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Oshouki — +IRIS+ Cover1 B+W by-nc-nd

Published: 2007-11-26 08:55:14 +0000 UTC; Views: 2608; Favourites: 22; Downloads: 0
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Description First IRIS cover page, in black and white (well...except for the font, that is.)

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I've been working on this on and off for many weeks now and I originally planned on doing a full colour cover, but this turned out okay enough to submit (for now) and I wanted to show the original pencil work on Iris. It's been a real pain of picture -- this is file version #9 -- it and its predecessors all have dozens of layers, many of which are layers of trial-and-error stuff that I'm not sure how to finish but don't really want to discard yet.

Anyway, a colour cover may be coming later.....a lot later.

Edit:
I softened the hands so that they wouldn't look so manly.
I also practically redid the katana blade -- added more curve (too straight before) and did the dragon reflection properly so that the dragon's eye lines up with Iris' (which is the effect I originally intended -- Iris' eye should not have shown through the blade as it was.)

synopsis (for those who don't already know):
Because of the fallen White Dragon's eye transplanted into her left socket, Iris has an enhanced killer instinct, making her the top assassin in the dark, future world run by gangsters. But when her master and employer becomes fearful of her growing powers, he orders the extraction of the eye and her death. The operation fails. The eye is only partially removed when the separation of eye and owner triggers a bezerker rage that renders everyone around her dead. She awakens, with eye intact, surrounded by the carnage, with amnesia. Thus begins her journey to rediscover the truth, while the dragon's persona and hers slowly merges into one again.
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Comments: 59

Oshouki In reply to ??? [2007-12-19 22:59:12 +0000 UTC]

Thanks. I agree, something is off with the hand -- to be honest, I drew Iris over and over for this and this was the closest I got to satisfaction. So, I stopped to keep from pulling out all my hair. Incidentally, the hand is somewhat referenced, so I can't quite figure out why/where it is off. For you to compare the pose in reference to Katori Shintou Ryu is a very nice compliment.

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OjisanPhoto In reply to Oshouki [2007-12-22 13:46:08 +0000 UTC]

Well, all I can say is that the overall impression of the pose is great. But as for the hand I guess it is just hard to get all the elements to correspond to the way you want it.
I've gone to the extent of posing with my own sword just to try to figure out what went wrong for you here.
To me it seems like the hand pose is a result of several factors:
- High shoulders
- High elbows
- Your decision of seing the katana in profile
- Your decision to keep the katana in paralell to the vertical frame.

Well, that is what I can see.
I understand that you want to keep the blade in profile, but it does create that "strange" hand pose. The pose would work great with all swords except curved ones.

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Oshouki In reply to OjisanPhoto [2007-12-22 18:02:00 +0000 UTC]

Your assessment is absolutely correct. The difficult part with this was in incorporating all the elements that I wanted in the layout and concept, which at times are in direct opposition to proper form and anatomy. As I said, I struggled with this one a lot -- I should learn that when that happens, I need to abandon and consider doing something altogether different. In this case, I became too attached to the concept of the background dragon and the reflected eye in the sword aligning with Iris'.

In terms of actual and traditional form for holding a katana, I have too little experience. I really should do more research before I draw the parts of this story that involves sword play. The high shoulders and elbows are obviously poor form. But the idea was to express tension through body language and set a tone for what Iris is/will be experiencing. The katana in profile and vertical is probably never done, so is also bad form. But as I mentioned earlier, it was to accommodate the eye reflection. Anyways, from reading your comments, all of this you had probably already ascertained.

If you can see a way for me to achieve all those elements without compromising form too much, I would love to hear any ideas that you may have. Thank you so much for your analysis of this picture!

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OjisanPhoto In reply to Oshouki [2007-12-23 01:40:42 +0000 UTC]

I'm glad I can be of help and give some opinions, but I once again have to state that I really like the setup of the entire page.
Having the dragon in the background and the katana lining up with the eye (the Iris) really underlines the title.
But I agree, getting stuck to a consept can be irritating... but then again, you won't get anywhere unless you try.

