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Gedros — Hot Chocolate
Published: 2005-02-22 18:15:44 +0000 UTC; Views: 171; Favourites: 1; Downloads: 5
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Description
Standing there in anold night gown stood an old woman I called
Great Gramma. My mommy had driven us from
Oklahoma to West Virginia in uncounted
days. I was a young boy who barely
remembered the trip. Having to pee in a soda bottle in
the back of moving van cannot
be forgotten. Tired. Was
this the lady I had spoken to
one the phone? We were ushered
into her home. It smelled funny. Curious. The lights
were all dim. Great Gramma gave me
a Snickers bar and hot chocolate while
some television show played in the back ground. Why
were we here? It was cold and I
enjoyed the warmth of my steaming drink. I didn't
know why we had left mommy's family. I hardly
even remembered the man who was briefly called father. I had no
father now. It didn't matter as I sipped my
chocolate and brightly asked Great
Gramma if I could watch Inspector Gadget
here too. My only concern was
watching my favorite television show and
eating my candy. Content. I don't remember why my
mother wanted to go to school here and
leave her own mother and sisters
behind in Oklahoma. All that I can remember
is how good my chocolates tasted.
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Comments: 3
It really doesn't flow. The punctuation needs an overhaul as does the line breaking.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
All of it was experimentation. We were supposed to model it after another memory poem from our readings. I chose one with odd line breaks and rythm. Also, it depends on how you read it, there are different ways to read a poem.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
That's fair enough. Doesn't really work for me though. I'll have a look at your other stuff as you can obviously write.
👍: 0 ⏩: 0