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CAPTAIN-CAPSLOCK-PHD β Stories that Made Me a Better Person #1
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Published: 2013-05-07 03:18:03 +0000 UTC; Views: 2202; Favourites: 38; Downloads: 5
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Check out Stuck Rubber baby and other books by Howard Cruse at his site here: [link]For more inspiration to follow your passions: [link]
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Comments: 48
This comic got me interested to read this story; sounds like it's pretty powerful and I can't wait to read it.
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It's crazy powerful. The final page is something that brings a lump in my throat just thinking about it.
I look forward to hearing your thoughts!
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I just got this response back from the library today:Β
Β Β "Instead of requesting the title on interlibrary loan, we have ordered the book,Β Stuck Rubber Baby, for the collection.Β We will let you know when it is ready."Β
This is the greatest moment of my day!! 
Β
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I think I'll re-read it. So happy you're excited to read it! If you like it, Howard Cruse reads and answers all fan emails. He answered mine, at least.
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I just got the book and I finished it. I sent you a note with my thoughts on it.
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You are AWESOME
Like *opens dictionary* look there's Roman right there, under awesome.
You are a senpai sir.
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AWWWWWW THANK YOU!!!!!!!!
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You have no idea just how much I believe in this. There are so many people around me just waiting to graduate and have a stable job, get a family and then retire and die. That's the life they expect. And when I mention to anyone that I don't want to have a 'stable' life but one that's worth it, they always ask me 'what if you end up homeless? what if you end up poor? what if you end up in a shitty ass apartment in the middle of some unknown city?' and I think 'Hey, I could work with that. Sure, it'd be hard as hell but I'd rather have that for a while before climbing up the ladder than have an 9 to 5 routine that slowly brings me closer to insanity and bitterness.
My country is so bitter, and I unfortunately want to do too many things.
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It's sad that people keep telling you "You can be anything you want to be!" when you are a child but they quickly tell you the exact opposite when you reach a certain age.Β
I'm sorry things are so bad in Spain. If it's any consolation I've learned it's pretty easy to immigrate around the EU, so maybe you can find a better home for you.Β
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Definitely. I'm a potential musician. Ain't nobody gonna get in mah way.
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GOOD FOR YOU!!!Β
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I have few chances to talk about myself so I'll take one now. i'm happy to think of myself as being on ur "side" in this situation, I can't remember if there was a specific reason for me "choosing" my mentality but I always want to be more than I am, I want to learn all the time, develop a talent etc.
Like I know I can't sing like a signed songwriter but every time I try, which is like, every other day, I think "one day I will get better". Silly example but relevant.
I've done several tests and have consistently scored a 192 IQ which still surprises me (not sure if US and UK IQ ratings are different) but I always feel the need to be ...tested so I can at least push myself to do better!
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YES! YES! YES!
Schroo! I totally agree!
All the 'adults' told me to piss on my dreams and forget them forever. But you're right, yes, they just don't have anyone who they want to be, and mostly; they don't BELIEVE they CAN ever be that way!
I found out a few years ago that your mentality really changes EVERYTHING, and that the main reason that people are unsuccessful is because they can't IMAGINE they can even be successful, or achieve their 'crazy' dreams.
I don't want to let go of my dreams, ever, and I won't rest until I have a life that I can TRULY be happy with.
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I'm glad I stuck to my dream of writing. I'm glad you stuck to YOUR dreams.
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I've had such discouragement but it's usually from people who really want to reach their dreams but had to settle for a more realistic job and just don't want to see others reach their goals while they work a 'real job' instead of dilly-dallying with say, art.
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The ones who want to convince themselves that they haven't made a horrible mistake by enforcing their misery on others, thus making their pain "normal"?
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Something like that. The ones who wanted to follow their dreams but their parents told them to be practical, so they did so, and who want to say the same thing to the younger generation, because the pain of seeing their dream fly off with someone else is unbearable.
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Sigh, just... sigh. Too much of that mentality everywhere :C
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'tis true, sister. 'tis true.
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the thing that ticks me off about that "do what you love, the money will follow" philosophy... i've been doing what i love. the money ain't never followed. : /
which is not to say it doesn't EVER work. and is not a patch on you. i mean, look at all the stuff YOU've accomplished.
anyway, i completely agree. normal people are scary. some of them don't even have any thoughts in their heads. freekin' scary.
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It's true that the "do what you love and the money will follow" philosophy is flawed. It won't always work but I personally believe that it's better to seek personal fulfillment than becoming a mindless cog for the sake of safety.
