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xBramblestarx — count to ten
Published: 2010-07-22 01:46:35 +0000 UTC; Views: 718; Favourites: 11; Downloads: 2
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Description 1.

count the marks on the walls.

one, blood
two, splattered
three, in
four, sick
five, screams
six, of
seven, agony
eight, twisting
nine, across
ten, time

this is you.

walls? there are none;
there is nothing;
there is everything;
darkness.

are you afraid?
          yes

paralyzed with fear,
tears running down your cheeks,
silent shrieks of terror
          please save me

save you? from no one but yourself.


2.

remember color, sight, heartbreaking touch.

two, nothing
three, was
four, ever
five, real
six, except
seven, terrifying
eight, soul
nine, splitting
ten, pain

is this you?

what was real? panic;
you are alone;
you were always alone;
trapped.

your name.
          i can't remember

who are you?
how can you be sure these are your hands?
how can you be sure these are hands at all?
          i'll do anything

anything? let you out, let you out, let you out.


3.

hold on to who you are.

three, screaming
four, as
five, i
six, am
seven, ripped
eight, away
nine, from
ten, me

time is everything.

is there time? never was;
thought up to keep the thoughts away;
thought up for something to hold on to;
gone.

how old are you?
          i don't know

years and years,
seconds and minutes and hours and days,
as old as the universe, as young as the darkness
          it's been forever

forever? forever to you is a millisecond of sand.


4.

don't think.

four, turn
five, off
six, everything
seven, pleading
eight, begging
nine, to
ten, live

locked within yourself.

beg the answers? stop questioning;
spinning in circles, confined dark void;
spinning in circles, going going going;
mad.

do you believe in life?
          i had a dream

memories warped out of proportion,
twisted around a dark heart,
fogged with thought going on and on and on and on
          i created the world upside down

created? held on to, mutilated, shattered and pieced together without glue.


5.

it's coming for you.

five, fight
six, ghosts
seven, with
eight, teeth
nine, claws
ten, blood

you believe what you see.

attack? but it's all in your mind;
imagining the cuts gushing blood;
imagining the stabs of sharpest knife;
real.

they're laughing at you.
          i can hear them

being cut open,
horror and sanity buried alive,
strike out in fear, stumble through mist
          they're a part of me

a part? that consumes and traps, takes over the mind.


6.

open your eyes.

six, convince
seven, me
eight, that
nine, nothing
ten, exists

there is no awake.

nightmares? how can you tell;
sleeping fades into waking;
waking fades into sleeping;
delusional.

just wake up.
          how will i know

demons playing hide and seek,
cutting tiny circles in dark places,
close your eyes to wake up and fall asleep
          it never ends

never ends? the end was the beginning.


7.

what is feeling?

seven, numb
eight, silence
nine, a
ten, gift

remember to forget.

emotion? but what and why;
when nothingness sets in;
when the haze is a blessing;
home.

who are you?
          it doesn't matter

cold emptiness,
bleeding pain, loneliness, sorrow,
sink into tomorrow's yesterday
          i am no one

no one? because you have forgotten.


8.

you are alone.

eight, where
nine, i
ten, was

the first and the last.

are you someone? no;
not if you cannot grab onto a piece of yourself;
not if you cannot remember how to think;
over.

you exist.
          i don't understand

how do memories get lost in nothing,
give yourself away to yourself,
a shell that still breaths
          what is

is? nothing but everything, lost.


9.

save this life.

nine, but
ten, why

shorter, shorter, not sweet but tasteless.

no words? find some;
at the bottom of the void;
at the bottom of the vacant soul;
abandoned.

have you given up?
          there's nothing to save

once upon a time,
there was nothing,
but darkness
          i was someone

was? hold on forever and it'll never be long enough.


10.

count the marks on the walls.

ten, me

this is you.

walls? there are none;
there is nothing;
there is everything;
darkness.

are you afraid?
          no

there is nothing here,
what once was,
gone
          am i

save you? from no one but yourself.
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Comments: 7

WarriorsoStarclan [2014-04-15 19:17:43 +0000 UTC]

amazing

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

Bluefire111 [2010-08-07 16:06:16 +0000 UTC]

Wow. Wow. Just... wow. This is really good and really scary at the same time. I can see where you got your inspiration from...

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

towards-eternity [2010-08-06 15:52:42 +0000 UTC]

I adore it too, this is INCREDIBLE.
And about your latest fascination being insanity, well... If you ever want to talk to someone who thinks she's a nutter, and who's definitely been one before, I'm your girl. x3;

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

leafylaurel [2010-07-22 22:49:51 +0000 UTC]

WOW... that was so intense. O.o Breathtaking- great work!!

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

hannahthe-HOST [2010-07-22 03:57:42 +0000 UTC]

whoa. just.. amazing.

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

Mrs-Sin [2010-07-22 01:50:44 +0000 UTC]

You have every right to adore this; it's fantastic! I love it!

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

xBramblestarx In reply to Mrs-Sin [2010-07-22 01:55:38 +0000 UTC]

Aw, thank you.

👍: 0 ⏩: 0