But once again, the page looks excellent and her pose works great to show power and it works great as a pose, but when compared to a stance it is obvious that there are some flaws. Never the less... it works well.
If I had been a genious at drawing I would send you some tips.... but I suck at drawing. But by all means, yell if you need some opinions. I got some photos from kendo and kobudo sessions that you might use if you need, so feel free to ask. I won't charge or demand anything other than the copyright to the photos themselves.
Rest assured, I am looking through my collection for a stance like this...

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Oshouki In reply to OjisanPhoto [2007-12-24 02:14:47 +0000 UTC]

I appreciate the offer of help. And I will certainly give you a shout when the time comes. It would be very helpful to see stills of real action!

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samisaywhat [2007-12-08 18:02:45 +0000 UTC]

Awesomely done
The pose is great and the dragon is amazing!

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Oshouki In reply to samisaywhat [2007-12-09 06:23:45 +0000 UTC]

Thank you very muchly!!

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samisaywhat In reply to Oshouki [2007-12-09 06:38:57 +0000 UTC]

Welcome!

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Sch-G [2007-12-03 20:21:39 +0000 UTC]

I just love her face and how you drew her hands!
Drawing hands for me is a real pain ^^''

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Oshouki In reply to Sch-G [2007-12-04 08:14:33 +0000 UTC]

Thanks!! And thanks for all the comments and favs!!!
Hands are a real pain for me too!! But I'm forcing myself to draw them more and I find it's slowly becoming easier. References help too!

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Sch-G In reply to Oshouki [2007-12-07 11:28:49 +0000 UTC]

Your very welcome! I had sudden urge to talk to people, that happends often to me I'll try using references too, maybe it'll help!

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Oshouki In reply to Sch-G [2007-12-07 16:34:39 +0000 UTC]

I'm like that too. Most of the time I'm like a hermit and don't want to talk to anyone (but force myself so I don't look like an arrogant a**hole!) But sometimes, I really enjoy it and waste all my time conversing rather than drawing.

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Sch-G In reply to Oshouki [2007-12-07 17:48:21 +0000 UTC]

Sometimes I`m very lazy to reply and it takes ages for me to answer all comments ^^''
But when it comes to chatting with people I can`t stop!xD

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Ryoko-and-Yami [2007-12-01 03:44:43 +0000 UTC]

I love the dragon in the background! So detailed! WoW! I love the designs were the sword meets her body! Is that an evil eye?

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Oshouki In reply to Ryoko-and-Yami [2007-12-01 05:12:23 +0000 UTC]

Thank you. I'm glad you like it and can see the details. Yes, you might say the eye is evil....but more like vengeful and with blood-lust.

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Vinnora [2007-11-27 00:44:08 +0000 UTC]

this kicks serious ass.

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Oshouki In reply to Vinnora [2007-11-27 05:13:13 +0000 UTC]

Thanks!!

(speaking of kicking ass, you're doing some ass kickin with that new tablet, yourself!!)

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Vinnora In reply to Oshouki [2007-11-27 05:15:57 +0000 UTC]

thanks

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NGoff [2007-11-26 23:17:14 +0000 UTC]

Even though the only color is Iris and pops out, it still balances with the rest because of the high contrast with the white of her to the black BG.


Exceptional! Not cluttered with other info (barcode etc. which could be added to the back cover). Very unique placement of the signature which I find works well with this piece!

Careful with too much detail in female hands (unless they're old or signify something specific-scares etc). Great asymmetry in the piece, nicely balanced!

I like the eye showing through the blade, but I can't tell much of the detail in relation to the other one. It seems to be the same. I'd think the one in the sword might be better represented if lighter in detail/value. To signify more of the difference between the two and to keep it from appearing that the sword is just translucent (unless your intention was that). Especially since that eye is very significant to the story.

