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Lluhnij β ACMe contest no. 1
Published: 2006-11-16 18:40:39 +0000 UTC; Views: 887; Favourites: 13; Downloads: 18
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Description
The phoenix tree<><><><>
made on a 8 x 11'' paper, but the size of the drawing is half of that; black pencil B2 and B3.
I'm reading a very interesting book by Andrew Loomis, titled "Creative illustration" and I based the composition of this pic on some ideas from that book.
Apart from this, I don't know... I started drawing lines without a specific idea in my mind, and this is the result.
Please let me know all your opinions on this sketch, and participate in the contest!
Thank you all!
ACMe ('Advanced Critique' Me) is an initiative started on DA by , a very good illustration I began devwatching a while ago. Here are the rules of the contest he invented:
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ACMe rules:
1. Be the best art-critic that you can be. My favorite critique will win the contest!
2. Please, no comment critiquing. Everyone's opinion is valid. Comment on the artwork only.
3. Multiple comments are okay as long as they remain within a single thread. (i.e. a conversation between you and me)
4. Only the first week of commenting will be considered for entry into the contest.
5. Be frank, be honest, and be bold! Even if your critique seems hurtful, I guarantee that I won't take it that way. I have thick-skin folks and besides, I REALLY want to hear what you think. Don't pull any punches now! Fight like a winner!!!
6. The winner MUST post a personal ACMe contest within the following week, or forfeit the prize entirely. No exceptions! No prize artwork will be started or shipped until the winner's ACMe contest is in full swing.
7. Please notify *ACMe-contest if you are starting an ACMe contest of your own.
Comment Suggestions:
1. Tell me the story that the artwork tells you.
2. Tell me who, what or when the artwork reminds you of.
3. Tell me what I messed up, and how it could be improved. Don't be shy; anatomy, composition, perspective, etc. C'mon take a shot!
4. Any tips or tutorials out there that might help me out?
5. SPECIFICLY what do you like or hate about it? All opinions are valid!
6. Tell me how it makes you feel...and why.
7. Tell me about yourself and how the piece relates to you.
8. Most anything goes folks, just talk about it!
The Prize:
The most (thoughtful, helpful, delightful, creative, and critical) commenter will win the actual critiqued piece.
Related content
Comments: 17
I LOVE the birdly things and the whispy sun behind them. and the rocks and the tree even. Nice pose on the little guy.
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I've never done one of these art critique contest before. So, I'll just have to say basically what i think about the picture.
Personally it reminds me a lot of a piece i did not that long ago. [link]
The things that really made me think of my art was the wispy feathers of the birds & the shape/design of the tree.
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Besides the part of my brain that is saying "hey, that looks like something you drew."
I'm only so-so on if i truly like it or not.
The thing is that to me the picture doesn't really seem to be trying to communicate a story it seems more like a moment captured .. and thats really the everything of it.
(i haven't looked through your gallery so, this could be a small piece of a bigger collection. which would rid you of that criticism.)
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Yeah, you're right I think, I didn't have any story for this pic, it just came to me as a flash, so it's very just to say that it's a moment captured.
I thank you for the comment, a positive (constructive) criticism, IMHO, should tell the facts, and not only the good or the bad things
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Things like this is why I'm so glad I found you to watch. Your style is always so fresh!! You're not just develiped in making "The Pretty boy" types and the like, but you really focus on the fantasy aspect. Like otherworldly even. I dont know how to describe it, but I do know you're amazing at what you do
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Thank you Mis.
I really hope I can be up to the espectations after your words, you're always so kind to me... ^__^
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I'm deliberately not reading anyone else's comments, so I'm not influenced by them, so apologies if I repeat stuff from other people!
Firstly, I like this. On first glance, it reminds me of a Brian Froud picture, and that's no bad thing. The faery has a nicely Froud-ian face.
The phoenixes. I'll start there. I love the top two, but I'm not so sure about the main one. I can't really see (without being told) that it's a phoenix, or bird. I can see 4 "wings", but I can't immediately see a head. Without that, I can't really see what it is, and also I can't really tell whether the faery is looking in the right direction. Saying that, I love the phoenixes's shape, they are beautifully curvy and wavy, in contrast to the tree, which is much more angular and line-based. I'd love to see them in colour!
