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ratiocinative — hurt
Published: 2005-06-19 08:32:44 +0000 UTC; Views: 1223; Favourites: 24; Downloads: 55
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Description
I am posting both poetry and a photograph in one deviation. The strength of my feelings toward both is equal, but i consider myself a photographer over a writer, therefore am putting it in photography.----------------------------------------------------------
Hurt.
the caress of your talon
impaling me
weakening beyond words
overwelmed with emotions
confused beyond belief
in a cloud of unknown
i am wounded
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Comments: 6
I wanted to comment on this earlier but got all mixed up. I can't remember the exact term (could be contrast) but it's cool how you've seperated the image into color, and darkness. (Contrast? is that it?) Great shot overall, shows emotion and gives a very warm feeling. The only thig I would change: Crop the image just a bit to keep in consideration with the "rule of thirds." Right now, my eyes don't know exactly where they should be focusing. As for the writing it is totally the opposite of my style but I still like it. Perhaps needs proper punctuation (Something I've been taught to wtch out for recently!) I would like to see one more verse. You just get me started, then drop me off. I want to know why and when! You've given me who and what! Good job man, can't wait to see some more of both.
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woo! thanks! contrast is using opposites beside each other (ie light and dark). image is very close to "as shot", darkened and tweaked the colors just a tad. appreciate your thought about the 'rule of thirds', but i didnt think it applied here - i tried a crop but it changed the feel of the pic. as for the writing, i agree it needs another verse, and its totally a tease. completely a stream of conciousness, and thats all that came out. i briefly thought of what emotion could also be translated into it, but came up blank, so i left it as raw. care to elaborate on what you mean by punctuation? if youre just talking about capitals commas etc.. its been a long time since ive looked at rules for writing any sort of prose, and i was never good with them to start with.
Thanks for the critique, much appreciated
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wow. the lighting -is- awesome. I love it 
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Beautiful composition there and a very nicely done pose too. I just love how the light hits your hair and gradually recedes into darkness. Although it's subtle, the way your hands are fiddling in frustration really adds to the overall atmosphere of this shot as well as how look to the light from the darkness... wonderful
I can definitely empathise with you here, not feeling that great myself.
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Thanks for your comment. The lighting was wonderous. The photo is not actually of me (I am not a female..) - though it doesnt change the fact that i feel this way.
which makes me wonder how many more people would comment if i was a girl.
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