Composition and layout...perfect to me! Very nice indeed...you should be proud! I am.

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Oshouki In reply to NGoff [2007-11-27 05:11:37 +0000 UTC]

Thank you!! I knew I could count on you to give me a sound critique!!

The b/w with just the logo being red does seem to work. I tried desaturating it to a gray at first, but it just didn't look right. (I'm so very much trial&error still -- falling into what works.)

I didn't even consider things like barcode and the standard publisher box-thing in the upper left. Did Kubert's teach you keep those elements in mind when designing a cover layout, or is it "duh!!", it's common knowledge!?

I've softened the hands -- it was definitely too manly -- hopefully that's better, without obliterating too much of the features.

My intention for the eye was to have the bg dragon's eye reflection in the blade coincide with Iris'. I got lazy when the mirrored dragon image didn't seem to work given the angle of its eye compared to Iris'. The implied blade transparency was a compromise, but not the effect I wanted. Thanks for giving the kick in the ass to do it the way I should've done it in the first place. I think the effect I wanted comes across better in the edit.

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NGoff In reply to Oshouki [2007-11-27 22:36:08 +0000 UTC]

Unbelievable!! Great turnaround time...jeez...I am soooo jealous of your 'get'er done 'n get'er done right' motivation. This looks remarkably better...though I'm not saying it was bad before, but now I can actually see what a difference those changes made.


A+ for art/quality and A+ for effort!


I never considered cover art before school so YES....when I went through the school, they taught us about leaving room for such things. Of course you would consider the format of whichever 'book' you were drawing for. Usually, the publisher will have blueline-templated cover sheets to do the work on.

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Oshouki In reply to NGoff [2007-11-28 04:35:36 +0000 UTC]

Thanks. I'm pretty motivated right now. I want to make this my second career. And I'm glad the edit worked -- thanks again for the advice. The turnaround was fast because I wasn't satisfied with the first post to begin with and kinda knew what I had to do.

Actually, I'm surprised to hear that they imparted to you such practical knowledge. Most schools spew useless theoretical crap, but I guess since Kubert's is a very genre-specific school, practical is important. When I studied engineering, all they taught us was academic theoretical gobble-dee-guk -- important stuff, but very impractical in the work place. Everything I know and use is self-taught while on the job. I guess that's a poor comparison. But I hear a lot of art schools do the same -- pile on a bunch of art history and stuffy stuff.

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NGoff In reply to Oshouki [2007-11-28 22:31:58 +0000 UTC]

I'm glad to hear you knew what things you felt necessary to change before hand.


We didn't have history, math or any of those extra classes...no degree involved...just a paper of completion. But it's regarded highly in the comicbook biz. This was strictly 10 classes a week...full time...like High School hours/days (Summers off)...3 year school. All classes were related to story telling, different mediums, approaches, writing (have to know how to draw from different types of company scripts), business (behind comicbooks mostly) etc.

It's a comicbook school after all...but don't get me wrong...in comics you have to be flexible to be able to draw anything, so it's something that many artists can benifit from regardless of application of your art. You learn the fundementals of art as well...color theory, perspective, anatomy...etc.

I wish I could go again!

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Oshouki In reply to NGoff [2007-11-28 22:42:02 +0000 UTC]

It must have been fun if you want to go again! Is there a lot of competition for enrollment? How much was tuition, if you don't mind me asking?

Not in a million years do I want to go back to my school. I lovingly called that campus the center of hell for many years afterward. I still have dreams about having to write final exams after not having gone to class all year...I wake up in a cold sweat and say to myself "how did I get my degree??"

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NGoff In reply to Oshouki [2007-11-29 20:18:40 +0000 UTC]

Tuition now is about $16,000 a year...it goes up every year. I don't know about the competition....after 3 years, about 16 graduated (started off with around 40-50). It's a small school.

