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selune — Your dream

Published: 2003-08-09 07:40:14 +0000 UTC; Views: 572; Favourites: 2; Downloads: 35
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Description It was your wish to leave the earth,
To float unbound in morning sky,
To burn this life while giving birth
To dreams that live and never die.

I played the game, I took the role,
Assepting duty that implied
Clear mind and dedicated soul,
And truth of heart, a little blind.

Of, yes, we almost reached the star,
We shared so much more than regrets:
Delight and pain and tender scars,
Success, defeats and nervous frets...

And yet we failed to stay unite -
Perhaps my hands were cold for you,
Perhaps I needed too much light
Or could not ban your midnight blues.

I feel I have to let you go,
It's time to end this useless race,
Foresee things needed to forego
And say good-by without embrace.
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Comments: 13

haplo [2003-10-09 19:52:32 +0000 UTC]

This is really good I like it a lot!!

*cheers*

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forevernight [2003-09-14 19:54:50 +0000 UTC]

awww beautiful... i like, it flows so softly.. i feel just in the mood for reading this.. great poem

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icklefluffywolfy [2003-08-21 13:51:13 +0000 UTC]

Very soft and melancholically (that's not a real word is it?! oh well...) beautiful. Perfect rhyming and deeply emotional. Very nice work indeed!

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dunkler-adlig [2003-08-18 17:59:06 +0000 UTC]

wow that's cool. i like it quite a bit... *considers favoriting it* it's a lot like how i want to write, but never quite figured out how to do...

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dreary-sinner [2003-08-18 08:32:29 +0000 UTC]

wow. very powerful emotions. i think everybody here can understand what you want to tell. i'm very touched and very sorry for you.

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selune [2003-08-11 12:47:45 +0000 UTC]

Shit, so many typos... *rubs ashes into her hair*

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maiden13 [2003-08-10 23:54:25 +0000 UTC]

very beautiful....so very stron the words are...and so touching...and i can totally relate...too bad i can't write like this...

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zaknafein [2003-08-10 23:30:30 +0000 UTC]

Wow. Such a wonderful poem, and a wonderful deviation thumbnail altogether... And holyhell, you managed to make it rhyme, this must've taken days to write... It does wake very powerful emotions in me, and I think I can rely just as much as sonnentau....

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sonnentau [2003-08-10 03:54:52 +0000 UTC]

oh my god.....

i was never touched more by a poem.. not in the last months.... it's so heartbreaking fitting right now.... i can rely to every syllable, every word, every verse.... and these aren't empty words, for you don't write empty poetry....

as painful as it is, it also contains a certain beauty.... like something covered under lots and lots of dirt and scars and pain.. a dramatic beauty.... pathetic maybe.. but truely felt...



sonnentau

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chamunan [2003-08-09 15:42:18 +0000 UTC]

I can't wait to see what else you've written in your absence and if it's as wonderful as this poem. I'm really happy you're back.

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crazy-jane [2003-08-09 15:35:57 +0000 UTC]

Lovely work...it certainly has a classical feel to it.

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chilipalmer [2003-08-09 14:01:43 +0000 UTC]

Wow beautiful work Very touching. Brought tears to my eyes u ok?

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selune In reply to chilipalmer [2003-08-09 14:50:15 +0000 UTC]

Yeah, certainly, I'm OK, just a little culture shock from this strange DA3 version. For instance, I still have to figure out where to find the deviations submitted by those on my +devwatch.
How are you?

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