.
I don't think I am all that much. I still like what others like.
Maybe I just spent too much time alone as a child.
I remember talking to myself when I was a little kid, like I was talking to someone with a camera.
But there was no one really there.
I wonder about these dreams, do they mean something, or are they just there?
My dreams make me think about me a lot.
They control my mood somehow
For some reason in the past 5 years, I have come to the conclusion that somehow... many people will know me.
That somehow, I'm going to make my mark on this world.
That I am part of something way bigger then myself.
People have told me that my mind has amazing power.
That they can feel me thinking, which I am always doing.
People say, that I know exactly what to say to make them feel better usually.
People also say I can read them like a book.
I don't want to be known as crazy, that makes me sad.
Sometimes people don't believe me when I say I have had deja vu.
Sometimes people shun me when I say I "saw" something.
Sometimes when I start thinking out loud, I scare people... but I don't mean to.
Somehow what I'm writing is scaring me somehow.
It's pure truth and it scares me. I read it back to me and I, myself, think I'm crazy.
I don't know, maybe its just me.
All I know is that the human mind is an amazing device.
It allows something that no other animal has, and that's imagination.
There is no real epicenter for it in the mind thus discovered.
Maybe every bit of this is just my imagination.
Maybe I'm perfectly ordinary.
Maybe it's all... just, dreams.
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Comments: 11

Peccatrix [2008-07-28 10:22:18 +0000 UTC]

Oh, and about the whole psychic thing... I've always considered myself to be as psychic as a brick, but I did once have a dream that my mum got pregnant and had a little boy- nine months later I had a brother XP That was the only time it happened though.

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wynryprocter In reply to Peccatrix [2008-07-29 00:22:29 +0000 UTC]

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Neatfellen [2008-07-22 13:27:03 +0000 UTC]

omg.... i seriously felt like u were taking my thoughts and feelings right out of my head and heart, i kno excatly wut u mean when u say that ur dreams sometimes scare u and others brightens ur whole next day, and yet i kno wut its like to be able to say just the right things to bring back happyness, and yet sadly sadness at the same time, i hate when i kno wut to say to make someone hate or sad and then i say it ne way, and pretty much ne of my friends i kno excatly how they r feeling even when they r trying to disguise it and no one else notices, and i have deja vu aaaall the time, sometimes 2-3 times a month where i go, i've been here before with these same ppl doing the exact same thing, when i kno that i haven't, its all very confusing, sometimes i will actually have a dream and then in the next day or 2 i will find myself doing excatly wut i just dremt about a few days ago, u r very right the mind is a very amazing thing, but i do think that sometimes dreams are much more than just dreams, sometimes i think that they r windows that let us see the reality of things or possibly even into the future, but u r not alone in ur feeling lol, i'll tell u that...

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wynryprocter In reply to Neatfellen [2008-07-22 19:56:22 +0000 UTC]

Nice to know these feelings aren't only mine.

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Neatfellen In reply to wynryprocter [2008-07-23 15:15:22 +0000 UTC]

lol its nice to kno that they aren't only mine also

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Peccatrix [2008-07-20 12:20:55 +0000 UTC]

All the way through reading that I was nodding to myself... so I guess that makes us two crazies together heehee! Although I love my dreams, they're awesome. I'm writing them down in a book with some pictures and stuff, maybe one day I'll put them on here. But yeah, I know what you mean so don't worry XD

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wynryprocter In reply to Peccatrix [2008-07-20 19:50:55 +0000 UTC]

Woot Woot, and thanks for the comment. I used to write mine down. Can you lucid dream?

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Peccatrix In reply to wynryprocter [2008-07-27 20:00:14 +0000 UTC]

Occasionally I have lucid bits in my dreams, like where I can choose which door to go through or something, or I'll have a moment where I think "hang on, I'm dreaming". The rest of the time I just go with the flow- it's like a movie where I don't know how it's going to end XD

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wynryprocter In reply to Peccatrix [2008-07-28 08:27:18 +0000 UTC]

I used to lucid dream after training myself too, then high school hit and I stopped because I needed a half-decent sleeping schedule. I should try again.
What I did was set an alarm for every hour, write down what I dreamed if anything then just lengthened the time after my body got used to waking every hour. Then after lengthening the time, my mind would say "hey its time to wake up" then I'd realize I was dreaming then I could take control after there was no alarm to startle me into consciousness

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Peccatrix In reply to wynryprocter [2008-07-28 10:15:19 +0000 UTC]

Oooooh, that's well clever! I have to get up at 5am for work every morning so I need all the sleep I can get heehee! My most vivid dreams tend to happen just before I wake up, which can get very frustrating when I'm just about to find the answer to some important question and then I just drift awake. Ah well, maybe that's for the best lol!

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e--motiona--l [2008-07-20 09:52:11 +0000 UTC]

I dont like my dreams either. lol

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