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alexiuss β Downfall
Published: 2007-04-02 15:26:58 +0000 UTC; Views: 971434; Favourites: 20153; Downloads: 23532
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And in this dark harvest of season
My life has completely lost reason,
For which or against to decide.
All lost in a savage and endless, bleak tide
In sadness and in kindness
In light and in darkness.
In a boat made of hope
I shall sail to tomorrow,
In a winding hurricane
Made of treachery and sorrow.
There's a spear, endless, and colossal spear...
Piercing, slashing though my head.
Starting somewhere in heaven,
Ending somewhere in hell.
Fighting, burning, crying, crashing.
Are the armies within.
In my head they are all thrashing.
On the heaven's and hell's whim.
To be light or to be darkness.
A perpetual array.
It's not merely my choice,
But the choice of the way.
It's an option of the voice,
It's a thin line of gray.
Is it a choice forced by fate,
Is it a pre-set time and date?
Or a choice to which I myself sway?
But here's our story anywayβ¦.
"Nothing that I do will matter.
As all things will merely shatter!"
All my hopes thus darkness scatter,
As it shoves me a decree.
As it simply wants to win,
And to just take over me.
"Have a purpose, bend the world,
Act out upon your wishes, and ______ will love you a lot"
That's what light then says to me,
Because it wants to set me free.
Winning slightly over me.
"But this cage of gold so shiny, it will shield you from untrue
And protect you from the odd,
Nothing inside its walls can harm you,
In your own little world!"
Whispers darkness in my ear,
"Only me you should now hear,
And with me you will survive,
And with my help you will strive,
And achieve your paradise,
In illusion's disguise!
With no hardships and no pain,
Every task you will then tame!"
The light sternly yells at me:
"These are lies as they can be!
If your world is built on lies,
Then yourself you will despise.
And illusion's paradise,
Will fall down on you.
Crashing, burning, dying, crying are your dreams
And uprooted is your tree!
And no longer will you see
Where to go or what to be!
When you face your final trial, what will the judge say to thee?"
"These are lies and mere dogma,
Based upon the fear of death!"
Darkness then just yells at me:
"You have your right to disagree!
Make a lovely pact with me.
I will offer you salvation,
No more fear or deprivation!
If you would me then just hear,
You have nothing at all to fear.
Since we do not have a soul.
There's nothing with which to pay a toll!
Sign here, over there.
In the name of pleasure and hope.
In the name of revolution,
Let your path be just a gentle slope!"
Its arguments are winning over me,
And thus with darkness I agree,
And so I sign the decree,
And with a treacherous and jolly glee
Darkness enshrouding, standing over me
"With the light here once and for all undone
You and I shall become one!"
And so, I enter into the storm of shadows.
As pitch-black as the depths of sea.
Become a mere castaway, amidst the weary crowds.
Consumed by somber, ashen clouds,
With heavens frowning over me.
A storm of ice and fire, dancing all around with a glee.
A ring chrono-storm encapsulating me.
Just like a stove turned up to high degree.
Tearing up roads, buildings, picking up debris.
Into the air it takes me.
My wings have turned to blackened ash
The pacifying, freezing fear taking over
My heart is covered in frost
And all I wished, is to be freeβ¦
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Comments: 1894
It's really beautiful and those lyrics are great as well 
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Image needs to be bigger though
Everything.. else, TOTAL WIN !!!
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Dear god, I love it, please make it bigger!
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This is so AWESOME, and I love the painting too! My mind is blown!
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my feelings for this work are not very easily expressed. it has become a piece of me. i do know that it is the most accurate description of the spiritual war i have seen in a long time. i am a truthseeker myself and extensively appreciate this work. much respect
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My Lord. It is official: Deviant Art is populated mostly by ignorant, self absorbed, teenage brats. This must be the case, as no one even remotely familiar with real poetry could have possibly read more than 2 lines of this without laughing hysterically or hanging their heads in disbelief. The popularity of this "work" astounds me.
This is the most clumsy, feeble attempt at poetry I have come accross yet. It is absolutely vapid. There is no discernible structure. There is no attempt to utilize any literary device beyond simple rhyme. The setting and tone are a complete disaster. I thought maybe this "writer" was attempting to create some kind of -and I HATE to even mention a real poetic genre in relation to this garbage- ode, or an epic poem. But then I read these words: "like a stove turned to a high degree."
IS THIS SOME KIND OF A SICK JOKE? Are people intentionally giving this "poem" popularity simply to anger those of us with any taste at all? Must be, because someone below said this is the most "beautiful piece of literature (they) ever SAW." First, you READ a literary work - you do not SEE IT. Unless they were comparing how pretty the font was or something. But I digress.
I can think of only 2 sets of circumstanes which would allow somone to derive even the slightest literary satisfaction from this filth. First, they have read nothing but the back of shampoo bottles their entire lives. In that case, I suppose this would be different. NOT ANY BETTER, but different.
The other case is simply that if you enjoyed this, you have no taste whatsoever. Not even BAD taste. You have none at all. YOU COULDN'T TELL EMERSON FROM A LIST OF JOLLY RANCHER INGREDIENTS. Of course if you enjoyed this you have no idea who Emerson is.
For the sake of convenience, I will respond to all of your angry responses to my comments now:
1) I realize I am ranting. I don't care. I am allowed to give my opinion even if it means nothing to anyone else.
2) I read this because I was curious as to what it took to be one of the most popular writers on deviant art. Obviously not much.
So there.
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First, you rant that you know everything, yet you know nothing at all.
That poetry has to have structure? Words that rhyme and flow together can mean nothing at all.
That is what separates a good writer from an amazing one. This person who I do not know has written something that has moved others. That's what amazing writer do. They move others.