Thank you :3 Though admittedly I haven't accomplished much yet. It's just that, after so many years of depression I've chosen to dedicate my life to something I love, and now I can't imagine living any other way.
I would not expect anyone else to take the same (rather insane) risks that I took, but I will encourage them to be smart and responsible with their paths to fulfillment.
I remember reading somewhere that over half of all people do not have inner monologues. That is so foreign a concept I shudder to imagine it.
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actually, not having inner monologues is how the extrovert mind works. (that book i mentioned explains it.) so, yeah, 2/3 of the populace are not... well, i call it "thinking." a freaky bizarre concept. i still can't imagine it.
i suppose i must confess that i have been living quite comfortably below poverty level for my entire adult life. it is not fun, however, worrying about future security. : /
i think you've accomplished a lot. you left your family and that... what do you call it, your hometown society? where you lived and hated it. you've travelled all over the globe, lived in different countries. you've gotten your surgery that i understand is hideously expensive and difficult to get, to become more of the person you wanted to be.
that's a lot.
cripes, i haven't done any of that. well, i moved away from my home town. that wasn't really a big deal for me.
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One of the more recent Discworld books, Unseen Academicals, talks about the crab bucket. It changed my vocabulary forever.
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Oh fuck the crab bucket metaphor. Fucking terrifying.
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I understand this so completely. Looking around i just can't help but look around at all these people who are happy just living their lives day to day. I can't imagine not have a goal or something to look forward to like that. I'm just very lucky that my mom has always bee very supportive of what I wan to be.
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You have a great mom, then. Be happy.
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Shit, that's like looking in a mirror. I grew up in the Bay Area but my family was from the mid-West and they were just like that. The little kid with your mom telling them there's too much competition to try acting - that was me and my parents. Same words except they pushed me to be a secretary (still are, actually). I've left too because they try to suck the drive out of you and when they realize you're putting up a fight they start the "but you're not good enough to try" bit too.
Regarding what =cellyangiechowski said, too, with the "porcelain doll" thing, and your response of your parents seeing you as property, it's exactly right. It's terrifying, really, that they think this way, and think they can say and do whatever they want to keep us "pristine" in their eyes, regardless of whether it's what we want or if it's even good for us. Your comic is spot on.
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Ah yes. The "You're not good enough" speech.
I got that when I was invited to the Philadelphia School of Arts. My mom said that I was too stupid to even drive there without getting lost.
I believe that people should have to get licensed before they are allowed to have children. Too many people are ruined by terrible parents.
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Holy shit, seriously. The things some people think they can do just because they popped out a kid. Sorry to hear you got that speech too.
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I really wonder what would cause someone to talk that way to their kids. Do they really think they're helping them? Or does the concept of "This is another person, not a toy or an extension of yourself" too broad for them?
Here's the thing: I knew I wasn't stupid - a stupid person would not have a university personally inviting them. But the fact that my mother would be this discouraging broke my desire to go.
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I don't know. I think it's probably often some form of narcissism ("mother knows best") coupled with a conscious or unconscious desire to not see others succeed too much lest they feel inadequate. They only want success when they can take credit for it ("You only did so well because I was helping you.") Perhaps this is my experience with my father speaking, but it's something I've noticed.
I'm glad you know you weren't convinced your stupid. I find your comics often quite insightful. It sucks when parents drag you down like that though. I never even got the chance to apply as art schools were forbidden as a college choice and I had to stay in the same time zone.
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Interestingly, my wife (from an upper middle class white background) had the opposite: her parents dreamed of her being a diplomat or a world leader or an astronaut or something. As it is, she's a librarian. Not a bad job, but somehow, in the eyes of her parents, she's a constant failure. Unrealistic dreams are as dangerous as dream killers sometimes.
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Oh yes, this is absolutely true.
My ex was like this. He believed that if you weren't world famous, the top of your field, or an otherwise millionaire recognized genius, you were a failure.
As a result he never accomplished anything because he was so ashamed of everything he did not being perfect.
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Some parents act overly protective and obsess over their kids, pressing them to accomplish what they never could, others will go by the mentality of "I couldn't make it, you won't make it either". At least that's my opinion, I guess it goes both ways. Glad to see you're doing what YOU want.
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Thanks, buddy!
I wish there was a way to bring parents into adulthood so that the kids aren't raised by other kids.
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Reading this was very inspirations but it also hurt a little bit.
