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Sir-Douglas-of-Fir — The Trouble with Skyrim: This Means War Part 82
#argonian #civilwar #comic #dragonborn #orc #shelob #thismeanswar #werewolf #elderscrollsskyrim #eriktheslayer #shahvee #stormcloaks #ulfricstormcloak #wuunferth #brunwulf #neetrenaza #standsinshallows #part82
Published: 2017-11-18 03:24:47 +0000 UTC; Views: 3577; Favourites: 9; Downloads: 1
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It's probably a bad sign when the opening statement of my write-up about a Skyrim comic mentions the Anti-Defamation League, but here we are anyway. I’d encourage anyone who doesn’t quite get what Shelob’s going for in Panel 2 to give the ol’ ADL website a visit and see for themselves. Apologies in advance to the Stormcloak fans in the audience, but at this point, you really shouldn't be surprised that the Stormies in this story arc are drawing those kinds of comparisons.Shelob and Ulfric are fighting in the Pit, which is actually a piece of cut content from the vanilla game. Originally, the idea was for players arrested in Windhelm to serve their sentence fighting in the arena instead of just waiting it out, but this was cut for one reason or other. It's been restored by the mod Faction: Pit Fighter by Thirteenoranges . The little entrance to it from the barracks was added by me in the Creation Kit, which it why it looks like doo doo.
And so, after months and months of teasing, Ulfric's armor has finally been turned to gold!
This was made possible thanks to Golden Plate Armor by Zoombir . I'll add that and the previously mentioned mod to my credits page sometime when I'm not about to fall over from lack of sleep.Prev: fav.me/dbtcw6x
Next: fav.me/dbum1gn
New to the strip? Start here! fav.me/d9zyngp
Screenshots taken in Skyrim, edited in GIMP
List of mod credits available here: fav.me/d6hir6a
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Comments: 52
I was actually really excited to see the Pit! That's awesome!
And thank you for finally turning Ulfric's suit gold. That was irritatingly long! What's with you man?!?!? 82 episodes?!?!?!?! That's longer than your Kingdom Comes storyline! Sheesh!
(Feel free to give me a hard time about anything that you think has taken way too long to address in my comic 
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It was a last-minute decision, so I'm glad it worked out.
Well, the thing that springs to mind is how long it's taken for your main couple to get together, and they still haven't consummated the relationship, so there's that
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Hehehehe, how did I know you were going to go there?
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Give 'im the chair!
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Is this the part of the climax that was climaxed to make it more climactic? Cause good grief is it ever. And thank the Nine Ulfric's been brought down to normal now. Or would that be brought down to badass, since he's still got shouts? Iunno.
Also, I was expecting a pyrrhic victory for the empire somewhat, but it doesn't seem so far that that'll be the case. Unless Shelob actually ends up biting it (hold the werewolf puns) and Aela takes revenge on Ulfric for it. Really not seeing any heavy losses. Or any losses. Unless I'm forgetting someone.
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I'm gonna say Brought Down to Badass. That suit still gives him enhanced strength, don't forget, even if the weight slows him down now.
Well, the battle ain't over yet. I'm eager to discuss that subject, actually, but I can't yet because spoilers.
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Well I bet this is gonna be long. I'm sure Ulfric still has things up his sleeve. I can't wait.
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Hope I don't disappoint!
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Wuunferth is going to be furious when he wakes up, probably in a cell.
Ulfric's armor and weapons may be heavier, but I'm guessing he'll try to use the weight to his advantage, making his strikes hit harder.
Of course, we all know how this will end. Ulfric's gold armor will be a fine suit to be buried in.
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Oh, he's furious now. He just can't do anything about it for a while.
He's pretty much become Metal Mario. We'll see whether that does him any favors or not.
I pity his poor pallbearers if they put him in a coffin with that stuff on.
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Ah, I thought "stunned" would knock him unconscious. But I guess it's more like paralysis?
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Hmm, perhaps in the future Erik could have some clever and creative people augment his suit with additional non-lethal weaponry to stop criminals and other people Erik doesn't want to kill but still needs to deal with.
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Did not know about this Pit business, but including it was a great idea 
And I'm glad Erik outsmarted ole Wuunferth there. Saved prisoners and a bit of ErikShahvee fluff made me happy!
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Glad you think so!
I swear, those kids are just too cute together.
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WELCOME TO THE ARENA! There's even a Yellow Team and a Blue Team thanks to their armours!
Was that intentional?
Really wished that The Pit was kept in the game
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No, it wasn't intentional, but that was a good observation.
It would've been pretty neat, though having people watch prisoners fight to the death while there was a murderer on the loose would not have helped Windhelm's reputation any.
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The final climatic battle.
Always better when both combatants are stripped to their raw skills
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They really ought to do this Predator style and strip to their waists before fistfighting on a precariously perched log.
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Charge that motherbuzzer like the berserk you are dear Shelob. (Man I love axes)
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Shelob's been meaning to axe Ulfric a few questions for a long time coming now.
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Axecedingly good pun there lad. Axecelent storywriting btw.
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(ANNNNNNND HERE IT IS!!! THE FINAL SHOWDOWN THE BIG KAHUNA, THE LAST TRUE BATTLE FOR THE FATE OF SYKRIM!!