Secondly, I'm almost 20. I'm not a "ignorant, self absorbed, teenage brat" as you put it. Deviant art is not just for people who are amazing artist and writers. Its for people who want to become better. Everyday someone sees something on here that inspires them whether is a great piece or not is left up to the eyes of the beholder. I'm not an amazing artist and its been a while since I've been able to sit down and draw something or write something for that matter. I'm in college and sadly my favorite hobby has indeed slipped through my fingers and it seems that lately I have been suffering from a never ending artist block. Oh and in my almost 20 years of existence I've read enough literature to fill a public library.
And yes you have a right to share you opinion, but you should be careful about it because you have most likely insulted the majority of the people on this site, including myself. You should be ashamed of your comment on calling people "ignorant, self absorbed, Teenage brats." You know nothing about these people. You don't know if the have met hardships in there lives that make them who they are. How art is and escape for some. It was for me once.
I know you will most likely not read this but I hope that if you do you understand that this is the only time I have ever been angered by someones comment enough to actually say something about it. I also hope you apologize to the person who wrote this piece because if they have written something that has inspired others i'm pretty sure they've read more then just the back of shampoo bottles and the ingredients for jolly ranchers.
You should be utterly ashamed of yourself.
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utterly ashamed? try this you half wit:
you say you and others were "moved" by this trash? I submit that you were moved the way a fly is "moved" by the smell of a piece of dog shit. Just because you are "Moved" doesn't mean that what moved you is very good. Some people are "moved" by the swastika or a kkk rally. So what?
Congratulations. You're a moron with no taste. YOU should be ashamed. fool.
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I agree with you there. So many teenagers can't even recognize true poetry. When I read this, I was like "What?". So much of it didn't even make sense to me. Honestly, I think many people were just attracted to this poem because of the picture of the angel. No disrespect against the artist though. I mean, what do I know about poetry? I mostly read poetry, not write it, so I have no right to judge other's efforts.
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I agree. This poem defrauds talented artists and their poetry of the recognition they deserve. Nothing against the artist, literature may not be his forte, but the general population of Deviant Art are pitiful in what they find to be magnificent.
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I suppose it comes with the territory. You wouldn't expect a community of lovesick teenagers to discover the next Faulkner. Now I know, and am completely grateful, that there is a significant population of DA that is more mature. However, we are all aware that serious connoisseurs of writing and art are not the reason "work" like this gets so much attention.
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Hell, I'm a teenager just like the rest of the majority. But I do understand what is professional art and what is amateur. I suppose if we want professional art we should go somewhere else to find it.
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Note: I said "lovesick teens." lol. I think this is a very specific subset of teenagers who are overly pensive and self absorbed. It doesn't have to be that way
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You couldn't be more right.
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Thank you! You would not believe the backlash I have recieved for what I said. Cursing, threats, insults, you name it. I understan the internet offers people a mask behind which they feel they can say anything... but still! People violently defend a poor attempt at poetry written by someone else! It is truly bewildering.
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You're welcome! You weren't bashing him as a person, simply stating that he didn't deserve the praise he was receiving. Most of your frustration was being directed toward the community. People are so defensive.
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Well, I do agree with the part in which you said that you've read this just to see what it takes to be the most popular writer in dA:
Actually, to get a DD or even a front page - It really doesn't take that much effort as it does take luck or followers you've had form previous 'accomplishments' here on dA. Just looking at the front page I see mostly anime, some kind of nude - 50% of them aren't even artistic, but pornographic and finally "I waz too lazy to finizh mah painting so take this awful line-art and enjoy my artsy-ness!" type of art(...if you can even call it that!). Though, to the rest of us who don't really read poetry to know what's good and what's not, this seems pretty descent.
So blame the community, not artist.
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much of my indictment was towards the community. But in a stuck up "I hate DA" type of way. I thoroughly enjoy it! I just wish people had class is all.
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Rants can be fun, but I tend to stay away from responding or making them. Yours was the one that was interesting because unlike most of rants I've read it has some truth in it.
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A good rant is a rant from the heart.
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Most magnificent literature ive ever read,absolutely georgous
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THAT WAS FREAKING BEAUUUUTTTIIIFFFUUUULLLLLL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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The most beautiful peace of literature I've ever saw.
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You READ a literature. You don't only SEE it. Unless you mean to say that you like how pretty the font is.
It is PIECE. Not PEACE.
Good grief.
And if this is the most beautiful literature you have ever read, you must have been reading the back of twinkie packages your whole life. A monkey at a type writer for 5 minutes could create a more coherent work.
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Pardon my horrible grammar, but to me you don't just read a great piece. If you get into it, you will also "see" it. I was expressing how good this poem was. Deviantart is about the expression of people, it's about art.(Depending on your definition)
If you don't like how the poem was written, then don't post a ignorant rant oppressing not only the writer but the users of Deviantart. I understand that it was your opinion,but that's not reason to put down anyone. If you want to see a professional piece go to another website. This website is only to share what you made and get feedback to make it better or to complement it.
If you know what a good piece is then give pointers to make this better.
People like you make this "fun place" more like a blank wall.
Go ahead pick this apart, but remember your only making a bigger hole for yourself.
That is my rant to you. If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all.
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Hi guys! Holding a SUPER FUN contest!!!
WIN POINTS!!
CHRISTMAS RELATED!!!
[link]
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its interesting but its your painting, no offense but i saw this picture back in ninth or tenth grade and i graduated 2 years ago. u said your painting was inspired by the picture in the link, how did you manage to redo the whole picture so well, they look exact.
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Absolutely astonishing, both the painting and the poem!! So beautiful!
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Powerful. one suggestion though instead of the blank before "will love you" i'd suggest just a generic someone
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