I've been lucky in my life, because my family has been very supportive of me. The school system...not so much. I was told by one teacher that I should'nt even bother with college, because I probably wouldn't do that well. Some of my other teachers said similar things. I was basically treated like an idiot for a long time.
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I don't understand why kids are so often encouraged to give up. I wonder what the world would be like if they were supported.
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It might be better, but part of what drove -and still drives me- is proving them wrong. I'm not saying kids should be discouraged, but rather that it can make them work a little harder.
Or it can give them issues in the future and a dislike for the rest of the world.
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Reminds me of my own life. My mom always said that art will get me nowhere and I need to get a real job. Really pissed me off and it bothers me that I have to call drawing a "hobby" and not something I get paid to do, which is my dream to publish my stories and market them everywhere. Part of me feels like I'm still not a good enough artist to make a difference, but I'm still doing my best to try to improve. But honestly I owe most of it to the people I meet on here. I've improved so much in such a short time just by being on dA. Sure there's drama and people are dumbshits, but there's people on here that want to help you grow. I've learned so much and I continue to learn just by being around people like you, Schroo. I know I'm much younger than you, so I'm not as... "Smart" as I have mentioned before XD, but I feel like I learn more just by being around you. YOU ARE TEACHING ME THINGS ABOUT MYSELF I NEVER KNEW.
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I'd like to direct your attention towards the following comic strip for encouragement: [link]
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Awww that was sweet. Thanks for sharing that. Made me feel a little better about myself. :3
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I'm glad, buddy!
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I've never known people like that. Maybe it's because I grew up in San Diego, CA and there, it's either be a thug or get a meaningful job. Or, y'know, kill yourself. Lots of people did that ... I think I witnessed it once, but I didn't understand it at the time. I can't remember exactly what the guy had done to himself though ... all I remember is looking down the alleyway and seeing a guy do something and drop. My mother never spoke of jobs to me, period. She never gave me the impression I even had to get any sort of job. She wanted to keep me as her porcelain doll forever. My dad just stayed up in his room all day, on the computer. They didn't share a room. My mom slept in my room invariably. She was obsessive about me. bhgf.
Enough about me. You have an inner strength and you used it well. I have no idea if I would have been able to overcome that kind of pressure. Did it ever feel like they would've disowned you? I think my relatives would've. Geez. Is your sister different than they are? I hope so ... I recall you mentioning that she also embraces the southern way of life pretty well.
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Holy shit. I'm sorry this happened to you!
I remember seeing many parents in California obsess over their children in the way you described - overprotecting them like "porcelain dolls" like you said. I saw a 6-year-old unable to speak and in a diaper in a restaurant in Los Angeles once, and many other examples of children with severely stunted development from overprotection.
They never disowned me. In their minds, I am always their property and they are waiting for me to come back to them and be their pet like I used to. It was ME who had to disown THEM.
I don't know much about my sister's parenting skills, but from the one week I spent with her and her son the behavior was strange/unhealthy indeed. They acted far more like brother and sister. Also, she would lavish herself with a huge bedroom and expensive sheets and towels while he got a military cot and a room barely big enough for it to fit in. He currently weighs about 400 lbs in fat and ended up becoming a perscription drug dealer and was caught slashing tires.
I haven't spoken to either of them in at least five years and I most likely never will again. I can't say it bothers me very much - no one in my family was a positive influence.
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Good thing I didn't understand it except for a vague sense of, "I think I just saw something wrong?"
I was a lot like that child. It's gross for me to think about now, and I can't believe I'm the same person as that underdeveloped little girl, but my mother didn't make me learn to use the bathroom properly until ... well, some time before the divorce, for sure, when I was eight. So I had a portable potty. Eurgh. She'd throw what was inside it in the bushes out front our apartment, like it was nothing at all and never listening to any of my father's protests, when he did deign to come downstairs and not be a hermit. I'm gonna stop there because eck.
Is there any possibility of anyone, at least in the younger generations, coming around in the future? I heard someone once relate a story of their life where their young cousins eventually outgrew their family as well and used the person telling the story as an example how to get away as well. It bothers me to know that if I ever tried what you have, I just know my relatives would spread horrible things about me to the others, and they'd probably go out of their way to scope me out from wherever it is I'm hiding and learn my address and phone number. They're nosy people that way. Somehow I think yours is too rural for all that. Good.
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I....I.....uh......I really don't know what to say.
I guess the best way to put my feelings towards this is that its beautiful, and inspiring
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Thank you, pal.
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don't mention it!
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