NO MORE TRICKS! NO MORE SPECIAL WEAKNESSES! NO MORE MISMATCHED BATTLING!!! (*Cough* Except for gold against a vastly superior smithing material which is totally his own freaking fault *Cough*)
ALL IT IS NOW IS MAN AGAINST MAN IN A VICIOUS PIT-FIGHT TO THE DEATH!!! WHO WILL WIN?! WHO WILL LOSE!? WHY AM I ASKING YOU THIS!? WELL YOU'RE THE WRITER DANG IT!!! WE FIND OUT NEXT TIME!!! ... Assuming that there isn't a cliffhanger... which there probably will be... sooooo... sometime after next time, probably? ... Yeahhhhhhhhh...
Anyways, this is what we've all been waiting for. Ulfric's silver has been turned to gold, his attempted cheap-shotting is reduced to the single worst metal type for combat, and Shelob's in the second-best, and an ancient and really awesome one to. The fight is real, it's man against man, and there's no more places to run. The last, final conflict, between these men who hate each other possibly more than anyone else, and have certainly done more harm to the other than anyone else has managed to do... seriously, the guy who was literally a reflection of Shelob and built to be his dark side didn't cause this much trouble for him.
Everything has been leading up to this, and I am salivating to see it done... and to see Ulfric finally, FINALLY, get his just rewards... Oh, and for Shelob to hopefully have a happy ending. That would be nice to.)
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Well, it won't be next time, I can say that much. 
But yeah, it truly cannot be overstated how much these two hate each other. I've mentioned before that Ulfric has become the the Lex Luthor to Shelob's Superman, and I still hold to that. Should be fun to watch the carnage.
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Gold can be molded by hands . . . Can we see Shelob punch the dragon dung outta Ulfric and his golden suit? XD
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Well, just between you and me, I'm taking a few liberties with gold's durability. I feel justified in doing so, since in this game quicksilver is solid at room temperature and ebony is not wood.
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True, but i think ebony is actually what they call obsidian in this game, volcanic black glass like material, extremely hard and even harder to work with as a material
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"I'm here with a magazine to talk about continuing the Nord race!"
"Not interested."
"I'm... a sexy Nord woman here to help continue the Nord race!"
"One moment, ma'am."
Hope Shelob saved the game before this.
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"Bwahaha! I've won! The Stormcloaks are victorious! What have you to say to that, Shelob?"
"... F9."
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Runs away and flings it everywhere
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YOU USED THE PIT!!!!!!! Muah ha ha ha! I don't know whether we gave you the idea or not, but I'm taking credit in my mind.
And the battle's on! That was a low blow, Ulfric, but it was almost made worth it by the little lovebird reunion.
So, until next week, can I interest you in this pamphlet on Shor?
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Yup, that idea came straight from RtA. I couldn't resist.
I've really grown fond of Erik and Shahvee. Don't you just wanna pinch their cheeks?
Oh, sure. "Page One: Your God Is Dead (But He's Still Okay)."
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And...FIGHT!
I'm glad we contributed. Now it makes even more sense for someone to go there and totally not brood.
Is it racist to ask if Shahvee has cheeks?
Page Two: Elves Are Bad (Unless They Have Boobs)
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No one knows for sure. Imperial scholars have tried to ascertain whether Argonians have cheeks, but they've all felt too awkward to ask directly.
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...I have a phalanx of adorable children willing to walk right up and earnestly ask them.
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I'm a bit skeptical about comparing the Stormcloaks to Nazis (I personally think the Thalmor are better suited for that) but the way you developed Ulfric was believable enough. You never know truly the darkness of a man's heart unless you push him to the brink.
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If we're talking actual Nazis, then you'd be 100% correct. However, if we're talking white supremacist dipwads who appropriate Nazi imagery in an attempt to legitimize their hate, well... the seeds are visible in the base game. See: aggressive Stormcloak guard dialogue toward elves and beast races, segregation in Windhelm, Avulstein's little Nord supremacy spiel buried in his dialogue, literally every word out of Korir's mouth, etc.
I've turned it all the way up to eleven in this story, but no one will ever convince me the Stormcloaks wouldn't be capable of this crap if pressed hard enough. Which is ironic, given their intense hatred of the Nazi elves Thalmor, but that's human nature for you.
I am glad you thought my development was believable.
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I never found that dialogue of Avulstein's. The wiki page on him was... annoyingly short.
I've already made the decision that Thalmor = Nazis in my own story and it's reflected in Lorasha's past. Her chronic illness was "weakness" and a lot of other Altmer told her parents to just let her die and have another, stronger child, and I wanted that to reflect how Nazis were firm believers in eugenics (like Josef Mengele). Modern Neo-Nazis and White Supremacists are small in number and get way more attention than they deserve, so they won't be in my story. I'm hoping they fade back into obscurity someday, but I'm not holding my breath. The media loves their Boogeyman and the money they make off the ratings they get from them to let that happen.
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not my ulfric, not my stormies, not my ulfric, not my stormies...
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I am prepped for the final fight, also SUCK IT ULFRIC!
this is legit the best anime-like story I've read
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Don't forget your popcorn and 3D glasses!
Thanks!
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