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Oshouki In reply to NGoff [2007-11-29 20:54:10 +0000 UTC]

Wow that is a small school. But it's pretty famous! That ranks you pretty much among the elite. My first reaction to the tuition fee was "yikes!", but I come from the era of heavily government subsidized education, so I was spoiled. Considering what post-secondary education costs these days, that is actually very reasonable.

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NGoff In reply to Oshouki [2007-12-03 14:26:46 +0000 UTC]

Well..it doens't rank me with the elite..that's for sure. You don't have to have superb talent to get in...just show you have the ambition and motivation to learn and grow in art. ONce you're in, then you have to just follow the instructions and show effort. At least that's how I assess the enrollment and graduating results.

I think one of the reasons it has such a high rep in the field is because of the demands it puts on the students....being able to work on ten different classes a week, usually with an assignment (or progress stage) due each week for each class. It gets the students ready for the work load and hitting deadlines in the 'real' world of the comic field. Decipline and professionalism....under stress.

The skill growth in the actual art is something that really depends on the student. Grading is based off of the following of directions (like you would for an editor) and showing effort.

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Oshouki In reply to NGoff [2007-12-04 08:33:05 +0000 UTC]

It definitely ranks you with the elite!! And your artwork is the proof! Don't be so modest! Like you, I believe talent is useless if effort is not put forth. Having seen your current work as well as your earlier stuff, you obviously work hard at your craft! To me, that ranks you as elite! On top of that, your willingness to share your knowledge and advice is really commendable!!

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NGoff In reply to Oshouki [2007-12-04 14:09:53 +0000 UTC]

Being modest acknowledges that there is and always will be others more talented out there.


And thank you for your kind words. I enjoy giving advice, but fear some may see it as conceit.

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Oshouki In reply to NGoff [2007-12-05 04:30:52 +0000 UTC]

Those who see advice as conceit are only dumbed by envy! If you ever feel a need to throw advice, I've got a big target painted on my forehead!

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NGoff In reply to Oshouki [2007-12-05 22:40:07 +0000 UTC]

Unfortunately I'm a bad aim, but yes...I'll try and throw it in your general direction.

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Oshouki In reply to NGoff [2007-12-05 22:54:23 +0000 UTC]

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IcEKoLd [2007-11-26 22:30:27 +0000 UTC]

Good grief Oshouki! The details on the dragon are amazing. I'm sure it was very time consuming to draw it to perfection.

I like how her eye is visible through the sword. It puts more focus on the importance of her left eye, as well as give the sword a glassy look.
The dragon's reflection on the sword also gives a nice affect. It's very beautiful.

I have have to say that this makes an outstanding cover! Great job on the excellent work, and I look forward to the colored version - even if it does take a long time.

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Oshouki In reply to IcEKoLd [2007-11-27 05:22:27 +0000 UTC]

Thanks!! I really appreciate you spending the time to comment! It's really nice to know that others think of my work.

I cheated somewhat and used an edge-detect special effect to get the scale details (you'll see what I mean by that if I ever submit a full colour version.) I did however drew and inked the dragon by hand -- twice. I'm glad you like it, but its far from perfect (being the perfectionist that I am.) The inverse effect of the dragon hides many of its short-comings.

Her eye showing through the sword was actually my laziness. I didn't intend for the blade to be "translucent". I wanted the dragon reflection's eye to line up with Iris', but failed to achieve it on my first go -- I've edited it now and its more what I had initially intended. Despite all that, I'm glad you liked it. But give the new version a look and let me know if its still good.

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IcEKoLd In reply to Oshouki [2007-11-27 15:53:08 +0000 UTC]

I know what you mean by edge-detect. It does indeed have a nice affect. Do you use Gimp?
I also took a look at your updated version and I have to say that there is no mistaking now what you intended the eye on the katana to be. It's clearly the dragon's eye and I understood that before reading your comment.
It also makes me wonder what the dragon has to do with her eye. I am just more intrigued. I also don't think the coloring will be some small feat, but so you know - it's looks great even without color.
Always pleased to review a perfectionist's work. I'd like to say I'm one, but I lack the patience.

