Description
*Now inked*
A massive disservice of Chinese origin was visited upon the entire world not so long ago... it stirred hurricanes of controversy, ended relationships and forever changed the world thereafter...
....
....
... and yes, I'm 100% talking about Awkwafina being given an original song to sing for her performance as "Scuttle" in Disney's 2023 reboot of The Little Mermaid.
Our favorite little drink of water (Ultra Instinct allows me to dodge your bricks due to my limitless inner... shame) finds herself coming to from the chloroform, seated surprisingly comfortably in the VA recording booth at Walt Disney Studios. However, her stuffy vans and Bombas socks have been stripped, leaving her pretty bare feet to wiggle curiously. Local pretty punkette and purveyor of perilous pedicures - the one and only Missy Demeanor - enters the booth and takes a deep sniff of Nora's spritely little Asian toes. The sweet perfume of a hectic schedule (press tours, tedious interviews, likely a came on Fallon, if anyone's still watching that...), a reliable pair of slip-on's with their owner's feet deeply impressed into the sole leather, cotton socks and whatever lingering trace of floral hotel soaps last lathered those tender piggies swells within Missy's eager nose. She's no Carmen, but she will certainly do!
The debonair delinquent glides a stiff feather against 'Fina's milky soles, tickling a familiar raspy and full-hearted chortle from her cackling captive! Before the night's end, a *sound* apology will be uploaded to the internet, in the form of a far more preferable sort of vocal performance from our damsel than that horrendous sampling of cochlear-sodomy that was "The Scuttlebutt." Scream though she may for rescue, Awkwafina will know no peace until her captor chooses; Missy didn't choose a soundproof recording booth on accident, after all...
Maybe Missy can blackmail her way into a small cameo in the next "Shang Chi"!
Please enjoy!