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synchrochick007 β I never...
Published: 2008-04-30 18:17:19 +0000 UTC; Views: 504; Favourites: 3; Downloads: 8
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I never told you I loved you,kept hidden the things we shared
I never told you I loved you,
pretended that I never cared
I made believe you were my chaplain
even though nothing ever happened
I never told you I loved you
when I used to hide
you helped me perceive,
made me believe,
opened up deep down inside
I never told you I loved you
never before have I tried,
but Iβve taken too long
and now youβre gone
never to see the tears that I cried
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Comments: 22
The Bohemain Beatnick stricks again. Hon, a word of advice for my best friend, grow up, leave your fantasy world 'cause otherwise life is so going to suck! And enough with the Bohemain Beatnick already!
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ok ok, I love you
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sorry sweetie, I just have to be the realist in this relationship otherwise we would both be way out of it.
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I'm not as much of a bohemian Beatnik anymore... I want to be a scientist now...
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WTF!!!!!!!!! Who are you and what have you done with my best friend!!!!!!!
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Well... I've always been fickle!
Actually, you shouldn't worry. You see I've found something that has very much reawakened the poet in me recently...
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Really, what might that be love?
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This person that is now giving me much grief >.>
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Not sure why, but the structure feels awkward. Switching from a repeating-every-other-line pattern to every one in a while repeat seems rather clunky, while your rhyme scheme leaves one with a scattered feeling.
And inaction if preferable to overaction. Ever tried giving everything you are to someone who never bothered to act?
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Is. Inaction is preferable. Pardon the typo.
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Why ever would you want to leave your Fantasy World? They'll have to blast me out of mine with TNT. Like your poem but "chaplain" seems like an odd word out. Not sure why....
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auch
auch
auch
but awsome
I really like it
heartbreaker*
but awsome...
[sorry the basic english ^^u]
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thank you! don't worry about poor English, it's many people's first languages and still not very easy for them.
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hahahaha!!
so I have to feel better
and welcome
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*I made believe you were my chaplain* would flow better like *I pretended that you were my chaplain*
Anyway, have a
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No, I disagree. '
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thank you very much, that was my first phrasing, but I already used the word "pretend" and didn't want to use it again.
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I think it would be a shame to live anywhere else.
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lol...it takes away from the beauty of living in this world...no matter how wonderful the other might be
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