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Oshouki In reply to IcEKoLd [2007-11-27 22:01:15 +0000 UTC]

I have used gimp, but I always go back to what I know best (photo-paint -- part of the Corel Draw suite.) It's hard for an old dog to learn new tricks.

I glad you find the story idea intriguing. And thank you for your interest (and support)!! The suspense is probably only there because the pages are being produced so slowly .

As for the perfectionist thing....I'm fairly impatient too (thus I resort to digital effects to hide imperfections.)
Perfectionist - Patience = Self-Critic

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IcEKoLd In reply to Oshouki [2007-11-28 03:59:39 +0000 UTC]

So maybe the pages being produced slowly is a blessing! You get people who crave more. Just hopefully the people who say "MORE" only won't get to you one day. It seems to happen a lot as the comics go on. Anyway, you are very welcome for the support and you better expect more from me.

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Oshouki In reply to IcEKoLd [2007-11-28 05:09:16 +0000 UTC]

I'm not all that popular and don't have many watchers (and even fewer that respond to the comic), so I'm not too worried. But I'll try very hard never to leave you guys hanging. Thanks.

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IcEKoLd In reply to Oshouki [2007-11-28 14:55:34 +0000 UTC]

Maybe only a few watchers now, but I bet it will grow quickly. People just love comics. I know I do. Not surprised that a lot don't respond. It seems to be a habit for many.

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Oshouki In reply to IcEKoLd [2007-11-28 15:55:27 +0000 UTC]

Hope so. But not too many, cause responding to messages (although fun) is really time consuming. I kinda feel sorry for the really popular dA artists that get swamped with hundreds of messages a day. It would be good if would translate into comic book sales. *day dreams*

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CrimsonNightshade [2007-11-26 21:44:21 +0000 UTC]

Oh, wow! I love it! ^_^ The way that the title jumps out at you is great! The dragon in the back is just so amazingly detailed! And Iris herself is so well done!

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Oshouki In reply to CrimsonNightshade [2007-11-27 05:23:53 +0000 UTC]

Thank you so much!!! I'm glad you like it. Originally I was gonna make the title gray or white to maintain full "black & white", but it just didn't look right.

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CrimsonNightshade In reply to Oshouki [2007-11-27 21:58:31 +0000 UTC]

Welcome!! I'm glad you went with the red title~ It looks really cool like that~

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Oshouki In reply to CrimsonNightshade [2007-11-28 04:36:16 +0000 UTC]

thanks!

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CrimsonNightshade In reply to Oshouki [2007-11-29 01:13:52 +0000 UTC]

Welcome!

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wynnter89 [2007-11-26 21:00:29 +0000 UTC]

Thats is so so cool !

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Oshouki In reply to wynnter89 [2007-11-27 05:24:09 +0000 UTC]

Thanks!!

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e-quahlo [2007-11-26 16:18:19 +0000 UTC]

Awesome! I think it looks extraordinary without color except for in her name.

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Oshouki In reply to e-quahlo [2007-11-26 16:58:15 +0000 UTC]

Thanks!! I tried desaturating the title to gray but it didn't look as striking. You really think its fine the way it is? For one of the many incarnations of this, I was going to paint in Iris in pale muted colour (kinda like old hand coloured b/w photos.)

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e-quahlo In reply to Oshouki [2007-11-26 17:05:44 +0000 UTC]

Oh that would be so cool! If you plan to do different things be sure to keep the older versions somewhere so we can look and compare. But that's an awesome idea! Pale muted colors. Have you ever seen 's soft water colors? I know it's yaoi mostly, but her soft style added with at least one vibrant color is gorgeous. Maybe you'd like to take a look?

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