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I-am-Britta — Come On Now
Published: 2011-07-18 05:55:25 +0000 UTC; Views: 4842; Favourites: 325; Downloads: 34
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Description
In today's society, it is almost frowned upon to be single. You're inevitably assumed to have some sort of problem, disease, or sexual identity crisis simply because you don't want to be in a relationship. Marriage is viewed as a cure-all for your entire life. Are you unhappy? Get married. Are you lonely? Get married. Do you not think you make enough money? Get married. People who are married, despite what goes on in their marriage, are assumed to be happy, fulfilled, and successful. Those of us who are single are assumed to be the opposite.This isn't to say that people can't be happy married or that everyone is content being single. Obviously, there are very happily-married couples and single people longing for marriage, and that's just fine... great in fact! Different people need different things. This stamp is a way of saying that if you're single, there's nothing wrong with you and that just because marriage is held up on a pedestal of awesomeness, it doesn't mean it's the best solution for every problem you have.
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Comments: 30
I personally do want to get married, but I can respect those that don't. It's kind of like how having kids is not always a success.
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I believe you should married because you want to. Not because everyone else pressures you to do it. Their are plenty of people who happy and single. Not mention the people who say "Marriage will make you." don't explain the work it takes. It like marriage is a safety net. A faulty safety net but how people treat it.
Then their are people who is happy with marriage. Those are the people that put work into the marriage. Yet now a days it just sad. There is way to much divorce these days and I'm beginning to lose faith in marriage. The only thing that's keeping my faith alive is my mom and dad but not legally married.
I hate it when someone pressure a person into relationships. It never ends well.
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being a married stay-at-home mother is a crime for the majority of people, too
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Too much risk in getting married these days. Being married is actually just fine. It's just when she calls for a divorce that things start going down hill.
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Yeah, I'm not even sure I'll find someone anymore. People nowadays, regardless of gender (or even age), are so immature that I'm starting to wonder how long we go before marriage is considered completely useless.
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Not sure that time will ever come. It's getting so bad that we're likely to experience some sort of revolution first, after which there will be no more financial incentives for divorce and the sexes will be able to admit they need each other again.
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Ah, money... the root of all kinds of evil. It's like people are substituting basic human companionship with money and other self-entitlement stuff.
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Technically, in this case money is actually being used by the real evil, the state. They seek to create social disharmony in order to increase their own power.
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Yeah, that makes sense. It's almost like they're using it as bait to encourage divorce.
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It's amazing how much society has degraded.
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you can't be happy in marriage if you go in misserable
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when I met lara I was happy being alone now I happy with her. To many people don't see that
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That's great! It definitely takes the right person. ^^
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Marriage is unnatural anyway. People are conditioned to want it, but over 50% of them end in divorce, and the ones which don't probably remain so due to economic/kid-related reasons, with few exceptions. Marriage has, historically speaking, never had very much at all to do with "love." It used to be a tool by which people could divide themselves (i.e. aristocrats marry only aristocrats, etc), and later on became a tool through which wealthier members of lower classes could buy their way into having their children hold an aristocratic title (i.e. the bourgeoisie marrying broke aristocrats).
Only until the mid 20th century did the idea of romantic lover ever really enter the picture, and it's been with us ever since...the idea of marriage being some sort of ultimate fulfillment. I suspect too many 1950s conditioning films on what is "normal" are to blame for that.
For the people who say marriage is undergoing a "crisis" in modern times...well, this is nothing new. It just so happens that prior to the late 20th century, divorce was viewed upon with much social stigma, especially in regards to divorced women. Historically, people (mostly men but also women, especially in the aristocracy and among the rich) have sought extramarital affairs, without anyone really thinking anything of it (see: literature).
The rise of women's rights in the 20th century did away with much of the double-standards which permeated centuries prior, and the removed stigma regarding divorce allowed for more people to seek out the option. The only thing in people's way, as far as obstacles are concerned, are finances (marrieds often share bank accounts, houses, etc) and children.
In short, the statistics are not surprising, and marriage has never been this life-fulfilling ideal. Otherwise, there would have been no need for affairs and/or prostitutes/concubines throughout history. The idea of the "ideal" marriage is largely a fantasy we are conditioned to crave since childhood. It doesn't exist, just like unicorns and non-fattening cake.
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Considering about 50% of marriages end in divorce, I don't think it's really that special any more. I'm sure as hell not doing it, too patriarchal for my liking.
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I agree. To each their own, right?
I hate the looks people give me when they find out I've never had a boyfriend before. :/
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You can still have friends who you can have strong connections with if you're single. You can also not love your spouse as much as you'd like, and have problems in marriage.
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I am 15 and single. I always see my frinds gab about their BFs and some ask me why I am single and I simply say what is the point of having one. And honestly, I don't know many guys. Haha.
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That's so true! My grandma and aunt asks me every time I see them if I have a boyfriend yet. The answer is ALWAYS no, which makes the conversation so fun. :I My friends also seem to be on the bandwagon, always have to have a boyfriend.
I don't need a relationship to be a functioning and happy person.
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Oh god marriage.
Like relationships aren't awful enough.
I mean I get all mushy when I see a cute couple, I like seeing people happy, but thinking of myself in that position? Ugh.
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You know what's funny? A guy tried to insult me, and one of the things he told me was, "You'll never get married."
I laughed in his face, because I've no interest in living with a person. I LIKE being alone. 
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Crazy cat ladies are the best
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EXACTLY! Finally, someone who gets it.
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Preach it... My grandparents are all worried about me because I've never dated and I'm almost 18. Truth is I just don't care.
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I agree with this. Marriage shouldn't be something that is so great. I have an aunt and an uncle who have not been married and are not in a relationship. Both are not likely to get married, but they have been successful and content with life.
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