The tree. Love the tree. Love the way the branches are growing lots of new twigs in a really realistic way. I'm not sure why leaves are being bound onto the tree in front of the faery (?)
The faery. Love the faery
Overall. It's a really nice sketch. It's got movement, a good composition, and the faery is great. Maybe it looks very slightly as if its ducking under that branch, but it's still great! Well done!
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Immediately the image struck me in a weird way, because it sort of resembles something I am currently working on. Not the same, but similar in composition and elements.
The tree is pretty neat. It looks like the faery could climb right inside and be gone from sight. Even though the tree looks cactus like, I think the scene looks cold. I wonder what those ribbons are for.
I have to say, the composition looks great! The details keep guiding my eyes from one interest to the next. Iβm going to look up that book. I donβt think that Iβve read that one, although I really dig Loomis.
The birds. Why do they linger? Someone has died. A mate of the faery! Hmm. Duh! The tree has died. The tree nymph mourns the loss of the tree, decorating it with ribbons where leaves will no longer grow. The birds donβt seek carrion. They seek a roost! Those birds are beautifully designed BTW.
As Andy said, perhaps they are phoenix birds. This may only be the temporary death of winter. The sun is going down on this scene. Another symbol of death. The faery seems rather indifferent in expression, for like the sun and the phoenix, the tree shall be reborn.
If you redo this drawing I would have one branch break the frame the way the bird wings are doing. Iβd also add more detail to the landscape in the foreground behind the faery. I caught myself wondering if that was water too, and had to look harder to observe that it was land. What throws me more than anything is the shading of the land. It is too light and it darkens in the distance. It seems almost reflective of the sky, like water. I imagine you were trying to make the faery pop against its background, but I do think a bit of shading back there would help the image overall.
If Iβm at all right in my assumptions about the tree's death, a more tender touch on the part of the faery might be in order as well.
Iβm sure Iβve reached the point of over-analyzing this long ago, but it was fun. Iβll stop now.
Great piece Elena!
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Oh well, finally I have the time to dedicate to a decent answer for your beautiful comment! :-D
I'm curious about what you'r working on, that is somehow similar to this pic
Following your points... I must say, as a premise, that I didn't think about a story when I drew this pic. It just came out of my mind as it is, plain and simple. The ribbons come from my experience: I've seen in England and in Ireland that somewhere there are trees all covered with coloured ribbons, and I've been explained that every ribbon is the symbol of a wish from the person who placed it there. I really love this tradition, it feels like an ancient magical rite of simple people.
Thank you about the birds... I don't know if I like them completely, or, better, I like them but perhaps they're a bit too much stylized, in comparison with the "realistic" details of the rest of the pic.
I think the tree is dead, but I don't know if the birds or the fairy are mourning.
I imagine this pic as sort of a scene from the desert, where the stillness of the things is the stillness of the feelings, and viceversa... (and, well, yes, to me the scene is hot 
(ehh, it may be strange, but I sincerely can critique the meaning of my own picture, and study on it, because it's just like someone else did it!)
I totally agree with you about the branch breaking the frame, and about the foreground behind the faery, now I see the issue.
Thank you for all your help, I really appreciate it! 
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First of all, let me say this is a really striking piece. I'm digging the composition and those phoenixes have a fabulously evil, skeletal look about them.
I think your horizon line looks a little artificial. The angle it sets up is not consistent with the objects in the foreground. That is, with a horizon line that high I'd expect to be able to see the tree at a bit of an angle so the back roots were showing above the front roots. Does that make sense?
You've done a great job of creating depth in the picture with the perspective on the stream winding back into the distance.
The texture on your tree is great. Really nice tones.
I'd like to see the character regarding the phoenixes rather than looking out at us. Looks less like a holiday snap and creates a nice interplay between them.
Well done.
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This is wonderful, such fantastic detail 
Blessed be
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Sorry in advance for not given an advance critique.
I do like this very much. It has lovely oriental feel to it and does remind me of some old Japanese prints. I love the birds and the mix of flowing elements and spikey branches.
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Thank you very much for your comment, I'm glad you like it, and that the composition seems to work ^^
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That's very well done. I really like the detailing and atmosphere. Nice character design and fine setting. The tree and birds are gorgeously illustrated. Very good movement and depth.
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